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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

While I have to work my butt off for extra money, we are not giving them a dime

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 59 Replies

Me and DH have been having a harder time then usual financially. This is almost entirely because our insurance premiums have almost doubled. We used to have about $400 a month after everything was paid for (bills, groceries and anything else we needed) now we save almost nothing. We have a 7 year old, an almost 5 year old, a 3 year old and I am pregnant again.

Because of this, I have decided to babysit from home. The only even close to reasonable offer I got was $100 a week for a 2 year old, 5 days a week, all day. I also have to provide breakfast, lunch and 2 snacks. It works out to be not a lot of money, especially for this very active child but it is money and we need extra money. I am 15 weeks pregnant and have actually lost a few lbs because my morning sickness has been so bad. It is much better with rest, I have almost no problems during the weekend but during the week, it is bad because I don't get a chance to rest. But like I said, my famiy needs the money so I am doing what I have to. We plan on using the money I make ( I have been doing this for 5 weeks already and will be doing it for another 6, until the child's grandmother moves in town) to add to our savings and to buy the few baby things that we need (a double stroller and a car seat).

Now, my in laws are also having a harder time financially. They have talked to all 3 of their kids, asking if each child will give them a monthly amount of money to keep them going. They said between the 3 of them, they need another $400 a month to keep going. SIL makes a good amount of money and she agreed to give $200 a month, BIL doesn't have a lot of money. He said he would help where he can but he can't commit to anything monthly. When DH told me about this, he actually said "how much do you think we can give them". WHAT? I am sick all the time but still taking care of our kids, the house, him AND an extra kid just for a little bit of extra money that we "need" but you think we are in the position to give them anything? I also reminded him that I only have this job for another 6 weeks or so. This feels like a slap in my face. He sees how hard this is on me, he knows I am doing this to help our family yet he is willing to give money away? He then had the nerve to call me selfish.

He was really mad at my reaction but when he woke up this morning, he did say that he thought I was right about not being able to give them money. I am still hurt though at the way he acted last night.

Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 18, 2013 at 2:36 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 18, 2013 at 2:36 PM

BUMP!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 18, 2013 at 2:36 PM

BUMP!

TashaB82
by Tootie on Aug. 18, 2013 at 2:38 PM
1 mom liked this
Yeah your family comes first and he needs to understand. Especially if your struggling already
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Aug. 18, 2013 at 2:39 PM
1 mom liked this
Keep track of your cash and bank account. Sounds like maybe he told you what you wanted to hear it is going to be sneaking cash behind your back
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 18, 2013 at 2:40 PM

Thankfully he does see it now but it really hurt my feelings the way he was acting last night. And he has been really moody today about it.



Quoting TashaB82:

Yeah your family comes first and he needs to understand. Especially if your struggling already



TranquilMind
by Ruby Member on Aug. 18, 2013 at 2:40 PM
1 mom liked this

 Why are the inlaws having a hard time? I would help a tiny amount if I were you, but on the other hand, I can't imagine the parents asking the kids.  The kids offering, yes....but not the parents asking. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Aug. 18, 2013 at 2:40 PM
They want their grown children to give them a monthly stipend? Is there a reason they cannot work extra hours - a legitimate disease or disability that has put them in a bind?
littlelamb303
by Ruby Member on Aug. 18, 2013 at 2:41 PM

it is not your responsiblity to care for your inlaws(especially if you have no money to give)  He is being unreasonable.  You should also be getting more than $100 a week to babysit an active 2 yr old, (including meals) 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 18, 2013 at 2:41 PM

I doubt it because he knows I am the one who handles the money. He has access to it but he knows that I will notice even $5 missing



Quoting Anonymous:

Keep track of your cash and bank account. Sounds like maybe he told you what you wanted to hear it is going to be sneaking cash behind your back



Caera
by on Aug. 18, 2013 at 2:42 PM
5 moms liked this

It's his parents. Of course his first reaction is going to be "What can we do?". But then he apologized and says you're right. Time for you to let it go and move on.

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