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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Ultimatum.....

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 25 Replies
I've never been a big fan of this ever. However, I feel like I'm in the losing end of my relationship.

My boyfriend of four years has stopped contributing financially to this family. I have to nag him to pay 50% of the bills - rent, water, electricity, and gas.

I also have my own bills to pay on top of those - cell phone, childcare, and a credit card. I have always been financially sound. Always. I feel I make good choices and budget well.

He has a great job that pays around $20/hour with overtime. I do not know where all his money goes.

I can not even have fun with the man because I wonder what bill he is neglecting to pay for whatever it is that we're doing. I just can't do it anymore. On top of that, I pay for all the bills so I can't even afford to have my own fun.

He's a great guy MINUS this HUGE piece of the puzzle. He says he wants to get married - but how can we get married when he can't even 'afford' to pay bills.

So, after much, much, much talk about these issues - I'm thinking about giving him an ultimatum. Are there any positives to doing this or are there only bad outcomes? Would you just split up and move on instead of giving him another chance? Thanks!
Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 23, 2013 at 9:19 AM
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Replies (1-10):
seksen
by Gold Member on Aug. 23, 2013 at 9:21 AM
I would tell him, pull your head out of your ass or I'm gone..
B1Bomber
by Platinum Member on Aug. 23, 2013 at 9:21 AM
1 mom liked this

I wouldn't marry a man that needed an ultimatum. Either we share values or we do not.

lancet98
by Platinum Member on Aug. 23, 2013 at 9:21 AM

The most positive possibility would be that the two of you break up!

notjstasocermom
by Ruby Member on Aug. 23, 2013 at 9:23 AM

i would move on

CelestialSong
by on Aug. 23, 2013 at 9:23 AM

What is his excuse for not paying his share of the bills?

Katieatie
by on Aug. 23, 2013 at 9:23 AM


Agree, if a relationship gets to the point that you feel you need an ultimatum, its over with. 

Quoting B1Bomber:

I wouldn't marry a man that needed an ultimatum. Either we share values or we do not.



deenakate
by on Aug. 23, 2013 at 9:23 AM

Sit him down, talk about finances, and see what's going on, Ultimatums very rarely work.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Aug. 23, 2013 at 9:23 AM
I don't even know that I want to get married. This is the ONLY issue we have.


Quoting B1Bomber:

I wouldn't marry a man that needed an ultimatum. Either we share values or we do not.


MomOf3AngelBabe
by Platinum Member on Aug. 23, 2013 at 9:26 AM

Oh boy. This is a tough one. Has his behavior changed? Is he maybe paying on student loans, child support, anything he might feel badly for not telling you about before?

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Aug. 23, 2013 at 9:26 AM
There is no excuse, he just doesn't pay them. I'm non confrontational person so I just pay them. I have always been extremely independent and to say I need his help absolutely kills me.


Quoting CelestialSong:

What is his excuse for not paying his share of the bills?


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