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Where the hell is an adult!

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

Sad


Video in replies

I understand that children pick on each other, it's normal. But "watch me beat up this little kid"? Seems like a control issue. An unacceptable issue to hurt something smaller than you, that cannot defend themselves against you.

Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 28, 2013 at 1:42 AM
Replies (111-119):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Aug. 28, 2013 at 6:14 AM

Sucks for you. Seems like you have more issues than the way you were disciplined as a child.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Everyone always has a story.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

"I'm not saying just spanking, I'm saying physical force over all." Do you not understand that? 

And obviously you did do things you weren't supposed to do if you had a kid at 14.

I was spanked and did all kinds of shit I shouldn't have done. 


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

"Physically force is usually a release." 

Those are my exact words and yes they are true. People typically result to physical force (I'm not saying just spanking, I'm saying physical force over all) as a release. 


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Do you understand what I'm saying though? Yes, spanking does teach you to hit smaller ones.You were spanked so you spank your kids, and when you spank your kids you ARE hitting something smaller. (Not you personally, in general.) 

And the difference between grounding and spanking is that it does not result in any physical force. Physical force is usually a release. Grounding CAN be vindictive if taken to the extreme, but speaking typically it is not.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

I'm trying to word this the right way.

Okay, what I'm saying is, it DOES teach them to hit something smaller than them in their adult lives because they spank just like they were spanked.  In my original comment( about the other woman technically being right), I was speaking of them as ADULTS.

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

I think it teaches them that as a child, you do not have the same boundries as an adult. 

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Bellarose0212:

Kids learn by watching their models. It's just true. Does that mean that every kid who spanks will do this? No, I'm not saying that. But, I doubt being spanked will teach these kids anything about empathy. It will just reinforce that the person with the most power in the situation can/should do whatever they want to the person with the least power.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Bellarose0212:


They probably do get spanked or maybe worse. That's probably where they learned that if you're bigger, it's okay to hurt someone smaller because you can.

Quoting Anonymous:

The majority of the time I'm against spanking, but in this case I am FOR it. If you've messed your kids up this much already, you need drastic measures to fix it.


Quoting Sweetie1216:

Need their asses beat.





What a crock? You know what I learned from spanking? If you decide to misbehave, there are consequences. One of them was spanking and that was the least torturous.

Being put in my room did not teach me to take people prisoner. Having my stuff taken away did not teach me to steal. Having to do chores did not teach me to make slaves out of people smaller than me.



Then it is not possible to teach a kid boundaries if you are invading their space, going in their room, taking their shit.



How? If the adult is the influence.

"Well, mom took my stuff, so it is ok to take other people's stuff"



And the examples I gave were as adults.

I have never taken anyone prisoner but I was sure put in my room a lot.



A release? It is a heart wrenching decision you make after everything else has been exhausted.



I don't believe that.

Daddy would cry if he had to spank us for some reason but his reasons were always well deserving.

Myself? I was a good kid and did not do things I should not do until after my daughter was born when I was 14. I would sneak out of the house and come home drunk. He nailed my windows shut and I took the boards off. He nailed them on the outside and I had a neighborhood kid take them off.

He ran out of options.



You jump to a lot of conclusions.

I was molested by stepfather from the time I was 7 until I was 13 at which time I got pregnant and was turned over to my father after my daughter was born.

So what did I do wrong?



This is well known on this site.

My daughter is on this site and contacted me as an adult.



jaytee
by on Aug. 28, 2013 at 6:15 AM

 I am not watching it.

I just want to know who is recording this? Seriously, ugh!

laranadtony
by Ruby Member on Aug. 28, 2013 at 6:15 AM


Quoting Anonymous:

If you're so concerned, find him children who are also disabled to be friends with that way he will have someone to relate to.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Once again, yes it is sad, but the kids have no obligation to be friends with your child. They're not harassing him.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Not every child wants to be friends with your kid. If your child is more into his own world rather than the other kids, or maybe they just don't click as friends, the other kids have no obligation. Unless they are harassing your child, they're not doing anything wrong by not wanting to be his friend.

Once again, I don't think it was spanking that caused it. I don't think time out caused it. The problem with this child is not a 1 pinpointed issue, it's just his overall raising. (That includes all aspects, not JUST discipline.) They only thing I was saying about spanking is that the other woman was technically right since parents who spank were usually also spanked. 

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

There is a huge difference between that and being nasty. You give children time outs for not sharing, being bratty, throwing things, hitting, biting, etc. Children learn that these things can cause you to be excluded. (Unless you give your kids punishment for the things you described.)


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Sometimes yes, that's why these things are taught throughout childhood, to create distinctions. 


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

And what is wrong with excluding a child who is behaving nasty? When you're nice to others, they'll want to play with you. But when you're mean they don't want to play with you. 


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

She said that spanking teaches you to hit someone smaller. Since most parents who spank WERE spanked, this is actually true. Because a child is smaller and by spanking them you are hitting them.

This does not mean every punishment causes a negative behavior. We'll use a simple example, time out. Time out is actually a POSITIVE behavior that is good to instill from a young age (Even if you spank, this is still a good coping mechanism to teach.) It teaches you that it's beneficial to allow yourself to "cool off".


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Technically she's right. Most parents who spank, were spanked as children. They were taught spanking was the proper discipline to go to. When you spank, you're hitting someone smaller. 

And also, that last quote applied to her as well, (which is why I tried to explain it from both sides. Not just for or against.)  I  figured she'd see it through your's since you quoted her. 

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Honestly, it all depends on the child. Spanking didn't teach me ANYTHING, it just pissed me off. I was spanked and I was far from a behaving, good child (esp around 11-15.) For others, it taught them a lot. Just because it worked for you, and just because it didn't for me, doesn't mean that applies to other children.

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Bellarose0212:


They probably do get spanked or maybe worse. That's probably where they learned that if you're bigger, it's okay to hurt someone smaller because you can.

Quoting Anonymous:

The majority of the time I'm against spanking, but in this case I am FOR it. If you've messed your kids up this much already, you need drastic measures to fix it.


Quoting Sweetie1216:

Need their asses beat.





What a crock? You know what I learned from spanking? If you decide to misbehave, there are consequences. One of them was spanking and that was the least torturous.

Being put in my room did not teach me to take people prisoner. Having my stuff taken away did not teach me to steal. Having to do chores did not teach me to make slaves out of people smaller than me.



I find it ironic that she can say that spanking teaches you to hit someone smaller but when I say it is a crock, only then is something said.




Then every form of discipline teaches a negative behavior.



It teaches a kid to exclude others simply because he does not like what they are doing.



For a child, bad behavior would be, "You are not playing my way!"



I guess I was taught different. I was taught that you don't exclude someone because you want to play with all the red cars and they keep touching them. If you were going to play cars with them, they should have access to all the cars. Maybe they like red too.

My son was excluded because he would go off in his own little world. It was not bad behavior. 



But these kids were taught(obviously) that it was alright to exclude him based on his differences alone, which brings us back to the video. Maybe time out made them do the things they did and not spanking.



Glad to know it is ok to exclude disabled children instead of teaching your child to understand their disability.



And this is why my kids were taught that you do not exclude kids for reasons like this. You don't exclude them because they are in a wheelchair and can't run. You don't exclude them because they have a developmental delay and can't do things as good as you can.

Good grief!



You don't know much about disabled kids, do you? He has autism. It is imperative to "normalize" him as much as possible. I guess I know now why it was so hard with mothers telling their kids, "Something is wrong with him! Stay away from him!"

Don't sweat the petty things;Don't pet the sweaty things!

bleumonster
by Ruby Member on Aug. 28, 2013 at 6:16 AM
That was disturbing. It was like Lord of the Flies urban style. I couldn't always tell what they said but it was always bigger kids ganging up on little ones.
laranadtony
by Ruby Member on Aug. 28, 2013 at 6:16 AM


Quoting Anonymous:

Sucks for you. Seems like you have more issues than the way you were disciplined as a child.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Everyone always has a story.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

"I'm not saying just spanking, I'm saying physical force over all." Do you not understand that? 

And obviously you did do things you weren't supposed to do if you had a kid at 14.

I was spanked and did all kinds of shit I shouldn't have done. 


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

"Physically force is usually a release." 

Those are my exact words and yes they are true. People typically result to physical force (I'm not saying just spanking, I'm saying physical force over all) as a release. 


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Do you understand what I'm saying though? Yes, spanking does teach you to hit smaller ones.You were spanked so you spank your kids, and when you spank your kids you ARE hitting something smaller. (Not you personally, in general.) 

And the difference between grounding and spanking is that it does not result in any physical force. Physical force is usually a release. Grounding CAN be vindictive if taken to the extreme, but speaking typically it is not.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

I'm trying to word this the right way.

Okay, what I'm saying is, it DOES teach them to hit something smaller than them in their adult lives because they spank just like they were spanked.  In my original comment( about the other woman technically being right), I was speaking of them as ADULTS.

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

I think it teaches them that as a child, you do not have the same boundries as an adult. 

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Bellarose0212:

Kids learn by watching their models. It's just true. Does that mean that every kid who spanks will do this? No, I'm not saying that. But, I doubt being spanked will teach these kids anything about empathy. It will just reinforce that the person with the most power in the situation can/should do whatever they want to the person with the least power.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Bellarose0212:


They probably do get spanked or maybe worse. That's probably where they learned that if you're bigger, it's okay to hurt someone smaller because you can.

Quoting Anonymous:

The majority of the time I'm against spanking, but in this case I am FOR it. If you've messed your kids up this much already, you need drastic measures to fix it.


Quoting Sweetie1216:

Need their asses beat.





What a crock? You know what I learned from spanking? If you decide to misbehave, there are consequences. One of them was spanking and that was the least torturous.

Being put in my room did not teach me to take people prisoner. Having my stuff taken away did not teach me to steal. Having to do chores did not teach me to make slaves out of people smaller than me.



Then it is not possible to teach a kid boundaries if you are invading their space, going in their room, taking their shit.



How? If the adult is the influence.

"Well, mom took my stuff, so it is ok to take other people's stuff"



And the examples I gave were as adults.

I have never taken anyone prisoner but I was sure put in my room a lot.



A release? It is a heart wrenching decision you make after everything else has been exhausted.



I don't believe that.

Daddy would cry if he had to spank us for some reason but his reasons were always well deserving.

Myself? I was a good kid and did not do things I should not do until after my daughter was born when I was 14. I would sneak out of the house and come home drunk. He nailed my windows shut and I took the boards off. He nailed them on the outside and I had a neighborhood kid take them off.

He ran out of options.



You jump to a lot of conclusions.

I was molested by stepfather from the time I was 7 until I was 13 at which time I got pregnant and was turned over to my father after my daughter was born.

So what did I do wrong?



This is well known on this site.

My daughter is on this site and contacted me as an adult.



No, I am over my issues and you wanna know how I know?

I have no compulsion to make fun of disabled kids or sexually abused kids.

Don't sweat the petty things;Don't pet the sweaty things!

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Aug. 28, 2013 at 6:23 AM

If you read back, you never said what disorder he had. 


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

If you're so concerned, find him children who are also disabled to be friends with that way he will have someone to relate to.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Once again, yes it is sad, but the kids have no obligation to be friends with your child. They're not harassing him.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Not every child wants to be friends with your kid. If your child is more into his own world rather than the other kids, or maybe they just don't click as friends, the other kids have no obligation. Unless they are harassing your child, they're not doing anything wrong by not wanting to be his friend.

Once again, I don't think it was spanking that caused it. I don't think time out caused it. The problem with this child is not a 1 pinpointed issue, it's just his overall raising. (That includes all aspects, not JUST discipline.) They only thing I was saying about spanking is that the other woman was technically right since parents who spank were usually also spanked. 

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

There is a huge difference between that and being nasty. You give children time outs for not sharing, being bratty, throwing things, hitting, biting, etc. Children learn that these things can cause you to be excluded. (Unless you give your kids punishment for the things you described.)


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Sometimes yes, that's why these things are taught throughout childhood, to create distinctions. 


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

And what is wrong with excluding a child who is behaving nasty? When you're nice to others, they'll want to play with you. But when you're mean they don't want to play with you. 


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

She said that spanking teaches you to hit someone smaller. Since most parents who spank WERE spanked, this is actually true. Because a child is smaller and by spanking them you are hitting them.

This does not mean every punishment causes a negative behavior. We'll use a simple example, time out. Time out is actually a POSITIVE behavior that is good to instill from a young age (Even if you spank, this is still a good coping mechanism to teach.) It teaches you that it's beneficial to allow yourself to "cool off".


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Technically she's right. Most parents who spank, were spanked as children. They were taught spanking was the proper discipline to go to. When you spank, you're hitting someone smaller. 

And also, that last quote applied to her as well, (which is why I tried to explain it from both sides. Not just for or against.)  I  figured she'd see it through your's since you quoted her. 

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Honestly, it all depends on the child. Spanking didn't teach me ANYTHING, it just pissed me off. I was spanked and I was far from a behaving, good child (esp around 11-15.) For others, it taught them a lot. Just because it worked for you, and just because it didn't for me, doesn't mean that applies to other children.

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Bellarose0212:


They probably do get spanked or maybe worse. That's probably where they learned that if you're bigger, it's okay to hurt someone smaller because you can.

Quoting Anonymous:

The majority of the time I'm against spanking, but in this case I am FOR it. If you've messed your kids up this much already, you need drastic measures to fix it.


Quoting Sweetie1216:

Need their asses beat.





What a crock? You know what I learned from spanking? If you decide to misbehave, there are consequences. One of them was spanking and that was the least torturous.

Being put in my room did not teach me to take people prisoner. Having my stuff taken away did not teach me to steal. Having to do chores did not teach me to make slaves out of people smaller than me.



I find it ironic that she can say that spanking teaches you to hit someone smaller but when I say it is a crock, only then is something said.




Then every form of discipline teaches a negative behavior.



It teaches a kid to exclude others simply because he does not like what they are doing.



For a child, bad behavior would be, "You are not playing my way!"



I guess I was taught different. I was taught that you don't exclude someone because you want to play with all the red cars and they keep touching them. If you were going to play cars with them, they should have access to all the cars. Maybe they like red too.

My son was excluded because he would go off in his own little world. It was not bad behavior. 



But these kids were taught(obviously) that it was alright to exclude him based on his differences alone, which brings us back to the video. Maybe time out made them do the things they did and not spanking.



Glad to know it is ok to exclude disabled children instead of teaching your child to understand their disability.



And this is why my kids were taught that you do not exclude kids for reasons like this. You don't exclude them because they are in a wheelchair and can't run. You don't exclude them because they have a developmental delay and can't do things as good as you can.

Good grief!



You don't know much about disabled kids, do you? He has autism. It is imperative to "normalize" him as much as possible. I guess I know now why it was so hard with mothers telling their kids, "Something is wrong with him! Stay away from him!"



Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Aug. 28, 2013 at 6:23 AM
Show me where I have made fun of your child.
Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Sucks for you. Seems like you have more issues than the way you were disciplined as a child.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Everyone always has a story.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

"I'm not saying just spanking, I'm saying physical force over all." Do you not understand that? 

And obviously you did do things you weren't supposed to do if you had a kid at 14.

I was spanked and did all kinds of shit I shouldn't have done. 


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

"Physically force is usually a release." 

Those are my exact words and yes they are true. People typically result to physical force (I'm not saying just spanking, I'm saying physical force over all) as a release. 


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Do you understand what I'm saying though? Yes, spanking does teach you to hit smaller ones.You were spanked so you spank your kids, and when you spank your kids you ARE hitting something smaller. (Not you personally, in general.) 

And the difference between grounding and spanking is that it does not result in any physical force. Physical force is usually a release. Grounding CAN be vindictive if taken to the extreme, but speaking typically it is not.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

I'm trying to word this the right way.

Okay, what I'm saying is, it DOES teach them to hit something smaller than them in their adult lives because they spank just like they were spanked.  In my original comment( about the other woman technically being right), I was speaking of them as ADULTS.

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

I think it teaches them that as a child, you do not have the same boundries as an adult. 

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Bellarose0212:

Kids learn by watching their models. It's just true. Does that mean that every kid who spanks will do this? No, I'm not saying that. But, I doubt being spanked will teach these kids anything about empathy. It will just reinforce that the person with the most power in the situation can/should do whatever they want to the person with the least power.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Bellarose0212:


They probably do get spanked or maybe worse. That's probably where they learned that if you're bigger, it's okay to hurt someone smaller because you can.

Quoting Anonymous:

The majority of the time I'm against spanking, but in this case I am FOR it. If you've messed your kids up this much already, you need drastic measures to fix it.


Quoting Sweetie1216:

Need their asses beat.





What a crock? You know what I learned from spanking? If you decide to misbehave, there are consequences. One of them was spanking and that was the least torturous.

Being put in my room did not teach me to take people prisoner. Having my stuff taken away did not teach me to steal. Having to do chores did not teach me to make slaves out of people smaller than me.



Then it is not possible to teach a kid boundaries if you are invading their space, going in their room, taking their shit.



How? If the adult is the influence.

"Well, mom took my stuff, so it is ok to take other people's stuff"



And the examples I gave were as adults.

I have never taken anyone prisoner but I was sure put in my room a lot.



A release? It is a heart wrenching decision you make after everything else has been exhausted.



I don't believe that.

Daddy would cry if he had to spank us for some reason but his reasons were always well deserving.

Myself? I was a good kid and did not do things I should not do until after my daughter was born when I was 14. I would sneak out of the house and come home drunk. He nailed my windows shut and I took the boards off. He nailed them on the outside and I had a neighborhood kid take them off.

He ran out of options.



You jump to a lot of conclusions.

I was molested by stepfather from the time I was 7 until I was 13 at which time I got pregnant and was turned over to my father after my daughter was born.

So what did I do wrong?



This is well known on this site.

My daughter is on this site and contacted me as an adult.



No, I am over my issues and you wanna know how I know?

I have no compulsion to make fun of disabled kids or sexually abused kids.


laranadtony
by Ruby Member on Aug. 28, 2013 at 6:27 AM


Quoting Anonymous:

Show me where I have made fun of your child.
Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Sucks for you. Seems like you have more issues than the way you were disciplined as a child.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Everyone always has a story.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

"I'm not saying just spanking, I'm saying physical force over all." Do you not understand that? 

And obviously you did do things you weren't supposed to do if you had a kid at 14.

I was spanked and did all kinds of shit I shouldn't have done. 


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

"Physically force is usually a release." 

Those are my exact words and yes they are true. People typically result to physical force (I'm not saying just spanking, I'm saying physical force over all) as a release. 


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Do you understand what I'm saying though? Yes, spanking does teach you to hit smaller ones.You were spanked so you spank your kids, and when you spank your kids you ARE hitting something smaller. (Not you personally, in general.) 

And the difference between grounding and spanking is that it does not result in any physical force. Physical force is usually a release. Grounding CAN be vindictive if taken to the extreme, but speaking typically it is not.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

I'm trying to word this the right way.

Okay, what I'm saying is, it DOES teach them to hit something smaller than them in their adult lives because they spank just like they were spanked.  In my original comment( about the other woman technically being right), I was speaking of them as ADULTS.

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

I think it teaches them that as a child, you do not have the same boundries as an adult. 

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Bellarose0212:

Kids learn by watching their models. It's just true. Does that mean that every kid who spanks will do this? No, I'm not saying that. But, I doubt being spanked will teach these kids anything about empathy. It will just reinforce that the person with the most power in the situation can/should do whatever they want to the person with the least power.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Bellarose0212:


They probably do get spanked or maybe worse. That's probably where they learned that if you're bigger, it's okay to hurt someone smaller because you can.

Quoting Anonymous:

The majority of the time I'm against spanking, but in this case I am FOR it. If you've messed your kids up this much already, you need drastic measures to fix it.


Quoting Sweetie1216:

Need their asses beat.





What a crock? You know what I learned from spanking? If you decide to misbehave, there are consequences. One of them was spanking and that was the least torturous.

Being put in my room did not teach me to take people prisoner. Having my stuff taken away did not teach me to steal. Having to do chores did not teach me to make slaves out of people smaller than me.



Then it is not possible to teach a kid boundaries if you are invading their space, going in their room, taking their shit.



How? If the adult is the influence.

"Well, mom took my stuff, so it is ok to take other people's stuff"



And the examples I gave were as adults.

I have never taken anyone prisoner but I was sure put in my room a lot.



A release? It is a heart wrenching decision you make after everything else has been exhausted.



I don't believe that.

Daddy would cry if he had to spank us for some reason but his reasons were always well deserving.

Myself? I was a good kid and did not do things I should not do until after my daughter was born when I was 14. I would sneak out of the house and come home drunk. He nailed my windows shut and I took the boards off. He nailed them on the outside and I had a neighborhood kid take them off.

He ran out of options.



You jump to a lot of conclusions.

I was molested by stepfather from the time I was 7 until I was 13 at which time I got pregnant and was turned over to my father after my daughter was born.

So what did I do wrong?



This is well known on this site.

My daughter is on this site and contacted me as an adult.



No, I am over my issues and you wanna know how I know?

I have no compulsion to make fun of disabled kids or sexually abused kids.


You said it was fine for him to be excluded. That is what happened to the little girl in the very post you started with.

Don't sweat the petty things;Don't pet the sweaty things!

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Aug. 28, 2013 at 6:32 AM

No, I said it's sad but that the kids have no obligation to be friends with him as long as they aren't harassing him. That goes for every child, disabled or not. The child in the video is being harrassed and hit.

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Show me where I have made fun of your child.
Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Sucks for you. Seems like you have more issues than the way you were disciplined as a child.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Everyone always has a story.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

"I'm not saying just spanking, I'm saying physical force over all." Do you not understand that? 

And obviously you did do things you weren't supposed to do if you had a kid at 14.

I was spanked and did all kinds of shit I shouldn't have done. 


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

"Physically force is usually a release." 

Those are my exact words and yes they are true. People typically result to physical force (I'm not saying just spanking, I'm saying physical force over all) as a release. 


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

Do you understand what I'm saying though? Yes, spanking does teach you to hit smaller ones.You were spanked so you spank your kids, and when you spank your kids you ARE hitting something smaller. (Not you personally, in general.) 

And the difference between grounding and spanking is that it does not result in any physical force. Physical force is usually a release. Grounding CAN be vindictive if taken to the extreme, but speaking typically it is not.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

I'm trying to word this the right way.

Okay, what I'm saying is, it DOES teach them to hit something smaller than them in their adult lives because they spank just like they were spanked.  In my original comment( about the other woman technically being right), I was speaking of them as ADULTS.

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Anonymous:

I think it teaches them that as a child, you do not have the same boundries as an adult. 

Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Bellarose0212:

Kids learn by watching their models. It's just true. Does that mean that every kid who spanks will do this? No, I'm not saying that. But, I doubt being spanked will teach these kids anything about empathy. It will just reinforce that the person with the most power in the situation can/should do whatever they want to the person with the least power.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting Bellarose0212:


They probably do get spanked or maybe worse. That's probably where they learned that if you're bigger, it's okay to hurt someone smaller because you can.

Quoting Anonymous:

The majority of the time I'm against spanking, but in this case I am FOR it. If you've messed your kids up this much already, you need drastic measures to fix it.


Quoting Sweetie1216:

Need their asses beat.





What a crock? You know what I learned from spanking? If you decide to misbehave, there are consequences. One of them was spanking and that was the least torturous.

Being put in my room did not teach me to take people prisoner. Having my stuff taken away did not teach me to steal. Having to do chores did not teach me to make slaves out of people smaller than me.



Then it is not possible to teach a kid boundaries if you are invading their space, going in their room, taking their shit.



How? If the adult is the influence.

"Well, mom took my stuff, so it is ok to take other people's stuff"



And the examples I gave were as adults.

I have never taken anyone prisoner but I was sure put in my room a lot.



A release? It is a heart wrenching decision you make after everything else has been exhausted.



I don't believe that.

Daddy would cry if he had to spank us for some reason but his reasons were always well deserving.

Myself? I was a good kid and did not do things I should not do until after my daughter was born when I was 14. I would sneak out of the house and come home drunk. He nailed my windows shut and I took the boards off. He nailed them on the outside and I had a neighborhood kid take them off.

He ran out of options.



You jump to a lot of conclusions.

I was molested by stepfather from the time I was 7 until I was 13 at which time I got pregnant and was turned over to my father after my daughter was born.

So what did I do wrong?



This is well known on this site.

My daughter is on this site and contacted me as an adult.



No, I am over my issues and you wanna know how I know?

I have no compulsion to make fun of disabled kids or sexually abused kids.


You said it was fine for him to be excluded. That is what happened to the little girl in the very post you started with.



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