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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

... well ... we warned him ... - update

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

Yesterday, we were visiting with my family. SS, who is six, saw a show about ghosts (I think it was called The Haunted) and begged DH to watch it.

DH finally told him that he could watch it if he wanted, but even if he got scared, he'd still have to sleep alone in his room (which is upstairs on the landing). He watched less than ten minutes of it before he asked us to switch to cartoons.

DH has been out all day enjoying the holiday with my family. I went by to see my family, and DH was sound asleep (partly due to beer, sun, and his 60 hour work week). I got DH home and he was asleep before his head hit the pillow. I got SS in bed, but as soon as I got downstairs he started calling for me.

He said he was scared and asked me to get DH. I told him that DH was already asleep. He started wailing that he watched a scary movie and now he's scared.

I told him I was sorry that he was scared, but reminded him that he begged and begged and begged to watch the show. I reminded him that we told him he would have to sleep in his own bed. I turned on his closet light, gave him an extra stuffed animal, and turned on the hall bathroom light, but he started crying again when I came downstairs.

I feel bad for leaving him alone when he's scared, but we did tell him that he'd still have to sleep alone. What would you do in this situation?

ETA : *I* did not let him watch the show. DH made that call.

 

update :

You guys make me laugh. You act like I told him, ‘by the way there's a soul sucking demon in your closet ... Sweet dreams!' No. I made sure he was comfortable, I gave him extra stuffed animals to sleep with, and I made sure he had plenty of light. I didn't cruelly say, ‘tough shit kid, deal with it.' However, I did remind him that it was a tv show that he thought he could handle and next time he would need to remember how those kind of shows make him feel.

For everyone saying that I should be pissed at DH, I don't see why. While I personally would have been more adamant that he not watch the show, it was a decision that was left up to DH. I love SS, but raising him is a job left to DH and BM. I will enforce their rules and follow their punishment, but I leave decisions making up to them - especially when it's a controversial decision.    

For everyone saying that they would never give into their children, it must be wonderful to be a perfect parent. Since you've never given in to begging, not even once, we should give you all an award. Personally, I believe kids should be given some freedom. Why fight and argue all evening? Why put SS in timeout for arguing and deal with an upset kid for the rest of the evening? SS was the only person having to deal with the effects of watching the show and if he thought he could handle it, why not let him give it a try?

I think you guys are selling your kids short. You don't let your kids take any chances and you try to justify it by saying ‘they are x age'. SS may be six, but he's a sharp kid. He knows the difference between tv and reality. I don't ever think children are ever too young to learn that actions have consequences: eating too many strawberries will make you sick, sliding around on the hardwoods in your socks can cause you to fall, and watching a scary tv show may keep you up at night. 

For the record, SS was asleep in minutes. He didn't wake up in the middle of the night. He didn't have nightmares. He woke up this morning and is doing wonderfully.

Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 31, 2013 at 11:07 PM
Replies (41-50):
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Aug. 31, 2013 at 11:26 PM

No it wasn't but your mom and its your duty to nurture and comfort. Step mom or mom your the nurturer and he is scared so remember the feeling and try to ease his fear. I say this because I was always scared as a child and its reality to them movie or not its real and he is scared.

Quoting Anonymous:

I don't know why you put mom in parentheses. I assume it was to be insulting and to insinuate that I'm not his mom, which is correct.

Quoting Anonymous:

Remember how you have felt when you have been scared and times that by a whole bunch and get your ass in there until he falls asleep "mom"


Wonderlust
by Silver Member on Aug. 31, 2013 at 11:28 PM

I'd wake my husband up and let him deal with the mess he made. 6 is way way too young for scary movies. I fuss at my six year old for trying to be sneaky and watch goosebumps on Netflix. She's like her mom and love scary stuff. But I don't want to deal with the fall out.

bahamamama61
by Silver Member on Aug. 31, 2013 at 11:32 PM
I would let him sleep with me, or I would sleep in his room:) There is no way I would leave him in his room, alone and scared:/
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Elle.tea.22
by Ruby Member on Aug. 31, 2013 at 11:32 PM
It was his dads call so what he says goes.
morrigan914
by Platinum Member on Aug. 31, 2013 at 11:36 PM
My ex let our daughter watch all kinds of stuff way younger then 6. Actually, at about 2 she rolled her eyes at me and told me "Monsters aren't really Mommy, monsters are only in movies." Depends on the child.

Quoting Wonderlust:

I'd wake my husband up and let him deal with the mess he made. 6 is way way too young for scary movies. I fuss at my six year old for trying to be sneaky and watch goosebumps on Netflix. She's like her mom and love scary stuff. But I don't want to deal with the fall out.

Benjamins-mama
by Platinum Member on Aug. 31, 2013 at 11:37 PM

I wouldn't have let him watch the show no matter how much he wanted to.   

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Aug. 31, 2013 at 11:40 PM
A 6 year old isn't really old enough to understand the consequences of watching a scary show. He should have just been told no to begin with, but seeing as how dad let him watch it, I would have stayed to calm him down regardless what dad did. I can't walk out on a scared little kid.
wiccania
by Bronze Member on Aug. 31, 2013 at 11:48 PM

I would have done the same thing you did.  Maybe that makes me a bitch, but that's how my mom handled it when I was even younger than taht and I wasn't damaged by it.  I learned to cope.  If you really feel terrible, you can go in and comfort him for a few minutes and remind him that it wasn't real, but I wouldn't do more than that.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Aug. 31, 2013 at 11:54 PM
That's what my parents did, too.

SS fell asleep within minutes. I tried to wake up DH, who is out like a light, and by the time I came back to the living room he was quite. I've been sitting on the couch for a while just making sure he's really asleep, but now that I'm sure he's sleeping, I'm putting my booty in bed.

Quoting wiccania:

I would have done the same thing you did.  Maybe that makes me a bitch, but that's how my mom handled it when I was even younger than taht and I wasn't damaged by it.  I learned to cope.  If you really feel terrible, you can go in and comfort him for a few minutes and remind him that it wasn't real, but I wouldn't do more than that.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Sep. 1, 2013 at 12:33 AM

 If you knew it wasn't a movie for a six year old to watch then don't let him watch the movie.He is six years old not 12.

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