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Do you find it difficult to co-parent with your ex?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 50 Replies

I do not wish to be friends with my ex-husband, nor do I want to speak with him. I want to keep the co-parenting at a minimum, which consist of only speaking with him in regards to the children's education and anything medical related.

I feel that my children are at an age where they are fully capable of speaking up for themselves if they want or need something from their father. They are all teenagers and they stay with him half the time. I am so sick and tired of hearing people say "The two of you have to get along for the children's sake".

No we don't!! This man has made everything in my life difficult for me. Now that he has someone in his life, he wants to act decent towards me. Well guess what, it's too fucking late.

I don't bad mouth him to my kids. I just chose not to answer his text messages or phone calls when it has nothing to do with my kids schooling or anything medical related or when he is asking me for money to help out with the kids.

Are there any Moms out there who find it impossible to co-parent with your ex?

Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 2, 2013 at 6:37 PM
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Replies (1-10):
KyliesMom5
by Gold Member on Sep. 2, 2013 at 6:47 PM

 My ex, has tried to make my life hell.  In the beginning, he would tell me that he wanted to be able to co-parent. Which was a joke to start with since he'd had no interest in parenting to start with. He is a smooth talker and will say anything to get you to do things his way.  He made co-parenting very difficult when we first splint so I stopped trying. I refuse to listen to his excuses, lies and just plain Bull Shit. I will talk to him when it is absolutely necessary but other then that forget it.

He gets mad because I don't fall for his BS anymore and won't easily agree to things. But he blew it. He is constantly trying to turn things around on me and make me out to be the bad guy. 

I feel pretty pathetic sometimes because I fell for this guy. I was to blind to see the red flags and whats worse I stayed married to him for 10 years. 

I don't talk bad about him around my daughter but I don't have to she sees right through him.

camocountrymom
by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 7:06 PM
2 moms liked this
Yes I hate it. Most people want their kids to take their time growing up. I, on the other hand, can't wait til dd turns 18 just so I don't have to deal with so much bullshit from the ex.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Sep. 3, 2013 at 10:01 AM

BUMP!

MrsDavidB25
by Stacey on Sep. 3, 2013 at 10:03 AM

 Not at all. We have always done what's best for the kids. Never followed any sort of ridgid visitation schedule, he sees them whenever he can, we trade off holidays if the other wants to make special plans/trips, and we have both helped each other out when necessary.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Sep. 3, 2013 at 10:05 AM

Nope... my ex is not involved in how our son is raised. he chooses not to contact us so he does not get an ounce of effort from me anymore to get him to have a relationship with D. It's better actually. I do not have to worry about over stepping boundaries. Me and Dh are his only parental figures and he does not get mixed signals from other sources.

lnrmom
by Ruby Member on Sep. 3, 2013 at 10:07 AM

I do not coparent with my kids fathers. We do not talk. Outside of child support review (which he asked for, and ended up doubling his payments - dumb a$$), I haven't heard his voice in at least 10 years. Even during the phone call during court his voice had me so angry I was shaking. Today is my oldest's 17th birthday. Her sperm donor had the gall to post on a picture of her I posted that my youngest found of her on her 2nd birthday. It was nice and all, but it was like he was trying to say "yeah, I did that". No. You donated the sperm to make her. You haven't done anything in the raising of her, and rarely pay anything in child support. Shut. Up.

Neither of them live in the same state. I have full time custody of both of my girls. I make all decisions. Only time I willingly contact them is if we move or if contact numbers change. The girls have their own cell phones, the numbers have been shared. What they do with that information is on them. Only reason oldest's dad is on my FB is so he can see pictures of her. I don't care about anything else. Youngest's dad gets any and all info from either them directly or his mother/sister.

tarakay0417
by on Sep. 3, 2013 at 10:09 AM
My oldest son's father left when I was pregnant. Then when ds was 7 decided to be a father, took me to court to have visitation, then 2 years later has decided to sign his rights away and now my dh is adopting ds. For the 2 years we Co-parented it was difficult.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Sep. 3, 2013 at 10:16 AM

YES!! My ex is a sociopath, narcissistic looser who lies about me to the kids and others.  My kids will leave my house w/love in their heart for me and come back w/hate in their eyes - it takes about two days for things to get back to normal until they go back to his house.  He has them one night a week and every other weekend.  Same goes for the text and phone calls, I thought he would change once he got a new flavor of the month to keep him busy but NOPE - I feel ya, I really really do!!  he will play the "victim" in Court, to family and friends, etc....

davnrori
by Gold Member on Sep. 3, 2013 at 10:29 AM

 I have tried my hardest to effectively co-parent with my ex but have gotten nothing but trouble in return. No matter how much I give or compromise, I get nothing from him. He has shown himself over the years to be completely unable to act in the interest of our child unless it benefits him in some way. He doesn't ask, he demands. If his demands aren't met, he calls me up and screams at me until I hang up on him. He has repeatedly used the threat of taking me to court to get me to acquiesce to his demands. I have sole physical custody of our daughter and have had this since shortly after our divorce. However, he has very generous visitation- Every school break longer than 5 days, every other Christmas break, and all summer. We live in different states but I live near his family so he also demands to see DD every time he is in town regardless of whether it is during his vistation time or whether my family has plans that include DD. We are going to court on the 19th because I refused to let him have DD during the school year this year. He wanted to flip our custody agreement where I had her during the summer and he had her during the school year because he is tired of driving to get her, it's a 16hr round trip drive for him, when he has visitation. He told me that it was my turn to do the driving. I can't wait to crush him and I am tired of giving him everything he wants just because he thinks that the threat of court will make me give him his way.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Sep. 3, 2013 at 1:17 PM

BUMP!

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