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Birth mothers- do you think they should be able to change their minds?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 179 Replies

A friend of mine gave up a son at birth 10 years ago. She regrets it completely, and thinks she should have had a YEAR to change her mind. She said she did at 6 months, but the adoption was final.

I think that's insane. Do you think birth mothers should have so long to change their minds?

Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 2, 2013 at 11:56 PM
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Replies (1-10):
svolkov
by on Sep. 2, 2013 at 11:59 PM
1 mom liked this
Not that long. But id say 3-6 mo at least. Hell i can return my damn phone within 90 days if i change my mind. It would be horrible for thebadoptive family but pregnancy hormones/being scared etc can lead to bad decisions, something that life altering should be carefully considered
justinnaimee
by Ruby Member on Sep. 3, 2013 at 12:01 AM
I'm pretty sure most adoptions take around 90 days to finalize. Until its finalized bm can change her mind.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Sep. 3, 2013 at 12:01 AM
7 moms liked this

Technically, they have 3 months to change their minds but I don't think they should have that long.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Sep. 3, 2013 at 12:03 AM
7 moms liked this

No. Nobody would want to adopt if that was the case.  Who wants to run the risk of ending up heartbroken and feeling used and abused as an unpaid babysitter basically.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Sep. 3, 2013 at 12:04 AM
1 mom liked this

I'd 6 months would be a good time frame.

sugarcrisp
by Ruby Member on Sep. 3, 2013 at 12:04 AM

Agreed.


Quoting Anonymous:

Technically, they have 3 months to change their minds but I don't think they should have that long.



PumpkinSpice8
by Gold Member on Sep. 3, 2013 at 12:06 AM
No, I don't feel they should get to change their minds. 90 days even seems like a lot of time for them to change their mind, IMO.
BethanyJ
by Silver Member on Sep. 3, 2013 at 12:06 AM

 I think that at the minimum open adoptions should be 100% legally enforceable and that across that board birthmothers should have at least 6 weeks to change their minds, no questions asked.  I think that's long enough to be fair to vulnerable young women and to potential adoptive parents.  After that, I think that mother should only be able to get the kids back if they can prove they were forced or coerced into signing papers.  

Kazoo22
by Platinum Member on Sep. 3, 2013 at 12:09 AM

Three months is a long time in term of babies. If they can't make up their mind by then they have no one to blame but themselves. 

TableforSeven
by Ruby Member on Sep. 3, 2013 at 12:10 AM

I do think that birth moms shoul have enough time to really think things over....and for their hormones to readjust after giving birth....before any adoption can be final.  I think 6 months should be the limit though-not a full year.

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