Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

My son's teacher is bad at communicating

Posted by   + Show Post
My son started kindergarten this year. He loves it and so far we've been happy with the school and his teacher.

Theres only one thing: shes REALLY bad at communicating.

The school has this disciplinary system where the kids start out at expected behavior. Then they can go up on level for going above and beyond. No examples of that are given. On the other a side they can go down FIVE levels.

Level One is a "warning"
Level Two is removing them from the situation
Level Three is "relflection" and we have no idea what that is. I'm assuming they miss recess or something.
Level Four is contacting a guardian
Level Five is a visit with am administrator.

My son got level 1 the first two days of this week. The first day we asked what happened and of course his view was very one sided. The teacher didnt send home a note and he said he was the only kid to get a level.

The next day he said he couldnt remember why he got a level and there was no note from the teacher.

So I emailed her and she said "he should be able to tell you." Um okay. He should but he's not for whatever reason.

Idk. I just think its strange that they feel he acted in a way that warranted having his behavior classified as "level one" but they dont feel the need to specify what the behavior IS.

I would think they would want me to know what was going on at home so we could work on it and follow up with him.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Sep. 6, 2013 at 8:00 AM
Replies (71-80):
RiotousDigits
by Ruby Member on Sep. 6, 2013 at 9:34 AM


How do you know he was the "only one"?

Quoting spooky415:

First of all she has 12 kids. Out of those 12 kids, mine was the only one that had an issue.

The first day, I didn't care. I wasn't worried. But two days in a row? Yeah. Im a little concerned.

Its not that I dont think she cant handle it-its that she shouldn't HAVE to handle it on her own. If theres an issue with behavior, I want to know so I can stop it from happening again and prevent a problem BEFORE it occurs. 
ambitious_MOM
by Bronze Member on Sep. 6, 2013 at 9:34 AM
Exactly....


Quoting alisheamonet33:

yea she should tell you so you can talk to your son to see why he is doing what ever and  talk abt it.


SaraBethKY
by Gold Member on Sep. 6, 2013 at 9:36 AM

Honestly, some days I had a very hard time remembering why certain students pulled cards. When parents would ask me at the end of the day sometimes my answer really was "I don't actually remember" When you have so many students you can't always remember each child that didn't sit down/stop talking/follow directions all day when you are trying to keep your mind on teaching. For those students who were chronic card pullers I had them start writing down what each card was for. I know for K they probably can't do that, but from a teacher's perspective, with my mind on so many other things, it truly was hard to remember sometimes. 

siennasmamma
by Gold Member on Sep. 6, 2013 at 9:38 AM
1 mom liked this

That's not right, and she should certainly know better. He is 5. I'm pretty sure a 5 year old that can come home from school and give their parents a detailed description of why they got in trouble and what needs to be worked on is rare.

Now that I think about it, she may not have even explained it to him. If she's bad at communicating with you, there's a good chance she's bad at communicating with the students. Meaning telling them what they did wrong, why they got "level one" and how to do better next time.

Anyway, I'd email her again.

o0gone0o
by Silver Member on Sep. 6, 2013 at 9:41 AM

Well depending  on why  he thinks he  got the warning perhaps just reinforce that he shouldn't do that in the future. My kindergartener came home the other day i could tell he was upset about something I'm guessing he was given a warning and its only day6 today so  probably day 3 that it happened. He's speech delayed and I was able to tell he was upset because he didn't listen as well as he should have. And he didnt want to be a bad boy, so I reminded him we all make mistakes  sometimes, and to just listen better tomorrow. He was satisfied with that and he hasn't had any more issues.

RiotousDigits
by Ruby Member on Sep. 6, 2013 at 9:45 AM

You need to remember that it takes 4-6 weeks for students to get really settled into their routine.  The teacher is "breaking them in" and probably won't even care about any of this until it becomes HABITUAL.  I would step back and give her a couple weeks.  LET HER DO HER JOB.  She'll let you know when she has a concern.

Also, I GUARANTEE you, your son is NOT the "only one" having an issue transitioning into school.  Take 2 steps back and let her do her thing.  This takes time and you crawling up her ass isn't helping.  Also, don't push your son.  Instead of badgering him about what he did wrong (he probably doesn't even remember) ask what HE remembers the teacher saying about positive behavior.  reinforce the positive.

L202M
by on Sep. 6, 2013 at 9:46 AM
1 mom liked this

This is what I thought too.  A level one is probably so insignificant, that you really wouldn't remember that minor offense.  A teacher can't take time to document every little thing that happens, yet she does need to set boundaries and nip bad behaviors in the bud, so there is bound to be times when she doesn't remember. 

It's really not a "communication" problem.  If the 5 year old got a level 1, then he should have remembered it because, to him, it would have been a big deal.


Quoting SaraBethKY:

Honestly, some days I had a very hard time remembering why certain students pulled cards. When parents would ask me at the end of the day sometimes my answer really was "I don't actually remember" When you have so many students you can't always remember each child that didn't sit down/stop talking/follow directions all day when you are trying to keep your mind on teaching. For those students who were chronic card pullers I had them start writing down what each card was for. I know for K they probably can't do that, but from a teacher's perspective, with my mind on so many other things, it truly was hard to remember sometimes. 



MommyO2-6631
by Silver Member on Sep. 6, 2013 at 9:47 AM
Our school uses this system too and i hated it. They had a colored mark in their agenda every day. Purple/blue meant he was good all day. Green meant he was in trouble once. Yellow meant twice. Orange three. Red four. Black five. He would come home with green marks a lot but when I would ask he would say IDK. I asked the teacher and she said going down a level could be anything from disrupting the class to hitting another student....

Ok teacher but I would love to know when he is beating up other children on the play ground please!!!!

But evidently this is a normal system for K-1st grades.
MommyO2-6631
by Silver Member on Sep. 6, 2013 at 9:50 AM
What would you consider a chronic card puller? My son would have to pull a car once maybe twice a week until around March... normal? The teacher did state that offenses can range from not doing work to hitting another child so I'm not 100% what these "offenses" were.


Quoting SaraBethKY:

Honestly, some days I had a very hard time remembering why certain students pulled cards. When parents would ask me at the end of the day sometimes my answer really was "I don't actually remember" When you have so many students you can't always remember each child that didn't sit down/stop talking/follow directions all day when you are trying to keep your mind on teaching. For those students who were chronic card pullers I had them start writing down what each card was for. I know for K they probably can't do that, but from a teacher's perspective, with my mind on so many other things, it truly was hard to remember sometimes. 


imissmydad51
by on Sep. 6, 2013 at 9:50 AM

You need to hear both sides of the story. Since your son won't tell you, nor the teacher then how are you to correct the issue? Ugh. Annoying fixing something you know nothing about. good luck.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN