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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Disowning a adult child?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 30 Replies
Have any of you ever distance yourself from one of your adult children?

I have four children and my oldest now 22, has really always been very mean....disturbed....violent ..and just miserable. She was placed in therapy for years. I often feel I have to walk on egg shells around her just to keep peace. I love her..but she makes my life miserable when she is having her episodes and is around me. My other kids are normal.
She is on her own and she is like bi polar and doesn't stay on meds.
I've come to a point where I see no positives being around her. She is a negative force around the other younger kids.
I feel gulity..but feel the need to protect myself and do not want her around her younger siblings.
I love her..but don't want her around when she is screaming cursing and dumping on me. She has told me I am a horrible mom....abusive mom..and every curse word in the book.
She also has a baby that I helped her with for two years. He stayed with me 10 hours a day five days a week. She now often uses him as leverage. He is 2.5 now and she is becoming to firm with him.
I'm just done. I easier her put up with her for years. I don't want her around me.
Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 15, 2013 at 7:07 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Sep. 15, 2013 at 7:12 AM
1 mom liked this
I have a grown daughter and would never disown her no matter what because she'll always be my baby. Instead I would give her the space she needs to grow and learn and pray for her everyday.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Sep. 15, 2013 at 7:14 AM
I do pray for her. I don't think having her in my life is healthy. She has been so abusive.

Quoting Anonymous:

I have a grown daughter and would never disown her no matter what because she'll always be my baby. Instead I would give her the space she needs to grow and learn and pray for her everyday.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Sep. 15, 2013 at 7:19 AM
god helps those who help them selves Ypur a good mother and u have done ur best
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Sep. 15, 2013 at 7:19 AM
2 moms liked this

I have a bi-polar family member and it is not easy by any means.Yet they need you more than you know.If you cant deal with your child think about your grandchild too?

I could never leave my child on the floor.You are all they have.

Join a support group called NAMI...naional alliance of mental illness.You are not alone and neither should your daughter be.

Please get help for your family.....giving up should never be an option.Your post was just what I needed to get out of my anger at my bipolar family member.

I will never leave them on the floor to die alone.

iamcafemom83
by Ruby Member on Sep. 15, 2013 at 7:21 AM
1 mom liked this
No adult children but I was going to say if she doesmt take care of herself by skipping meds, I would put distance, but she has a child.
You need to be there for that baby.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Sep. 15, 2013 at 7:23 AM
She started telling him to call me nana bitch;( I just can't do this again

Quoting iamcafemom83:

No adult children but I was going to say if she doesmt take care of herself by skipping meds, I would put distance, but she has a child.

You need to be there for that baby.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Sep. 15, 2013 at 7:25 AM
Like I said, give her the space she needs meaning leave her alone. Disowning her would be extreme like forever.

Quoting Anonymous:

I do pray for her. I don't think having her in my life is healthy. She has been so abusive.



Quoting Anonymous:

I have a grown daughter and would never disown her no matter what because she'll always be my baby. Instead I would give her the space she needs to grow and learn and pray for her everyday.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Sep. 15, 2013 at 7:27 AM
My dad disowned my brother. Among other things he abused me sexually. He slso did drugs, stole from us, broke my parents marriage, approached my mom sexually, lied consistently, was violent, etc. My dad got tired of his abuse and when my brother was around 28 he disowned him. I dont think its the ideal thing to do but it allowed our family to heal and move on. Its our right to be happy. No parent should have to suffer in the hands of their child much less an adult one. Dad is getting older but enjoying life like he never did before. Btw we wish his the best but he is not missed at all by us.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Sep. 15, 2013 at 7:28 AM
She has a husband. I have been to a few meetings when she was younger. I've paid for years of therapy and recently took her to a clinic for meds. She stopped taking them again. I have other children that need their mom healthy. She needs to make efforts for herself and her son.
I will not allow her to call me names infront of my children...I just won't

Quoting Anonymous:

I have a bi-polar family member and it is not easy by any means.Yet they need you more than you know.If you cant deal with your child think about your grandchild too?


I could never leave my child on the floor.You are all they have.


Join a support group called NAMI...naional alliance of mental illness.You are not alone and neither should your daughter be.


Please get help for your family.....giving up should never be an option.Your post was just what I needed to get out of my anger at my bipolar family member.


I will never leave them on the floor to die alone.

iamcafemom83
by Ruby Member on Sep. 15, 2013 at 7:29 AM
That is awful. :( I think you need to leave the limes of communication open for him.

Quoting Anonymous:

She started telling him to call me nana bitch;( I just can't do this again



Quoting iamcafemom83:

No adult children but I was going to say if she doesmt take care of herself by skipping meds, I would put distance, but she has a child.


You need to be there for that baby.
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