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What we did when our 15 year old got pregnant...my confession

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
We always had the "perfect" family. I married my husband at 23, we had our daughter at 26 and life was good. We were well off and living life! That was until our 15 year old daughter got pregnant with her boyfriend of only 2 weeks. We were devastated. We had an image to uphold. We were active members in church, dd's school and sports, golf, our neighborhood, etc. The thought of going on with our normal life while toting around a pregnant 15 year old sounded like my own personal hell.

So we sent her to Washington state to live with my parents. They live in small town and she was homeschooled there by my mother who is a retired school teacher.

We told everyone that she had gotten a opportunity to be an intern at my childhood friend's dentist office. She told all of her friends that too. So off to grandma's she went. When the 6 months were up she still hadnt had the baby yet(she was 8 months by then) so as far as everyone else knew; she was enjoying herself in Washington and decided to stay another month.

All this time we are boasting to our friends about adopting. We tell them we've been trying to adopt for 3 years now but after being let down so much we didn't want to mention anything but we had a really good feeling about "this lady" so we just had to share the news.

On June 30th dd gave birth to a little girl that she named Skylee Marie. Two weeks later we drove to Washington to pick them up. When we got home we started the legal procedures. Dd signed over her rights and since she never even told her ex boyfriend she was pregnant there were no problems there.

We were now the parents of a baby girl whom we named Lucy Caroline. Dd started back at school in September and loved Lucy like the little sister she was. I was happy, my husband was happy, and our daughters were happy.

Lucy is now 3 and dd1 just started college. I'm a stay at home mom and feel very blessed that things turned out the way they did.

There is my confession. I've never told anyone except my family in Washington--dh's parents for even know. I know I will be called a troll countless times but I'm not. I just wanted to get that out.
Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 16, 2013 at 4:04 PM
Replies (771-780):
Mummy2Connor
by Karissa on Sep. 27, 2013 at 2:15 AM
That is not how I would have handled it, but everybody would act differently in that situation. We all choose the path that is best for us.

This sounds like the story of my stepmom. Her mom was very young when she was born, so her grandparents adopted her. She grew up thinking her grandparents where actually her parents, and that her mom was her big sister.
pookiward
by on Sep. 27, 2013 at 2:24 AM
1 mom liked this
If you and op are examples I think I'll stay as far away from this christian bs as I can!


Quoting areles:


anyone simple-minded enough to judge an entire group of people based on the actions of two doesn't have an opinion worth considering in the first place.


Quoting Anonymous:

You give Christians a bad name





greywitchoregon
by on Sep. 27, 2013 at 2:31 AM

You do what you've got to do. Are you going to tell Lucy the truth? Or let her think that her mom is her sister her entire life? Sounds like a movie I watched once. Girl got pregnant, didnt want to give the baby up so mom pretended it was her baby, but the truth came out eventually. And in most states if the father doesnt participate in her life no problems.. But what if one day that he sees his child on facebook. He can hire a lawyer and get his child.. Why? Because he wasnt notified of the procedure... Montana has this neat law in which a father must fill out a putative father registry if he knows he fathered a child and since he wasnt notified.. HE CAN SUE YOU FOR HIS CHILD...

pookiward
by on Sep. 27, 2013 at 2:32 AM
I'm from SC too.and that is sad about Baby Veronica.


Quoting laranadtony:


Quoting LAXmom21:

 In most states of the father finds out he can protest, even if it is years later. Everything comes out in the wash.


 


Quoting laranadtony:




Quoting LAXmom21:


 HE will understand if you do it for the right reasons. But to do it for your "image" or to protect your "social status" is awful.


Quoting Anonymous:

They did what was best for the baby and her daughter, that's all that matters. somehow I think God would understand. SMH


Quoting phantomphan:

But ..... they had an IMAGE!!!!





*eye roll*





Quoting Louweezymarie:


Active members in a church, yet lying to everyone about where your daughter "really" is. Nice.


 


I am not sure about the OP's state but if the father finds out, the adoption is not legal and he can protest it. How is a 5 or 6 year old going to feel about that?


 

I live in SC and that shit that is going on here is a travesty.

Nikki Haley is a bitch or that is how she is seen here in SC by a lot of people. 

Do you think this little girl(here in SC) is not going to remember all this shit? SC to the reservation, back to SC? It is going to fuck her up!


greywitchoregon
by on Sep. 27, 2013 at 2:33 AM

You're lucky washington doesnt have it, but does your state have it?

http://www.courts.state.nh.us/probate/registrylist.pdf

You cannot go by washington law if you live in another state

kyona_malone
by on Sep. 27, 2013 at 2:36 AM
2013 parent of the year award goes to........(drum roll please)......... Not you! Ok, that was rude but Honestly children should be taught to take care of their own responsibilities not try to cover them up. How else are they going to ever learn how to deal with difficult situations unless you allow them to experience things? IMO you help your child as much as possible but the bed they make is the one they must lay in...
Anonymous
by Anonymous 162 on Sep. 27, 2013 at 3:14 AM

You know so many are going "The father ,the father had a right to know!" When if we are being blunt and honest about it. He most likely would have steped out anyway. If she had gotten an abortion then its all good and he has no say in it. Acting like its the end of the world. Even though both these children are happy and healthy. Also how exactly is he going to find out? How is the child going to find out? They arent unless someone tell them. Which is not my choice nor yours to make. She didnt tell the father but neither did her daughter. So should we condem the daughter for not telling him as well?

They are not the first to even make this choice. And how do YOU know that the child will end up messed up? Can you see the future? Do you know all? No. You do not. Im glad things worked out for this family. I am glad the oldest is in college and hope she is doing what she loves. I hope the youngest knows that no matter what happens she was very much loved and wanted in her family. And that she to will go on to do what she loves and have a happy life.

sha_lyn68
by Platinum Member on Sep. 27, 2013 at 8:31 AM


Quoting greywitchoregon:

You're lucky washington doesnt have it, but does your state have it?

http://www.courts.state.nh.us/probate/registrylist.pdf

You cannot go by washington law if you live in another state

Her daughter was living in WA at the time the baby was born.

areles
by on Sep. 27, 2013 at 11:32 AM
I'm an atheist.


Quoting pookiward:If you and op are examples I think I'll stay as far away from this christian bs as I can!


Quoting areles:anyone simple-minded enough to judge an entire group of people based on the actions of two doesn't have an opinion worth considering in the first place.
Quoting Anonymous:You give Christians a bad name


SamanthaSage
by on Sep. 27, 2013 at 12:36 PM
I think you should have worried less about your "imagine" and more about your daughter's feelings. The father also has a right to know he has a daughter out there somewhere.
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