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Yes my child has ODD

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

Yes it is a real disorder. 

and NO, if you do not have a child or you don't have this disorder then you do not know what you are talking about. I don't care if you have a sibiling, a friend who has a child, or a cousin, who has this disorder. You do not know anything about it if you have not personally dealt with it yourself. And having a sibiling does not count because you were a child yourself and never dealt with it; your parents did.


Do not assume that i am a lazy parent, do not assume that my child has a shitty life, or that i don't discipline my child.  do not assume that I am not involved in my child life. I am more involved then most parent who have a child that does not have a disorder because i have to be. I am a sahm because of my child disorder. because of my child disorder I do not have the opporunity to be a lazy parent.


Everyone is entitled to their own opinion but that doesn't mean you have to share that opinion. You do not know me or anyone else who deal with this daily. So you can not assume anything.


Do not assume my kid is the bad kid. My child isn't a bad kid. He has a disorder but that does not make him a bad kid. these children get label enough as it is.

Does it make you feel better to belittle someone about something you don't know anything about? does it make you feel better to degrade their parenting all because their child has a disorder that neither parents or child can control. 

We all have our obstacles to cross and some are a little different than others. Parents who deal with children with these disorder are very strong parents because it isn't anyone who can deal with this, it take a very special person to deal with it.

Yes these children can learn control but it take years to learn the control and it doesn't happen overnight.

Yes my child will remain in school and i will not homeschool my child because some of you think my chlid shouldn't be in public school. He deserve a education as much as the next kid.

vent over

Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 19, 2013 at 7:55 PM
Replies (111-115):
kailu1835
by Ruby Member on Sep. 20, 2013 at 3:18 PM
Well according to every expert, you would be wrong.

Quoting Anonymous:

If you say so, but i do know differently.

Quoting kailu1835:

Parenting style does have to change depending on the kid. Period. Not just discipline. How I talk to my oldest is different than how I have to talk to my daughter. I can offhandedly tell my daughter its time to go, and she will go put shoes on and get in the car. I have to go up to my son, touch him on the shoulder to get his attention and detail out...socks, shoes, get in the car and get buckled. Otherwise, he won't put on his shoes, and may just stand around waiting for me to let him know its time to get in the car. That's kind of a poor example, but my point is that not every kid thinks the same way, so you have to meet them at the level they need. It isn't just a discipline thing.



Quoting Anonymous:

the parenting style doesn't change it is the type of discipline that is use that is different. I do not parent differently.

Quoting kailu1835:

Only responding to one part here, I'm not doubting that you have a kid with odd.





Three different kids parented the same may turn out three different ways because they're three different kids. My kids don't have any special needs that I know of, and three very different personalities. I cannot parent the same way. Doing so would only cause problems. Parenting is not a one size fits all type of thing. So in some cases, a kid gone bad IS the parents fault, even though the other children might be just fine and the parent isn't a bad parenting, just not parenting to the specific needs of that one child.






Quoting Anonymous:

explain to me if it is the parents fault then why is it that there can be a home with 2 or 3 kids and only one child has the disorder? when every child is discipline the same. From what I have been told by every single mental health doctor and a Neurologist , it is the same as ADHD, Depression ect.. an imbalance in the brain chemistry aka they don't know what causes it .

Quoting sara82lee:

I taught a kid with ODD a few years ago and I have to say it was an awful experience and took away from the education of the other kids in the class. Myself and a few of his other teachers went to a seminar on just this disorder, and the Doctor there told us thag the disorder has absolutely no biological origin. Unlike kids with adhd or other disorders where you can find differences in brain activity or other indicators, there is no biological difference between a kid with ODD and one without. He basically said it was the parents' fault in 99% of the cases he saw, and in perhaps 1% there was some other reason, such as some kind of traumatizing event like the death of a parent or similar.







This child is the only one I've ever taught with ODD, so I don't have a big range of experience. But I do firmly believe that he was well able to exercise self control and make good choices if he wanted to. He did so for almost a whole quarter, and didn't seem at all different than the rest of the kids. Then one day be decided it just wasn't fun anymore I guess. The change was overnight. And the school was powerless to discipline him. Putting gum and pixie sticks in another child's braids (it was so bad she had to get them taken out), and all the other stuff he did, was a "manifestation of his disability" and therefore he was untouchable. We are not helping.




Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 20, 2013 at 3:19 PM

well according to every one of my children doctor you are wrong and i do think they are experts.

Quoting kailu1835:

Well according to every expert, you would be wrong.

Quoting Anonymous:

If you say so, but i do know differently.

Quoting kailu1835:

Parenting style does have to change depending on the kid. Period. Not just discipline. How I talk to my oldest is different than how I have to talk to my daughter. I can offhandedly tell my daughter its time to go, and she will go put shoes on and get in the car. I have to go up to my son, touch him on the shoulder to get his attention and detail out...socks, shoes, get in the car and get buckled. Otherwise, he won't put on his shoes, and may just stand around waiting for me to let him know its time to get in the car. That's kind of a poor example, but my point is that not every kid thinks the same way, so you have to meet them at the level they need. It isn't just a discipline thing.



Quoting Anonymous:

the parenting style doesn't change it is the type of discipline that is use that is different. I do not parent differently.

Quoting kailu1835:

Only responding to one part here, I'm not doubting that you have a kid with odd.





Three different kids parented the same may turn out three different ways because they're three different kids. My kids don't have any special needs that I know of, and three very different personalities. I cannot parent the same way. Doing so would only cause problems. Parenting is not a one size fits all type of thing. So in some cases, a kid gone bad IS the parents fault, even though the other children might be just fine and the parent isn't a bad parenting, just not parenting to the specific needs of that one child.






Quoting Anonymous:

explain to me if it is the parents fault then why is it that there can be a home with 2 or 3 kids and only one child has the disorder? when every child is discipline the same. From what I have been told by every single mental health doctor and a Neurologist , it is the same as ADHD, Depression ect.. an imbalance in the brain chemistry aka they don't know what causes it .

Quoting sara82lee:

I taught a kid with ODD a few years ago and I have to say it was an awful experience and took away from the education of the other kids in the class. Myself and a few of his other teachers went to a seminar on just this disorder, and the Doctor there told us thag the disorder has absolutely no biological origin. Unlike kids with adhd or other disorders where you can find differences in brain activity or other indicators, there is no biological difference between a kid with ODD and one without. He basically said it was the parents' fault in 99% of the cases he saw, and in perhaps 1% there was some other reason, such as some kind of traumatizing event like the death of a parent or similar.







This child is the only one I've ever taught with ODD, so I don't have a big range of experience. But I do firmly believe that he was well able to exercise self control and make good choices if he wanted to. He did so for almost a whole quarter, and didn't seem at all different than the rest of the kids. Then one day be decided it just wasn't fun anymore I guess. The change was overnight. And the school was powerless to discipline him. Putting gum and pixie sticks in another child's braids (it was so bad she had to get them taken out), and all the other stuff he did, was a "manifestation of his disability" and therefore he was untouchable. We are not helping.





kailu1835
by Ruby Member on Sep. 20, 2013 at 3:21 PM
If your kids doctors are telling you that all of your kids should be parented exactly the same except for discipline, then they are all quacks.

Quoting Anonymous:

well according to every one of my children doctor you are wrong and i do think they are experts.

Quoting kailu1835:

Well according to every expert, you would be wrong.



Quoting Anonymous:

If you say so, but i do know differently.

Quoting kailu1835:

Parenting style does have to change depending on the kid. Period. Not just discipline. How I talk to my oldest is different than how I have to talk to my daughter. I can offhandedly tell my daughter its time to go, and she will go put shoes on and get in the car. I have to go up to my son, touch him on the shoulder to get his attention and detail out...socks, shoes, get in the car and get buckled. Otherwise, he won't put on his shoes, and may just stand around waiting for me to let him know its time to get in the car. That's kind of a poor example, but my point is that not every kid thinks the same way, so you have to meet them at the level they need. It isn't just a discipline thing.





Quoting Anonymous:

the parenting style doesn't change it is the type of discipline that is use that is different. I do not parent differently.

Quoting kailu1835:

Only responding to one part here, I'm not doubting that you have a kid with odd.







Three different kids parented the same may turn out three different ways because they're three different kids. My kids don't have any special needs that I know of, and three very different personalities. I cannot parent the same way. Doing so would only cause problems. Parenting is not a one size fits all type of thing. So in some cases, a kid gone bad IS the parents fault, even though the other children might be just fine and the parent isn't a bad parenting, just not parenting to the specific needs of that one child.








Quoting Anonymous:

explain to me if it is the parents fault then why is it that there can be a home with 2 or 3 kids and only one child has the disorder? when every child is discipline the same. From what I have been told by every single mental health doctor and a Neurologist , it is the same as ADHD, Depression ect.. an imbalance in the brain chemistry aka they don't know what causes it .

Quoting sara82lee:

I taught a kid with ODD a few years ago and I have to say it was an awful experience and took away from the education of the other kids in the class. Myself and a few of his other teachers went to a seminar on just this disorder, and the Doctor there told us thag the disorder has absolutely no biological origin. Unlike kids with adhd or other disorders where you can find differences in brain activity or other indicators, there is no biological difference between a kid with ODD and one without. He basically said it was the parents' fault in 99% of the cases he saw, and in perhaps 1% there was some other reason, such as some kind of traumatizing event like the death of a parent or similar.









This child is the only one I've ever taught with ODD, so I don't have a big range of experience. But I do firmly believe that he was well able to exercise self control and make good choices if he wanted to. He did so for almost a whole quarter, and didn't seem at all different than the rest of the kids. Then one day be decided it just wasn't fun anymore I guess. The change was overnight. And the school was powerless to discipline him. Putting gum and pixie sticks in another child's braids (it was so bad she had to get them taken out), and all the other stuff he did, was a "manifestation of his disability" and therefore he was untouchable. We are not helping.





Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 20, 2013 at 3:24 PM

 I guess my children have had 7 different quacks then and that are just the mental health doctor not including the neurologist and pedi. and I do believe that i will believe professionals over some know it all on cafemom. and I do believe that i have done a good job being that my dd is fine and my ds is getting better.  and I HAVE  NEVER CHANGED MY PARENTING STYLE JUST DISCIPLINE.

Quoting kailu1835:

If your kids doctors are telling you that all of your kids should be parented exactly the same except for discipline, then they are all quacks.

Quoting Anonymous:

well according to every one of my children doctor you are wrong and i do think they are experts.

Quoting kailu1835:

Well according to every expert, you would be wrong.



Quoting Anonymous:

If you say so, but i do know differently.

Quoting kailu1835:

Parenting style does have to change depending on the kid. Period. Not just discipline. How I talk to my oldest is different than how I have to talk to my daughter. I can offhandedly tell my daughter its time to go, and she will go put shoes on and get in the car. I have to go up to my son, touch him on the shoulder to get his attention and detail out...socks, shoes, get in the car and get buckled. Otherwise, he won't put on his shoes, and may just stand around waiting for me to let him know its time to get in the car. That's kind of a poor example, but my point is that not every kid thinks the same way, so you have to meet them at the level they need. It isn't just a discipline thing.





Quoting Anonymous:

the parenting style doesn't change it is the type of discipline that is use that is different. I do not parent differently.

Quoting kailu1835:

Only responding to one part here, I'm not doubting that you have a kid with odd.







Three different kids parented the same may turn out three different ways because they're three different kids. My kids don't have any special needs that I know of, and three very different personalities. I cannot parent the same way. Doing so would only cause problems. Parenting is not a one size fits all type of thing. So in some cases, a kid gone bad IS the parents fault, even though the other children might be just fine and the parent isn't a bad parenting, just not parenting to the specific needs of that one child.








Quoting Anonymous:

explain to me if it is the parents fault then why is it that there can be a home with 2 or 3 kids and only one child has the disorder? when every child is discipline the same. From what I have been told by every single mental health doctor and a Neurologist , it is the same as ADHD, Depression ect.. an imbalance in the brain chemistry aka they don't know what causes it .

Quoting sara82lee:

I taught a kid with ODD a few years ago and I have to say it was an awful experience and took away from the education of the other kids in the class. Myself and a few of his other teachers went to a seminar on just this disorder, and the Doctor there told us thag the disorder has absolutely no biological origin. Unlike kids with adhd or other disorders where you can find differences in brain activity or other indicators, there is no biological difference between a kid with ODD and one without. He basically said it was the parents' fault in 99% of the cases he saw, and in perhaps 1% there was some other reason, such as some kind of traumatizing event like the death of a parent or similar.









This child is the only one I've ever taught with ODD, so I don't have a big range of experience. But I do firmly believe that he was well able to exercise self control and make good choices if he wanted to. He did so for almost a whole quarter, and didn't seem at all different than the rest of the kids. Then one day be decided it just wasn't fun anymore I guess. The change was overnight. And the school was powerless to discipline him. Putting gum and pixie sticks in another child's braids (it was so bad she had to get them taken out), and all the other stuff he did, was a "manifestation of his disability" and therefore he was untouchable. We are not helping.






kailu1835
by Ruby Member on Sep. 20, 2013 at 3:40 PM
Okay then.

Quoting Anonymous:

 I guess my children have had 7 different quacks then and that are just the mental health doctor not including the neurologist and pedi. and I do believe that i will believe professionals over some know it all on cafemom. and I do believe that i have done a good job being that my dd is fine and my ds is getting better.  and I HAVE  NEVER CHANGED MY PARENTING STYLE JUST DISCIPLINE.

Quoting kailu1835:

If your kids doctors are telling you that all of your kids should be parented exactly the same except for discipline, then they are all quacks.



Quoting Anonymous:

well according to every one of my children doctor you are wrong and i do think they are experts.

Quoting kailu1835:

Well according to every expert, you would be wrong.





Quoting Anonymous:

If you say so, but i do know differently.

Quoting kailu1835:

Parenting style does have to change depending on the kid. Period. Not just discipline. How I talk to my oldest is different than how I have to talk to my daughter. I can offhandedly tell my daughter its time to go, and she will go put shoes on and get in the car. I have to go up to my son, touch him on the shoulder to get his attention and detail out...socks, shoes, get in the car and get buckled. Otherwise, he won't put on his shoes, and may just stand around waiting for me to let him know its time to get in the car. That's kind of a poor example, but my point is that not every kid thinks the same way, so you have to meet them at the level they need. It isn't just a discipline thing.







Quoting Anonymous:

the parenting style doesn't change it is the type of discipline that is use that is different. I do not parent differently.

Quoting kailu1835:

Only responding to one part here, I'm not doubting that you have a kid with odd.









Three different kids parented the same may turn out three different ways because they're three different kids. My kids don't have any special needs that I know of, and three very different personalities. I cannot parent the same way. Doing so would only cause problems. Parenting is not a one size fits all type of thing. So in some cases, a kid gone bad IS the parents fault, even though the other children might be just fine and the parent isn't a bad parenting, just not parenting to the specific needs of that one child.










Quoting Anonymous:

explain to me if it is the parents fault then why is it that there can be a home with 2 or 3 kids and only one child has the disorder? when every child is discipline the same. From what I have been told by every single mental health doctor and a Neurologist , it is the same as ADHD, Depression ect.. an imbalance in the brain chemistry aka they don't know what causes it .

Quoting sara82lee:

I taught a kid with ODD a few years ago and I have to say it was an awful experience and took away from the education of the other kids in the class. Myself and a few of his other teachers went to a seminar on just this disorder, and the Doctor there told us thag the disorder has absolutely no biological origin. Unlike kids with adhd or other disorders where you can find differences in brain activity or other indicators, there is no biological difference between a kid with ODD and one without. He basically said it was the parents' fault in 99% of the cases he saw, and in perhaps 1% there was some other reason, such as some kind of traumatizing event like the death of a parent or similar.











This child is the only one I've ever taught with ODD, so I don't have a big range of experience. But I do firmly believe that he was well able to exercise self control and make good choices if he wanted to. He did so for almost a whole quarter, and didn't seem at all different than the rest of the kids. Then one day be decided it just wasn't fun anymore I guess. The change was overnight. And the school was powerless to discipline him. Putting gum and pixie sticks in another child's braids (it was so bad she had to get them taken out), and all the other stuff he did, was a "manifestation of his disability" and therefore he was untouchable. We are not helping.






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