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i just dont know what to think....

Posted by on Sep. 22, 2013 at 5:27 AM
  • 5 Replies

 so a lil bit of history on the matter. my sons father and i broke up 2 months ago. there were a lot of little things that built up for me which resulted to me leaving our home and going back to moms i.e. i was stressed out, i was sleep deprived due to working 3rd shift, and i think the one that hit me most was my sons father getting custody of his 2 older kids (7 & 8) it was just getting used to this huge adjustment and i was unable to find balance with it all and i think what was most difficult was that he works 16hrs plus a day. i just felt like the whole mother load was all on me and i couldnt find balance.... lol long story short it came to a day where i exploded. i felt like iwas being taken for granted. like i was expected to be iRobot and function on 2hrs worth of sleep and still work all night. i just felt like i kept asking for help since our big adjustment to having the sk but i wasnt being heard. just fyi im in no way complaining of the sk i just needed help to adjust and come to a point where i could find balance with it all.

anyways since kind of giving a light scoop of the situation, yesterday i went to see a medium. mainly because i feel like a lost soul right now. i feel like i have so much going on my plate and i dont know what to take on first. i know right now my son should be my priority and he is. but to be honest the thing that is constantly on my mind is my sons father. i miss him.

any whoo back on the medium, it came to the point during the reading that he pointed out that i feel conflicted on the decision i had made, but that i should learn to trust my gut instinct. he reassured me that taking action on making myself heard was a good thing that putting myself first for once is ok. and i agree. things honestly came to a point where i felt like i was drowning and i kept asking for help and my sons dad would just stand there and say "ok" but would do nothing but watch me struggle.

what im so heart broken about is that the medium told me that my sons father isnt the one for me. that there is someone else but "he" will come when my soul is ready...

sigh.... i really dont know why im writting this. maybe cus i feel really conflicted right now. some words of wisdom, encouragement would be nice..... blah besides the fact that im at work and i literately have 8 hours to mind F*#K myself.... im just so tired of tired of feeling so lost.

by on Sep. 22, 2013 at 5:27 AM
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Replies (1-5):
by Anonymous 1 on Sep. 22, 2013 at 5:34 AM
I know the feeling. i still have feelings for my children's father. but i have seen a new life for me and my children. and i like that life so much that i am starting to no longer want to be with my children's father.
by Gold Member on Sep. 22, 2013 at 5:35 AM
Get some sleep. Your baby daddy reaction is proof he was not the one for you. Keep on swimming.
by Anonymous 2 on Sep. 22, 2013 at 5:44 AM

Mediums are fake. I do not believe in them. Over all is your husband a good man. Is he good to you? Is he good to the children? Has he abused you? Does he pay the bills or does he waste the money? Step back and look at the big picture.  Yes you need more help from him.  Could your family get buy on just his pay check or with you going part time? Write him a letter and tell him what is wrong. Could family help the two of you with child care so you can sleep? Can you go to another shift? But mostly i would write him. 

by Gold Member on Sep. 22, 2013 at 5:58 AM

im kind of in the same boat. it feels like the answer is right in front of me but its too foggy all around me to make any sense of it.

my advice is to take some time. perhaps you are were you are because you need to a little lost in order to find your way and you might find that indeed, you need to be ok with going in your own direction. perhaps the path that joins you with him isnt intended for you so you are blocked from getting further.  if your focus on your son seems more clearer, it could be that follwing that will lead you into a better situation. it seems you are at a crossroads.

by peachy on Sep. 22, 2013 at 5:59 AM
Let it go. Don't worry about the medium

Just let it go. Why I say this is because toxic relationships are dangerous. Give it some time and if it is meant to be it will be.

If.not it won't. Accept that. But let it go.

I know that when my dd's sperm donor left me and her I was heart broken. I cried for days I just sulked. Did I spell that right

Then I woke up one day and I was ok. It didn't hurt anymore. I can't explain it. It was sort of like , I just knew I would be ok. The pain was no longer as sharp. I knew I was sad but I k ew I was going to be ok.

And you will be too. You are just used to being comfy. But give it time and be ok for a moment. Then see if like a boomerang he comes back. If it is meant to be, he will.

Don't waste your time because it hurts
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