for the last time, last night was it for me.
want a peaceful life. and now more than ever so, thats what ill be
doing.. i dont want to fight with you and i dont want a one sided
friendship so until then, from this point forward, you want your
belongings, come get them. but no favors, no rides, no extended visits.
no drunk phone calls and no using me for anything. im putting it all on
hold till you get your damn head out of your ass. there i said it
because it needs to be said. im tired and worn out for trying to
maintain relationship so one sided, all i ever get in return is hurt
and frustration and its getting in my way and attention with the girls.
There's no point. i dont want a friend who dosnt even like me anyway. i
have no time for this. if the way you treat me is any indication of what
im worth to you then dont bother, i get it, you made it quite clear. i
You can call and talk to the girls, you want to see them, we can set something up, no problem. They are my reason for everything. you have no idea how much they have already been through and how much they really need me. its hard enough on the kids to only have one parent, but they have to share me with my job and other responsibilities too. im already stretched more than id like so id appreciate if you would stop giving me hell and making things difficult. you are daddy and very important to them so i will continue to make that effort on their behalf, but only halfway, the rest is up to you. they are, on this earth, the two people who should never ever have to wait on you. if theres anyone that should see the best of you. its them. end of story.
ive been up all night really thinking about this. things have reached this point. ive tried for so long and what happened tonight wasnt major but a turning point. an epiphany! ive written this letter many many times and im really trying not be be vindictive but i have to be clear about how i feel. ive poured my heart out so many times that i dont even bother about it anymore, he seems not to care, so i hoped i made my point? for the most part, we are "friends" but like i said in the letter, it just gets complicated with him and stupid. he is an alcoholic, once in recovery but completely off the wagon. also some mental issues that he really needs to take care of. i love him with all my heart and its so painful but i have to make the cut. i lost the marriage and now the friendship is suffering too. its more than i can take especially since i just want to take care of my girls. does this make sense?
and yes im doing it in email. we communicate better this way.
id appreciate anyones insight and i thank you.
and dont bother getting on me with the way i type. its just how i write.