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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Venting from a SM

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 52 Replies
I know I'll probably just get a lot of replies saying "You shouldn't have married a man with kids" but oh well.

Dh pays his ex $780 a month for CS. They have 3 DDs together that are 17, 15, and 11. SD17 is a senior so a lot of costs are coming up. We paid for her back to school clothes and we bought her some more stuff this weekend. We're paying for her homecoming/prom stuff (we already agreed to this). For SD15 we agreed to pay for her homecoming stuff also. Not to mention we help pay for any expenses their school sports/activities cost. We take them on trips once every few months (we just went to Six Flags a couple weekends ago).

I think it's fair to say we spend our fair amount, but BM doesn't think so. She asked us to pay for ALL of SD17's senior stuff (cap and gown, pictures, yearbook, etc.) The only "extras" BM really has to pay for after bills is cellphones and since we scrape to get by after paying all our expenses, we told her no. She threw a fit and said we should be helping out as much as we can.

Just to clarify before I'm told to butt out of it, Dh was texting her about this and she mentioned me. She told him if he couldn't afford his first family, he shouldn't have had a second family. He went OFF. We have a 7 mo DS who wasn't even planned, we had plans to have 2-3 kids of our own after SD15 graduated because we know we wouldn't afford it and be able to give the SDs what they need, so we do think of them. We try to do what we can for them. The least BM can do is hold up her end and not try and pull our SDs against us. She's also mad at us for not pulling together a college fund for our SDs but we have one for our DS. We do that because Dh doesn't agree to making a college fund but I do, so I put back every month from the money *I* make.

I don't think BM should even be able to talk about us not contributing. We pay for all this yet the only thing she'll pay for is giving them spending money if they want to go do something. We also went in half on getting SD17's car and we'll do the same for the other 2. We're trying to do what we need to do and more, but she's making our lives hell doing it!
Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 22, 2013 at 9:53 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Flalies
by on Sep. 22, 2013 at 9:55 PM
Sucks to be you...lol
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 22, 2013 at 9:55 PM
I probably should've mentioned this was long
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 22, 2013 at 9:57 PM
1 mom liked this
Yep. Funny a few years ago when someone told me about the BM/SM drama, I figured it was all exaggerations.


Quoting Flalies:

Sucks to be you...lol

diaperstodating
by on Sep. 22, 2013 at 10:00 PM

hugs

buttercup627
by Platinum Member on Sep. 22, 2013 at 10:00 PM
1 mom liked this
Well you're almost done at least.Maybe it's time they go back and get everything written as to who pays for what and what the cs is supposed to cover. Aside from that you just have to keep smiling
KSBlueyz
by Bronze Member on Sep. 22, 2013 at 10:00 PM

Sounds like she's jealous of the relationship you have. 


Dont nut contribute any more than what you've already agreed to. You're just feeding into the monster. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Sep. 22, 2013 at 10:01 PM
LOL. Ex has to pay 1,200 for just two kids. I'd be happy with that amount for three.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Sep. 22, 2013 at 10:01 PM

bump

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Sep. 22, 2013 at 10:03 PM
Holy shit. Where do all of you live that you're paying 1000+? I'm in North TX and the norm here is 300-400.


Quoting Anonymous:

LOL. Ex has to pay 1,200 for just two kids. I'd be happy with that amount for three.

Sassy762
by CAFE SASSY HBIC on Sep. 22, 2013 at 10:03 PM
1 mom liked this

So what does BM pay for out of the CS money...rent, utilities and food??

I think you guys are  generous with your SD's.....that is a good thing.  I think you are being fair, you paid for school clothes, senior prom/homecoming. ...and car. BM could at least pay for Senior dues,cap/gown, pictures. 

So what happens IF she refuses to pay for the senior stuff....then what happens?? Does SD 17 have a job after school/weekends???

                              


                                           


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