I have no desire to live, a broken heart is too painful.
I was in a long term relationship and was tossed aside for someone else. I adored my (ex) husband, he was not only my best friend and I trusted and loved him unconditionally. He has been gone for about four months and each day it is a struggle to not think of him and only ways to put an end to my life. I have several options but I am too chicken to go through with any of them. We had no children. I am falling apart and have no desire to do anything, cleaning myself or my home, I don't eat and I only look forward to the time when I can escape is sleep and that doesn't always help. I dream of him and the things we used to do together. I get those pat answers, time will heal you, you will find someone else, the list is endless. He has already remarried so him coming back is not an option. I just cannot imagine the rest of my life like this, alone, hurting, scared of my own shadow. I have no way to get any mental health and the free options are not an option where I live. I don't want to live in this much pain, as soon as I can find the courage to go through with it and have some proper method of going through with it.