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Fight about Christmas. poll added

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 286 Replies

 

Poll

Question: So?

Options:

Stay home then leave day after christmas

go to TX

invite ILs to come here

Stay home and keep our AGREED upon plan


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 212

View Results

Okay so this will be our first Christmas as parents. When our son was born in February I told DH that I wanted our first Christmas to be just us. He said ok I want that too.

Today his parents said they'll pay for us to come to TX if we spend Christmas with them. He is mad because I said I don't want to go for Christmas. I told him we could go before or after or maybe even thanksgiving, but this is our first Christmas as parents and it's special and I don't want to share it with anyone. (Not even my parents who live 25 minutes away much less stay halfway across the country). He flew off the handle and said I was selfish. In the two years we've been together he has never wanted to go to TX to be with his family, and he way his mom is I know it's because she wants to be a part of our son's first Christmas. I don't have a problem with that sentiment but I really just want it to be our immediate family. I even offered that we could fly down the day after Christmas and spend NYE down there, but that wasn't good enough. He started talking about how just because I don't have a big family doesn't mean we have to be hermits for Christmas. I was offended by that. I didn't say I didn't want to go at all. I just said Christmas DAY I wanted just for our family.

I don't think I am being unfair, but DH really thinks I am. So. What do you guys think? Do you think day after Christmas is ok? That way we still celebrate the holiday with his parents, siblings, and aunt/uncle, but the day of is just for our family.

Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 29, 2013 at 11:36 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Sep. 29, 2013 at 11:39 PM
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Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Sep. 29, 2013 at 11:39 PM
Bump
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Sep. 29, 2013 at 11:39 PM
3 moms liked this
No idea. Family should ALL be together on Christmas. That being said, since my son wad born I have anywhere between 20-35 people at my house for Christmas
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Sep. 29, 2013 at 11:39 PM
Bump
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Sep. 29, 2013 at 11:41 PM
1 mom liked this
After I had my dd and went though thanksgiving with visiting all the families because everyone just had to see the new baby. It was horrible, I told my husband that for now on if anyone wanted to see us for any holidays they had to come to us because I was not leaving my house again. Lucky he agreed that he didn't want our kids to have to leave their new toys just to go to grandmas on Christmas.
Stock to your guns and stay home.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Sep. 29, 2013 at 11:41 PM
Well if we go to TX then MY family (parents, uncle, cousins, 97 year old grandma) miss out. We aren't doing stuff with them day of Christmas, but if we go to TX day after Christmas then we would celebrate with my parents a couple days before or Christmas Eve then with his family day after.


Quoting Anonymous:

No idea. Family should ALL be together on Christmas. That being said, since my son wad born I have anywhere between 20-35 people at my house for Christmas

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Sep. 29, 2013 at 11:44 PM
I'm not so much worried about the toys because our son is only 8 months old, but I am more thinking about our first Christmas as parents. This is something we will only get to have once. Even when we have another baby, we will never have our first Christmas as parents and I feel like if he guilts me into going.m I will resent him for that for a very long time.


Quoting Anonymous:

After I had my dd and went though thanksgiving with visiting all the families because everyone just had to see the new baby. It was horrible, I told my husband that for now on if anyone wanted to see us for any holidays they had to come to us because I was not leaving my house again. Lucky he agreed that he didn't want our kids to have to leave their new toys just to go to grandmas on Christmas.

Stock to your guns and stay home.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Sep. 29, 2013 at 11:44 PM
2 moms liked this
Our rule is home with the youngest kid is where everyone meets. My family plus my inlaws my aunts his aunts etc. All come to us. Since I have the only child

Quoting Anonymous:

Well if we go to TX then MY family (parents, uncle, cousins, 97 year old grandma) miss out. We aren't doing stuff with them day of Christmas, but if we go to TX day after Christmas then we would celebrate with my parents a couple days before or Christmas Eve then with his family day after.




Quoting Anonymous:

No idea. Family should ALL be together on Christmas. That being said, since my son wad born I have anywhere between 20-35 people at my house for Christmas

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Sep. 29, 2013 at 11:45 PM
Next year I think that's what we will do.

This year I really just want to be a nuclear family for Christmas Day and snuggle and watch movies and play.


Quoting Anonymous:

Our rule is home with the youngest kid is where everyone meets. My family plus my inlaws my aunts his aunts etc. All come to us. Since I have the only child



Quoting Anonymous:

Well if we go to TX then MY family (parents, uncle, cousins, 97 year old grandma) miss out. We aren't doing stuff with them day of Christmas, but if we go to TX day after Christmas then we would celebrate with my parents a couple days before or Christmas Eve then with his family day after.






Quoting Anonymous:

No idea. Family should ALL be together on Christmas. That being said, since my son wad born I have anywhere between 20-35 people at my house for Christmas


sweetieiv
by Ruby Member on Sep. 29, 2013 at 11:46 PM
I think that fighting over Christmas is stupid. Also you know people change their mind all the time so don't be so harsh. You want it to just be you guys and that would be special for YOU but what about him? He wants to spend it with his family too and so what if he hasn't wanted to go visit ever since you are together. Have you never in your life changed your mind?
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