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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

a kid was calling dd names on the playground...did I handle it wrongly?

Posted by on Sep. 30, 2013 at 10:04 AM
  • 80 Replies

dh is in a softball league in our area. so I go watch him every week and dd plays on the playground with all of her friends. there is this one little girl (about 10) who is always picking on dd7. she calls her names like brownie, poop face, dirt girl, and stupid mexican, (I am white btw and dh is hispanic so she does have a more brown skin tone). she is always speaking to her in gibberish (mimicking spanish) but dd speaks english only. I honestly can't help but to conclude that this is learned behaviour and it makes me sad.

Anyway, this happens every week at the softball games. the same girl is there, making fun of dd. she comes home crying every week. I always try to concil dd and ask her "are you stupid? a poop face? etc.." Of course she isn't. So I tell her, "if what she's is saying isn't true, don't worry about it."

Well this week, as with every other week, we went to the softball game to watch dh play. I decided to sit closer to the playground so I could possibly see/hear what was going on with the bullying. As expected the little girl once again started in on dd. I noticed that the other little girl's mom was standing nearby and could see and hear the entire thing. she said nothing to her daughter. So I walked over to her and explained to her that her daughter had been bullying mine since the beginning of the season. her response was that kids need to learn early that the world isn't all rainbows and unicorns and that perhaps I shouldn't shelter my kids so much. In a sense, I actually had been trying to allow dd to deal on her own. But things had just continued to get worse.

About the time she'd said this I noticed her daughter hitting mine...kind of picking at her and taunting her. So I walk over to the girls and explain to the bully that how she is treating dd is not nice. I ask her if she would be happy if someone were to treat her the same way. then I tell her that the next time she puts her hands on dd that dd has permission to knock her out. I then explained to her that the most important thing she could remember in life is that you should always treat people how you want them to treat you.

I'm not really sure if what I said will make a difference or not. Judging by her mom's response, she is fed hatred daily. But I have to hope that it will. In the meantime, dd will not be at the playgound again if I am not sitting close enough to see/hear what is going on. I honestly had no clue that things were as bad as they were.

by on Sep. 30, 2013 at 10:04 AM
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Replies (1-10):
shabbalaquita
by Gold Member on Sep. 30, 2013 at 10:07 AM

BUMP!

Superlaura328
by Platinum Member on Sep. 30, 2013 at 10:07 AM
2 moms liked this

I would have kicked her in the face, and then went and kicked her mom in the face. Kidding, kidding (or am I?). lol. 

Seriously, I think you handled it very well. The girl clearly does not have a good role model to teach her how people should be treated, and it was warranted for you to try and get through to her. Hopefully she learns NOT to learn from her mother!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Sep. 30, 2013 at 10:08 AM
How did the bully react when you said that? Unfortunately it's not her fault. It's the way she was raised. I would keep my dd off the playground.
shabbalaquita
by Gold Member on Sep. 30, 2013 at 10:08 AM
1 mom liked this


trust me, I wanted to kick them both. but I know that would not have solved anything.

Quoting Superlaura328:

I would have kicked her in the face, and then went and kicked her mom in the face. Kidding, kidding (or am I?). lol. 

Seriously, I think you handled it very well. The girl clearly does not have a good role model to teach her how people should be treated, and it was warranted for you to try and get through to her. Hopefully she learns NOT to learn from her mother!



Toonkasmommy
by Platinum Member on Sep. 30, 2013 at 10:09 AM
3 moms liked this
I would have told my daughter to punch her square in the nose.
shabbalaquita
by Gold Member on Sep. 30, 2013 at 10:10 AM

she just stood there looking back and forth at me and her mom.

I'm really glad mom kept her distance. She honestly just seems like a hateful lazy hag


Quoting Anonymous:

How did the bully react when you said that? Unfortunately it's not her fault. It's the way she was raised. I would keep my dd off the playground.



Devious333
by Ruby Member on Sep. 30, 2013 at 10:10 AM
4 moms liked this
I'd tell her to keep her little shit face kid away from mine. A 10 year old with decent parents shouldn't be behaving that way. Her mom sounds like trash.
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Devious333
by Ruby Member on Sep. 30, 2013 at 10:11 AM
1 mom liked this
Same here.

Quoting Toonkasmommy:

I would have told my daughter to punch her square in the nose.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
shabbalaquita
by Gold Member on Sep. 30, 2013 at 10:12 AM

when we left I did apologized to dd for not saying something sooner. I honestly thought it was just a normal amount of "schoolyard teasing" and tried to get dd to just brush it off, until I saw first hand what was happening. I told dd if it happens again to beat the snot out of her.


Quoting Toonkasmommy:

I would have told my daughter to punch her square in the nose.



Missy.Anon
by on Sep. 30, 2013 at 10:12 AM
1 mom liked this

Other than saying that your kid could knock her out (I totally get what you are trying to do with that though), I think you handled it fine. If the mother isn't going to do something, you need to. I know it's hard for you to hear what your daughter is going through, but I think it's good that you tried to let her manage it on her own before stepping in.

And the mom is a twat.....

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