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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I see my lawyer tomorrow but still on the fence

Posted by on Oct. 3, 2013 at 12:44 AM
  • 98 Replies
1 mom liked this
Okay so my question is should I continue the no contact between my two ds with my exh or do supervised visits?
A little back story: My exh and I meet 7 yrs ago and had two Ds and a dd together. He never really seemed to into his family and always seemed to have more important things to do then spend time with us. Never did one on one time with any of his children when we where together. So two years ago my now exh kicked me and our three children out of the house a month after my dd was born. He tried to keep me on the back burner but I got sick of the games and filed for a divorce. When we first split he never really saw the kids or even asked about them. Until I got into another relationship then we finally came to a agreement Feb of last yr that he would take them every other weekend and one month in the summer. Went great for a while. The Feb of this year dd 1yr old comes home with bruises all over her face. I call ss and there is a investigation. In the end the can't prove out of the 15 that live in his house who did it. So we do a chips order on my dd. And he also never asked to see the 3months that the investigation was going on. When we went to court afterward I ask if he could look me in the face and say his gf did not do that to my dd. He said no he couldn't he knew her temper and jealousy. Well I fought tooth and nail not to let them go back If she was going to be around still. Well he lied said they wherent together any longer so they finally aloud him to take them in the end of April. Well in June they went for the monthly visit and my dd at 22 months was murdered at the hands of the gf that was not suppose to be in the picture. Well since then he has not seen our two ds. They where witness to their sisters murder. He really never has asked to see them or gone out of his way, except once, to Ccsee his boys at all. Our DSs never ask or want to see him either. So tomorrow I go talk to a lawyer about visitation. She wants to temporarily cancel his visitations till his chips order in another county for his daughter with the murderer is over then he has to take me back to court to get supervised visits in order.
My boys are having Tons of mental and behavioral problems since it is all happened and I just don't know if see him would help or not.
I guess what I am asking is should I suspend all visits or do supervised visits now too?


Sorry can't do a clicks
http://thepulsenews.org/news/2013/9/10/mental-diseasedefect-plea-entered-in-osseo-homicide-case
by on Oct. 3, 2013 at 12:44 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Oct. 3, 2013 at 12:48 AM
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OMG, I'm so sorry!!!

I don't think I'd ever let my kids see him again, if I could prevent it. He didn't protect his daughter, who's to say he'll protect his sons.
seximami111
by Bronze Member on Oct. 3, 2013 at 12:50 AM
I'm so sorry for what your going through!
From what I read in your post he lied and she killed your DD? No.
I would not be able to let him around my children anymore, especially with the emotional and behavioral issues they are having. I can only imagine it would get worse being around him.
Again so sorry your having to go through this! Hugs!
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 3, 2013 at 12:50 AM
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umm if you have the option to suspend i would suspend. I am SO sorry about your daughter! And yeah don't traumatize your sons by making them see their father. Also courts usually increase visitation thru time. So i would start at the minimum, no contact. IN hopes that ex will never get unsupervised visits.

Babebaby
by Bronze Member on Oct. 3, 2013 at 12:52 AM
1 mom liked this
I would do everything in my power for him to never see them again! When they are 18 and want to see him that would be their choice. So suspend all visitation! I am so so very sorry for you lose. Are your boys seeing anyone and talking about what they seen or feel? I think it would do more harm then good for them to see their father. I wish you the best, if you need a ear pm me.
lauraborgelt87
by Member on Oct. 3, 2013 at 12:53 AM
1 mom liked this
Thank you.
I honestly don't want him ever to but don't want to be one of those bitch exs. Just want to so what's right for my children.


Quoting Anonymous:

OMG, I'm so sorry!!!



I don't think I'd ever let my kids see him again, if I could prevent it. He didn't protect his daughter, who's to say he'll protect his sons.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 3, 2013 at 12:54 AM


your child was murdered b/c ex husband was negligent enough to leave her with a murderer. No one can accuse you of being a bitch ex. I hope there are repurcussions on ex too. I'm sure he knew what his gf was capable of.

   How are you doing? I can't even imagine.

Quoting lauraborgelt87:

Thank you.
I honestly don't want him ever to but don't want to be one of those bitch exs. Just want to so what's right for my children.


Quoting Anonymous:

OMG, I'm so sorry!!!



I don't think I'd ever let my kids see him again, if I could prevent it. He didn't protect his daughter, who's to say he'll protect his sons.



lauraborgelt87
by Member on Oct. 3, 2013 at 12:55 AM
Yes that is what happened.
That is my thing I don't want to make it worse on my DSs.


Quoting seximami111:

I'm so sorry for what your going through!

From what I read in your post he lied and she killed your DD? No.

I would not be able to let him around my children anymore, especially with the emotional and behavioral issues they are having. I can only imagine it would get worse being around him.

Again so sorry your having to go through this! Hugs!

angie729
by Ruby Member on Oct. 3, 2013 at 12:55 AM

Sorry for your loss. Do your boys see a therapist? I would consult with the therapist on what they felt was best for the children. Personally I would suspended any visitation.

lauraborgelt87
by Member on Oct. 3, 2013 at 12:57 AM
yes my lawyer wants to suspend all rights until his chips with his other child is over. then if he wants to see them he has to take me back to court to get supervised visits only.


Quoting Anonymous:

umm if you have the option to suspend i would suspend. I am SO sorry about your daughter! And yeah don't traumatize your sons by making them see their father. Also courts usually increase visitation thru time. So i would start at the minimum, no contact. IN hopes that ex will never get unsupervised visits.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 3, 2013 at 12:58 AM


what's chips?

Quoting lauraborgelt87:

yes my lawyer wants to suspend all rights until his chips with his other child is over. then if he wants to see them he has to take me back to court to get supervised visits only.


Quoting Anonymous:

umm if you have the option to suspend i would suspend. I am SO sorry about your daughter! And yeah don't traumatize your sons by making them see their father. Also courts usually increase visitation thru time. So i would start at the minimum, no contact. IN hopes that ex will never get unsupervised visits.




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