Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Confession: I twerk in public restrooms.

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 25 Replies
1 mom liked this
I'm not even kidding. I made the mistake of youtubing "twerking" about a year ago. I didn't know movement like that was even possible. I was disgusted and hypnotized all at the same time. I was too intrigued not to attempt it myself. So I starting looking up tutorials and practicing and learned how to twerk. I've spent countless hours, knees bent, in a squatting position, hands on my knees, twerking away. It's sort of addicting. Even when I'm laying in bed at njght I will be flexing my glutes to a beat in my head. It's fun, it's a good work out and it turns on my dh so much but now it's causing a real problem.

2 words. PUBLIC. BATHROOMS.

I was always raised never to sit on the toilet in public restrooms, but to squat instead. That's where my problem comes in. It must be some sort of muscle memory because every single time I go in, pull my pants down, pop a squat and put my hands on my knees, you guessed it, I start TWERKING!!!!! I get n that position and my body automatically responds. My booty starts wobbling, my thighs get to flexing , I get some bounce in my knees and an arch in my back. I try to control it but it's really hard. And by the time I get control of myself I've already sprayed pee (or worse!) all over the toilet and floor, sometimes it even gets n my shoes and clothes! I can't just be still. At the very least I just have to do the left cheek pop, then right cheek pop then both cheek pops and repeat.

It's so embarrassing when other people are in the stalls next to me! I know they can see my legs going to work and shaking. They probably think I have a huge dingleberry I'm trying to shake loose.

I don't know what to do or how to stop it. It's completely involuntary. Just getting into that twerking/pooping/peeing position causes this muscle memory response in my body. I've started having to carry around Lysol wipes so I can clean up my splattered droplets. I'm so embarrassed!
Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 9, 2013 at 7:12 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
imakehimscream
by on Oct. 9, 2013 at 7:13 PM
Good for you
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 9, 2013 at 7:14 PM
1 mom liked this

I think you put a little too much effort into trying to be funny and creative on a troll post. You should have better spent your time being productive in some other manner. Meh. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Oct. 9, 2013 at 7:14 PM
Lmao!!
Mazi184
by Platinum Member on Oct. 9, 2013 at 7:15 PM
Bahahaha! That was a good one, thanks.
Ttetreault44
by on Oct. 9, 2013 at 7:18 PM
How about lining the toilet and sitting your butt down like everyone else. I'd rather sit on a public toilet seat than go in a stall after someone has pee'd all over it. And doesn't it concern you that after peeing on yourself you may smell like urine in public, not to mention the bacteria you are carrying around.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Oct. 9, 2013 at 7:21 PM
Use the Lysol wipes to wipe it so u can sit!
BEXi
by BEXi on Oct. 9, 2013 at 7:23 PM

laughing

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Oct. 9, 2013 at 7:25 PM
1 mom liked this

momofne
by on Oct. 9, 2013 at 7:27 PM

badFail


kyona_malone
by Bronze Member on Oct. 9, 2013 at 7:29 PM
Hahaha let me find out the leak from the next stall over is caused by an impulsive twerker hahaha comedy! Good one
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)