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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I need some major advice MIA dh contacted me Updated added info

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 43 Replies
My husband took off an went MIA when I was pregnancy with his 3rd baby. His son is almost 3 months old now and his other kids are 5&6 he's been gone for a total of 4 months with absolutely no contact no money was left to raise his kids and I birthed our son without him being present. All while I know he was with another women.

He contacted me Tuesday night for the first time and in that short 10 minute conversation was him telling me all that he's been through, living in Mexico for work. Now he's living in Oregon and he's planing on coming back down to so cal around the 16th. He wants to see the children.

I have mixed emotions about all this. I don't want to deny my kids their father but I don't think he deserves my kids. He abandoned all of us. Left me to fend for myself and for our family. Since he's been gone it was hard but were doing ok, we are healing and I'm scared to open back up to him. I've been strong and I thought I've let go and moved on but I'm terrified if I see him face to face that I will become weak. He is and was my first love. But he did me so dirty.

He's been calling me everyday this week. They are short phone calls from a private number, but it's something.

I don't know what to do. I feel so confused by all this. I don't even know where he stands with him and I. He doesn't really talk about it all and I'm scared if I bring it up to where he's gets nasty and angry I may not hear from him again. I'm trying to play my cards right in all this.

I could really use the advice on what I should do.

I know I'm gonna get bashed to hell for this but I'm the one who recently had the tummy tuck. And it's just crazy of all times he chooses to call me and try and see his kids when I'm in recovery. I feel like I should tell him to just not contact me again at all, because I don't need the extra stress in my life on top of him opening up old wounds and emotions. Especially when I forgave him...because I refuse him to continue to have power over me in that way.
Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 10, 2013 at 4:30 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Bigmetalchicken
by Ruby Member on Oct. 10, 2013 at 4:32 PM
7 moms liked this

Nope. He forfieted his chance to be a father and a man when he left the kids in a lurch like that for some vagina. Fuck him.

km1970
by Platinum Member on Oct. 10, 2013 at 4:33 PM
4 moms liked this

ummm..I would be going down and filing for divorce and custody. I would not allow him to see the kids without you present. You don't want him to take the kids and disappear with them.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Oct. 10, 2013 at 4:33 PM
1 mom liked this

You need to file for child support. You also need to file for divorce. He is not worth it, and you deserve better. I would find somebody to go with me, and tell him the children and I would meet him at the park for an hour. That way, he gets to see the kids, but he isn't alone with them.

Do not try to get back with this man. He did you wrong, isn't apologizing for it, and will do it again.

mama0207
by Member on Oct. 10, 2013 at 4:34 PM
2 moms liked this
The best advice I can give is to consult an attorney and a counselor, in that order. He sounds grossly unstable and should not be in your (and your kids') life.
Miller0305
by Platinum Member on Oct. 10, 2013 at 4:35 PM
2 moms liked this
I wouldn't trust him. What if he tries to take off with the kids?
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cLanief
by Ruby Member on Oct. 10, 2013 at 4:35 PM
1 mom liked this
Tell him to go fuck himself.
Mama07Shorty
by Bronze Member on Oct. 10, 2013 at 4:36 PM
1 mom liked this

fuck that and fuck him for forfieted his chance when he skipped out on all of you. File for divorce,child support and custody. if he didit once he will do it again. And you dont need him coming and taking off with your children.

Birdseed
by Bronze Member on Oct. 10, 2013 at 4:36 PM

I'm really sorry that you're going through this.  It must feel very overwhelming.

Is your DH mentally ill or something?  I'm trying to sort out why he'd just vanish.

Your personal relationship with him has to be separate from the kids IMHO. I'd want to speak to an attorney and sort out what is in your best interest legally.


MrsDavidB25
by Stacey on Oct. 10, 2013 at 4:36 PM

 I wouldn't allow it. Any man that does what he did cannot be mentally stable.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Oct. 10, 2013 at 4:37 PM
My mother believes I am wrong for not wanting him to see his kids. she says my kids will grow to resent me and I should allow him to see them whenever he ask even if he flakes or abandons them again.

Quoting Bigmetalchicken:

Nope. He forfieted his chance to be a father and a man when he left the kids in a lurch like that for some vagina. Fuck him.

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