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My Confession? I Slept with my brother for years and I don't see the big deal...

Ok, I really want to know how it is so cruel for opposite sex children to share a room, especially when they are babies. My cousin is pregnant and having a boy. She also has a daughter, who is two. She is currently living with her mother (temporarily due to an unexpected financial crisis) and she is going to have to put the baby in the room with her daughter. Her mother (my aunt) is making a big deal about how that is cruelty and she won't have it in her house. She says that they boy will be trying to invade his sister's privacy and will peek at her while she's changing. Wtf? He is at least 7 years away from even noticing that there is difference between girls and boys. She says it is perverted. I think she is stupid.

When I was a kid, we had a three bedroom house. My older brother was 5 years older. His bedroom was on the other side of the house. My room was across from my parents' room because I was younger and they wanted to be able to listen out for me. When I was 3, my younger brother was born. They couldn't put the baby on the other side of the house and expect the 8 year old to get up with him. They couldn't move the 8 year old and put the 3 year old on the other side of the house where they couldn't hear her incase of an emergency. They made the logical choice and put the baby in with me, when he was old enough. I loved having my little brother in the room with me and we grew up very close. When I was five and he was two, we moved to a bigger house with four bedrooms, all located conviently close to my parents' bedroom. Benny started getting out of his bed and sneaking into mine because he missed me. He slept in my bed for another six months. I don't see how that was abusive or cruel. I changed in the bathroom and he never invaded my privacy or peeked at me when I was getting dressed (not until we were much older but we were in seperate rooms by then and I kicked his ass once and that pretty much ended it). When my parents went through a rough patch in their marriage and were fighting a lot, both of us ended up in my older brother's bed a lot. Nothing inappropriate ever happened. We are now 21, 24 and 29 and we are still very close.

Seriously, what is the big deal?

CafeMom Tickers
by on Oct. 21, 2013 at 4:08 PM
Replies (441-450):
by Bronze Member on Oct. 22, 2013 at 11:34 PM
This I've heard if but I have a friend that has tricked the apartment staff saying it was just her and her husband and they would leave the daughter with them mom till they were moved in then bring in the daughter. My husband even said "they better not catch her"
Quoting elk571:

Up to a certain age I don't see a problem either. I think ur aunt is overreacting at this point. However, in some states like mine (TX) there are actually laws against this. Here u must separate them at 1 yr of age...of course it's really only enforceable if ur renting which is how I know. Several yrs ago before we bought a house and we were expecting our first child we had a one bedroom and were told that once baby was a yr we would have to move to a two bedroom in order to comply w/ the law (and then to a three if we had any more and they were opposite genders). Just FYI!

by on Oct. 22, 2013 at 11:35 PM

Because people are just down right plain stupid.  My brother and I slept in the same room for years also at times with our parents also in the room.

by on Oct. 22, 2013 at 11:40 PM

I don't see what the big deal is either!  My brother and I shared a room off and on until we were probably 4 and 6 ( don't remember for sure).  We had a small 3 bedroom house, 3 kids.  My sister is 7 years older than me and my brother is 2 years younger than me so it was so much easier for us to share a room than my sister and I due to age.  My brother and I would get sick of each other and try to kill each other so then I'd move into my sister's room for a while, etc etc lol

My kiddos will have to share a room for at least a few more years, until we can afford to buy a house.  ODS is 4 and YDS is 7 months and ODS actually loves sharing his room..for now ;)

by on Oct. 23, 2013 at 12:09 AM
The only time i could see an issue is if and when a child start to get cirious...... it could and may lead to a bigger issue. if opposit children are 5 years apart they should not be in the same room period.
by on Oct. 23, 2013 at 1:02 AM

I remember at one point in my life, I shared a room with both of my brothers. It wasn't a big deal at all! My parents and I lived in a two bedroom apartment because we were waiting for housing to open up on a military base. At the time, I was eight and my brothers were four and ten. I'm twenty-two now and we are all fine :P

by on Oct. 23, 2013 at 1:25 AM

Your aunt is an idiot.  No offense, but c'mon!  Seriously?  A newborn is going to have sexual thoughts about his big 2 yr old sister?  Pah-lease.  She's either an idiot or something else is going in her big stupid head.  :)

by on Oct. 23, 2013 at 2:31 AM

my oldest ds is 5 and youngest dd is 2. we're lucky enough to have a 3 bedroom condo, so they've never shared a room. however, i'm constantly finding my 2 year old with her pillow in her brother's bed, and i recently overheard him tell her "if you get scared, just come climb in bed with me. i'll protect you." i think it's super sweet, and have never found it cruel or creepy. 

by on Oct. 23, 2013 at 3:43 AM
Lol, funny. Is your aunt a cps worker? She sounds super anal and superficial.
by Platinum Member on Oct. 23, 2013 at 6:12 AM

I don't see a big deal with it. There will come a time when they want their own space, but until then I don't see a problem with it. Legally, now is a different story. I'm not sure at what age they require opposite sex children to have their own rooms. You'd have to look that up. I'm sure it's different depending on where you live. 

CafeMom Tickers
by on Oct. 23, 2013 at 6:30 AM
Me and dh moved to the couch and gave the girls our room. We are adding on now so we can have more rooms.
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