stepmother overstepping her bounds. am i right to be upset?
Here is the background info. I was married for eighteen years to a man I had three children with, who I loved very much but in the end he decided that having an affair with his secretary was more important than his marriage. We divorced four and a half years ago when our kids were 10, 7 and 3. I have since remarried a wonderful man who I actually attended high school with and have known most of my life and we are expecting a child in March. My exdh remarried the secretary (sigh) and they have a 2 year old.
Here's the problem. The woman thinks that she is my children;s mother, yes she has a motherly role in their lives but is secondary to my role and I have always maintained that while my children must respect her and like her that she is not their mom and if she ever made them uncomfortable or anything of the sort she was to tell their dad and then mention it to me. I also told them that in those same lines I would not hear of tattle-telling such as oh well Kara let *insert child's name here* do *X, Y, Z* over there and you told us we cant do that here. Different homes, different set of rules.
My oldest daughter, Tori is 14 now and over the summer she started her period for the first time, unfortunately for her she also had her very first experience with an ovarian cyst on two separate occasions. She spent this week with her dad (as did her siblings) and they all came home today around noon. Tori was downstairs getting lunch when I stumbled across her bag and lo and behold found a packet of birth control pills. I didn't flip out, I just calmly asked her to come up and we needed to talk. She tells me that Kara took her to the doctor on Wednesday and that she had the doc place her on BCPs to help with the ovarian cysts.
NOBODY TOLD ME. I did NOT know that anyone was taking my child to a doctor, obviously her father and stepmother have a copy of her insurance card and can take her but I would have liked to be informed before they chose to place her on birth control.
Some of you will say that it's not a big deal, but hell no this is a huge deal. I am waiting on exdh to call me back right now because I am pissed. This was a choice that should have been brought up with me first. I know that it's her body and her choice but she told me that she didn't want them in the first place but that Kara told her this was the better option and since she doesn't like to cause problems she just said okay. I asked her if she had taken them yet and she has.
What the hell!!!!