First off, you dont have to be a birth mom in order to be a mother. Raising a child makes you parent. Last night for dinner my husband and I announce we were expecting again. We already have three children. I am a SAHM. My husband and I believes that is best for OUR family. It saves us money. I had bad experience with daycare growing up. My mother was a working mom. I always felt like I never got to see her growing up. I was in daycare from 6am to 6pm. MON-SAT. Even once I arrived in grad school I still was in after school programs, and daycare in the mourning. My daycare provider took me and my sister too school. My mother picked us up from school one time. I never want that for my child. I want to my child to have more time with me as a mom. My husband grew up the same way. He was left home alone starting at the age of nine. His mother never went to one of his football games because she was working.
Anyways, at dinner my MIL says in response to our announcement, "You know that means you need to get a job."
If I didnt love my husband I would have smacked her. I kindly told her that is a decision between my husband and I. And please dont talk to me like a child in front of my children.
Of coarse that killed the jolly moment at the dinner table, and it was weird for the rest of the night.
Was my response disrespectful?
I wasnt expecting this to turn into a mom war. Im only speaking of how my and husband came to the decision to raise our children. I can only speak on how daycare was like for me growing up. I dont apologize for feeling like my mother didn't have enough time for me. There should be a BALANCE when being a working a mom. Thats one of the reasons why I left my previous job to be home with my kids.
Sacrifice. Everymom sacrifice. Being a SAHM is a sacrifice. My career is being placed on hold but its worth it to me. I rather provide daily care for my child other than strangers. Plus being abused by daycare providers growing up has made it hard for me to trust any of them. Not saying there arent any good ones. But I know by experience a mother cant see what they do when she is not there.. My point with my mother working is that it drained her to the point she had nothing left for her children emotionally. Money is important but not the only thing needed