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Britney's music is being used to tell the story of Jesus?!

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Britney Spears Music Used to Tell Story of Jesus Christ -- Yes, Really

by Jacqueline Burt

britney christWho knew the music of Britney Spears was so ... versatile?? Remember when, not very long ago, we told you about how the merchant navy blasts Britney Spears songs at top volume from military vessels to deter Somali pirates? Well, that's not the only non-dancing purpose for the pop star's hits, apparently -- tunes like "Oops! I Did It Again" and " ... Baby One More Time" are now being used to tell the story of Jesus Christ. SPEARS: The Gospel According to Britney is an original musical by Patrick Blute set to premiere November 7 in NYC, and it's being billed as possibly "the greatest story ever told to the greatest music ever written.”

Um ... HOLY SH*T. 

Perhaps your head is swimming with the implied contradictions and profound WTF-ness of this idea? Here, Blute's explanation should clear a few things up for you:

These are Britney’s lyrics. These are Jesus Christ’s images ... The Britney Spears you see is not Britney Spears. Remember that. The Jesus Christ you read is not Jesus Christ.

These are manifestations. Accounts through the media, through the words of followers, of friends, of foes, of villains, of heroes, of liars, of biases. It’s a falsehood that people believe fame and fortune create happiness. That all ‘deaths’ receive a resurrection. I hope this project will show you otherwise through the power of listening and the power of forgiveness.

Oh! Well then. Now I get it. Except, NO I DON'T GET IT AT ALL. I dunno, is it just me? Does this whole starlet/Messiah mashup concept make sense to everybody else? Maybe more playwrights should be pushing this type of envelope: GAGA: The Teachings of Gandhi as Told by Lady Gaga. YOU BETTER TWERK: Buddhism by Way of Miley Cyrus.

It's Jesus Christ, b*tch. 

And that's all I have to say about that, I think. What else IS there to say?? 

Would you buy tickets for SPEARS: The Gospel According to Britney?

by on Nov. 4, 2013 at 11:31 AM
Replies (21-30):
by Platinum Member on Nov. 4, 2013 at 1:54 PM

 I needed this laugh today, thank you! lol!

by Silver Member on Nov. 4, 2013 at 2:36 PM
Quoting Anonymous:

Christmas is coming soon, yet another secular artist wanting to bank on the commercialism of Christmas, even Katie Perry penned a Christian song on her latest CD

As contradictory as it seems. Katie perrys parent are in the ministry I think. She grew up in church and mabe is insome ways getting back to her roots somewhat. Thesong is by the grace of God. If u listen to it she is just ssying she wouldn't have pulled througb with God' s grace. I mean her hubby did end it over a text message. What a knock down.
by on Nov. 4, 2013 at 2:39 PM

lmao awesome

by on Nov. 4, 2013 at 3:04 PM

Um, what?

by on Nov. 4, 2013 at 5:07 PM

Well along with Katy Perry, Britney is a Christian too, her mom is a church member in Tennesee and Ive seen pics of those 2 together at church... Along with Kid Rock and Pamela Anderson (scary I know) lol

by Anonymous 3 on Nov. 4, 2013 at 6:05 PM

Quoting Malayahsmom06:

I would not give Britney Spears one cent of my hard earned money. I have alot of problems with her, especially in this case.

Is one of those problems not being able to spell "a lot"?

by Anonymous 4 on Nov. 4, 2013 at 7:37 PM
3 moms liked this

Yeah, because it clearly states in the bible that Jesus said:

"You wanna hot body
You wanna Bugatti
You wanna Maserati
You better work bitch".

by BEXi on Nov. 4, 2013 at 7:39 PM

It's past your bedtime, grandma.


Quoting Anonymous:

Oh well, at least she didn't make any bastard children.

by Silver Member on Nov. 4, 2013 at 7:43 PM
Sold. This sounds fantastic!
by Misty on Nov. 4, 2013 at 7:48 PM
I would totally go
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