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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

The Lie of Open Adoption. EDIT

Posted by on Nov. 4, 2013 at 4:00 PM
  • 609 Replies
3 moms liked this

Over 80% of all open adoptions are closed by the adoptive parents. This leaves some birth mothers feeling sad, empty, and deceived. They were promised the ability to have a small window into their child's life and that window is shut in their face once the parent decides allowing them contact is too big of a hassle or they get tired of sharing the child.

I read that most of these adoptions are closed before the child is 2. It seems these thiefs want a baby through what ever means necessary. And with many birth mothers wanting open adoptions, these couples are willing to lie to get their way.T o knowingly lie and deceive a mother just so she will give you her baby is disgusting. I honestly don't understand how this is not legally enforced though both criminal and civil courts unless the child is suffering in some way though the contact. 

What is your view. Do you think open adoptions should be legally enforced?

EDIT: This post is almost a week old. I will no longer be discussing it. If you wish to go back and forth with each other, have at it but don't quote me.

*If you read my post and there are mistakes in my spelling or grammar please note that I never learned either in school and I am currently learning them now. If you see a mistake POLITELY point it out and I'll be more than happy to correct my mistake. Here's a fun little siggy for your enjoyment. *

by on Nov. 4, 2013 at 4:00 PM
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Replies (1-10):
ButterMeUp
by Butters on Nov. 4, 2013 at 4:02 PM

BUMP!

ninjakids
by Christina on Nov. 4, 2013 at 4:02 PM
4 moms liked this
Yes definitely
B1Bomber
by Ruby Member on Nov. 4, 2013 at 4:03 PM
8 moms liked this

We're planning to have an open adoption, but we're adopting an older child, not a baby.

The only way I would close the adoption would be if maintaining contact with the birth family became unsafe for my daughter.

poohbearkfc
by Gold Member on Nov. 4, 2013 at 4:03 PM
Yes.
ButterMeUp
by Butters on Nov. 4, 2013 at 4:04 PM

"Do you truly believe your open adoption will stay open? Don't believe it for a second, or you will be like my family who experiences the loss of our child over and over again due to her adoptive parents wishing we were dead, and that our child was given to them as a blank slate with no identity owed to her and no promises owed to us."

ButterMeUp
by Butters on Nov. 4, 2013 at 4:04 PM

BUMP!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Nov. 4, 2013 at 4:05 PM
I still have a very open adoption 12 yrs later.
Canvas_says
by Platinum Member on Nov. 4, 2013 at 4:05 PM

I don't consider them thieves and fully understood why my cousins open adoption was closed.

MIA0223
by Emerald Member on Nov. 4, 2013 at 4:06 PM
2 moms liked this
Yes, I think all adoptions should be open.
I do not.agree with lying to the kids.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
sarah824
by Platinum Member on Nov. 4, 2013 at 4:06 PM
9 moms liked this

I always hate seeing these negative open adoption posts. We have very close family friends who have successfully adopted 3 children using open adoption and they maintain a very close, personal relationship with each of the birth parents. I always thought the way they did it was normal, but unfortunately it appears that is not the case. I know they will never close theirs unless it became unsafe for the kids.

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