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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Husband's ashes **EDIT**

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 89 Replies
My husband passed away and was cremated. He wanted his remains to go to my daughter (his stepdaughter who he helped raise from when she was 2 weeks old until his death). Fast forward a few years later, I'm with someone else. This someone else doesn't want my late husband's ashes essentially anywhere he can see them.

My daughter wants them in the living room on a side table. They are out of the way and you can barely see them. New guy is throwing a fit and says he won't have that in his home. Daughter would be devastated if I moved them.

I talked to a psychologist who said this is good for her. It helps her associate that even though he is gone, he is still part of our lives. It has made her very open to talking about his death and she seems to be very well rounded. The doctor was very adamant about me not forcing anything on here and letting her choose where the ashes go. FYI they are in a sealed wooden box.

What should I do? Should I let my daughter do what she pleases with the ashes? Or do what the boyfriend requested?

**EDIT** I am literally speaking with him about this. He feels I'm not correctly telling the story. He said she can have him anywhere else but a common living area and he's not throwing a fit.

***EDIT*** Well, seems like we have decided it's best to not continue to be in a relationship. So I suppose the problem has been solved.
Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 7, 2013 at 4:19 AM
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Replies (1-10):
MaiVal
by Silver Member on Nov. 7, 2013 at 4:21 AM
2 moms liked this

Do what your daughter wants. It means something to her, and who cares if your boyfriend is upset. He is a grown ass adult and should deal with it as such.

PoisonEyeV
by ☆ No Ragrets ☆ on Nov. 7, 2013 at 4:23 AM
4 moms liked this

I would seriously tell this new guy, we'll call him " Asshole " that he should let your daughter do what she pleases with the ashes. How is it affecting him? Tell Asshole to put on his big boy underwear and realize this is going to help your daughter...it's not about disrespecting him. 

DyerMaker
by Bronze Member on Nov. 7, 2013 at 4:25 AM

Boyfriend can deal with it. Sorry. He has no reason or right to get his shorts in a bunch over this. 

If he wants to be a jerk about this issue, I would say that is a dealbreaker right there. 

exhaustedmother
by Amy on Nov. 7, 2013 at 4:26 AM

He needs to get over it. Your daughter should be allowed to keep them where she wants-seriously its not hurting anything- tell him they stay and he can just deal with it or move on.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Nov. 7, 2013 at 4:27 AM
Are you living with him at his house? Move. If not tell bf to gtfo.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 7, 2013 at 4:28 AM
I agree with you guys but I have been made to feel like a freak. I think it's ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous. My husband is dead and he helped raise my daughter.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 7, 2013 at 4:28 AM
No, actually. We are discussing him moving in with me.


Quoting Anonymous:

Are you living with him at his house? Move. If not tell bf to gtfo.

504bbymami
by Sapphire Member on Nov. 7, 2013 at 4:29 AM
Fuck that disrespectful, selfish, immature asshole prick. If he doesn't like it then he can get the FUCK OUT!!
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Tink0711
by Silver Member on Nov. 7, 2013 at 4:30 AM
2 moms liked this
I would tell the boyfriend she is going to keep her father where she wants. If he doesn't like it, he can learn to live with it or leave.
elliesmum06
by on Nov. 7, 2013 at 4:30 AM

Why would you even have to ask? The boyfriend would have no say in the matter.

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