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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

*Sigh* MIL....

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 67 Replies

What do you guys know about adenoid removal and the reasons they're done?

My mil is the type of person who gets an idea in her head and will not let it go until she is proven right.

6 months ago she asked me "have you ever had alyssa's adenoids checked? she sounds SO stuffed up" "well....she's had a cold so she sounds a little stuffy..." "no no she sounds all nasally and you just dont hear it because you're always with her"

so being the mom who wants to be sure everything's ok with her kids, i looked it up on google before running to the dr cause i know nothing about it... and every single site i found lists reasons kids should get theirs removed...and my daughter meets NONE of the requirements. i kinda just forgot about it after that, didn't call the dr. cause i didn't feel it was anything to be concerned over. but of course when we saw my husband's parents the other day she asked about it again. i know she will not drop this and i forgot what all the symptoms were so i couldn't really tell her she was crazy. But i'm searching today and still don't feel like my daughter has any reason to talk to a dr. but mil wont drop it until i do bring it up to our pediatrician (and when i do ask at her well check and he says there's nothing to be concerned over she will say he's wrong) I don't feel like i can win this one lol. But i think i might print out some of these medical websites i'm reading and show them to her so maybe she will drop it. although i don't think she will!!

Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 8, 2013 at 8:48 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Nicoleb9
by Emerald Member on Nov. 8, 2013 at 8:51 AM
What the hell is up with all these no life, meddling ass in-laws? And why the hell are adult children still placating this kind of nonsense?
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Amy_M
by Silver Member on Nov. 8, 2013 at 8:54 AM
2 moms liked this

Um, tell her your kid is fine and to shut up already.  Why would she want her granddaughter to have a surgery she doesn't need?

seegrace
by Bronze Member on Nov. 8, 2013 at 8:57 AM
1 mom liked this

Sounds crazy!  She is your daughter and MIL needs to back off lol.  

My son had tonsils and adenoids removed.  However this was after multiple ear and throat infections.  His tonsils were always swollen.  He was always stuffy and snored loud, even at 5 yrs old. That prompted the pediatrician to send us to an ear/nose & throat doctor. The doctor did a thorough examination and noted that my sons tonsils/adenoids were not only swollen, but were different sizes.. one larger than the other. The difference in size is what cause the worry. The doctor said they should be removed and biopsied.

All was well, biopsy was negative (thank God) and my son hasn't had an ear or throat infection since.  He still snores lightly though LOL

If your daughter is healthy, I can't understand what MIL is worried about.   What a pain in the ass! 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Nov. 8, 2013 at 9:00 AM
1 mom liked this

omg these woman are rude to their MIL's , no wonder many families don't get along anymore, usually its the dil thinking she runs the family because she had a kid,it doesnt work that way.

Just remember your MIL is the matriarch of the family not you. Just state you spoke to the dr, and he feels it is not warranted now.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Nov. 8, 2013 at 9:00 AM
I had mine removed when I was little. I don't remember much other than I had to go get hearing tests done several times before I had surgery. Sounds like your daughter is fine. Good luck with MIL.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 8, 2013 at 9:01 AM

I'm glad everything was ok with your son! 

i think my mil honestly thinks she's a dr and a medical expert. and I really think she is ONLY going on how nasally my daughter sometimes sounds. But looking at the list of reasons to get them out, she NEVER has had a sinus infection, she has had 1 to 2 ear infections per year (and some years none at all, maybe 4 or 5 total and she is 4) umm...she does not have any problems breathing with her mouth closed unless she has a cold, she doesn't snore.... so yeah, i'm not worried about her at all. i just think she has a squeaky little girl voice.


Quoting seegrace:

Sounds crazy!  She is your daughter and MIL needs to back off lol.  

My son had tonsils and adenoids removed.  However this was after multiple ear and throat infections.  His tonsils were always swollen.  He was always stuffy and snored loud, even at 5 yrs old. That prompted the pediatrician to send us to an ear/nose & throat doctor. The doctor did a thorough examination and noted that my sons tonsils/adenoids were not only swollen, but were different sizes.. one larger than the other. The difference in size is what cause the worry. The doctor said they should be removed and biopsied.

All was well, biopsy was negative (thank God) and my son hasn't had an ear or throat infection since.  He still snores lightly though LOL

If your daughter is healthy, I can't understand what MIL is worried about.   What a pain in the ass! 



chefmartha
by Silver Member on Nov. 8, 2013 at 9:03 AM

When DD#2 was a baby she had fluid trapped behind her ear drums. It was causing balance, hearing and speech issues. So the ENT Dr. went and put tubes in. She said that sometimes they come out on their own early and sometimes a second set needs to be put in with the first if it doesn't drain. She said that once the ears drain and the tubes come out on their own we may not need to do anything further, or we could have to have another set put in if the fluid returns (Not inner ear infection fluid, just clear fluid), in which case her adenoids would need to be removed, possibly her tonsils as well. We did end up having a second set put in after the first set fell out and they did remove her adenoids but not her tonsils.

For us the adenoid removal was a necessary thing. DD#2 snored something terrible on top of the problems with her ears. She hasn't had a problem since then.

We were also told that the adenoids and tonsils are considered like filters and they won't remove them unless they get too big or are chronically infected. DD#2 had her last surgery 15 years ago. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 8, 2013 at 9:05 AM
4 moms liked this

where in my post did you see i was rude? i am very cordial toward my mil and i generally can have good conversations with her. i came here to vent a little because in this case i disagree with her, but that doesn't mean i'm rude to her. and she is not the matriarch of MY family. she is the matriarch of HER family. which means yes, i'll take into consideration her concerns over my kids but if there's nothing to worry about and she continues to beat it into the ground, it gets a little annoying.


Quoting Anonymous:

omg these woman are rude to their MIL's , no wonder many families don't get along anymore, usually its the dil thinking she runs the family because she had a kid,it doesnt work that way.

Just remember your MIL is the matriarch of the family not you. Just state you spoke to the dr, and he feels it is not warranted now.



Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Nov. 8, 2013 at 9:05 AM

i had my tonsils/adenoids removed when i was about 8 because i had tonsilitis and constant ear infections. if nothing is bothering your dd though, i wouldn't worry about it and just ignore your mil...let her talk about it all she wants, but you're the mom and you know best.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Nov. 8, 2013 at 9:08 AM
1 mom liked this
Its also rude for mils to stick their noses where they don't belong. If she won't drop it, I'd get upset too.


Quoting Anonymous:omg these woman are rude to their MIL's , no wonder many families don't get along anymore, usually its the dil thinking she runs the family because she had a kid,it doesnt work that way.Just remember your MIL is the matriarch of the family not you. Just state you spoke to the dr, and he feels it is not warranted now.
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