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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I could never marry a man with children.

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

I just couldn't do it... No no no.

Props to those who can! Reading these posts on here I would loose my damn mind. 

Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 10, 2013 at 6:49 PM
Replies (31-40):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 10, 2013 at 7:00 PM

I think I could handle that, but I just don't like all the double standers that go along with being the step mom... I had a step dad and he was just wonderful... I don't know how he was able to do it, but he did and now I consider him my father.

Quoting Anonymous:

I could marry a widower but not a divorcee and I wouldn't go near a guy who knocked up a girl and didn't get married.


OrangeBalloon
by Platinum Member on Nov. 10, 2013 at 7:00 PM

This is why I wouldn't do it. I would be worried that my way of doing things and his way of doing things just wouldn't mesh. It would cause fights, resentment, and host of other issues. The kids would be confused if we couldn't agree and get on the same page. I have my own way of doing things, and I wouldn't want to change it for anyone. 

Quoting Anonymous:

I dated a guy w/ a kid. I have one of my own. We were together for about 8 months. Our parenting styles are so different & it was the demise of our relationship. I am now dating a guy who does not have custody of his child. I sure do go from one extreme to the next!


Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Nov. 10, 2013 at 7:00 PM
How? There are crazy baby daddies out there.


Quoting Anonymous:

Me either!!! Tried dating a guy with kids, what a nightmare!!! I know people think its a big deal since we usually have kids as well but I think its different

Anonymous
by Anonymous 11 on Nov. 10, 2013 at 7:00 PM
And BMs that overstep with their ex.

I feel like the worst thing about being an SM is dealing with the perception of being DH's "second"-everything, because so many people witnessed and remember the "first".

Having kids with someone gives that past relationship a validity that isn't deserved.


Quoting Anonymous:

I'm not sure I could do it either. There would have to be clear boundaries set. I feel like a lot of SMs overstep.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Nov. 10, 2013 at 7:00 PM
1 mom liked this

She's expecting men who like kids who aren't their own to want to date her. Plenty of guys are uninterested in baggage. They'd be doing her a favor by steering clear, she's doing the same thing. She's leaving the men with children to find women who will love and care for their kids unconditionally. She knows that she can't do that and stays away. There's nothing wrong with that at all.


Quoting paulswifey11:

That's not silly. She's expecting double standards.

Quoting crackerjack728:

Thats silly. Everyone has their own standards.




Quoting Anonymous:

I hope all the men you become interested in feel the same way about you.



crackerjack728
by on Nov. 10, 2013 at 7:00 PM
There is no double stamdard. Every persn is different and should keep their standards whete they feel comfortable. I would never feel comfortable dating a short guy, however my husband likes short women. Its not a double standard. ....we're different people with different needs.


Quoting paulswifey11:

That's not silly. She's expecting double standards.



Quoting crackerjack728:

Thats silly. Everyone has their own standards.






Quoting Anonymous:

I hope all the men you become interested in feel the same way about you.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 10, 2013 at 7:01 PM

Because I'm not saying anything mean towards anybody, I'm not wishing anything on anybody.. I give props to those who can make it work... She's being petty and childish.

Quoting paulswifey11:

That's mean and immature but you saying that you won't date a man who has kids wasnt?

Quoting Anonymous:

/that's really mean and immature. 

Quoting Anonymous:

I hope all the men you become interested in feel the same way about you.



littlesheep
by on Nov. 10, 2013 at 7:01 PM
His kids were a big reason I decided to marry my husband in the first place. I love him but I love my stepchildren more.

It was the same way in my last marriage. Although, the dynamics were different because they were much older.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 12 on Nov. 10, 2013 at 7:01 PM

You cant help who you fall in love with, but i hear what you are saying

Anonymous
by Anonymous 10 on Nov. 10, 2013 at 7:01 PM
Same here. either that or no kids. My kids father isn't involved so that's less drama as well.


Quoting Grumpy.Cat:

I would only if the mother wasn't involved. Most of the problems with step-families seem to involve conflict between bio and step parents.


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