My husband said I'm lazy as hell and I fail the "housewife test"
We fought all weekend because we couldn't decide where to spend our weekend. He wants to sit on the couch all day and I want to take the kids out. I cook the family a big breakfast Saturday morning and he says "I'm not that hungry, so just tell me what's done now" so he can grab the cooked bacon and sit on the couch in front of his laptop. He isn't patient enough to wait 20 more minutes for me to complete the whole breakfast and put it on the table so we can all sit as a family. That was the first thing that rubbed me wrong. I ignored it because I wanted to have a good day. He is, of course, sitting on the couch, doesn't talk to anyone, just sits and googles on his laptop for 2 hours straight. I suggest we take the kids out to the play area at the mall and he says, "okay". He continues to google and sit there. I start getting ready. He sits there. I get both kids ready (as I always do alone), he sits there. I finally say, "can you get ready?" He finally gets up and gets dressed. Why do I have to constantly remind him to get ready anytime we make plans to go somewhere? He is acting like a 4th child. We leave and half way there he starts pouting. He doesn't want to go to the play area. I say, 'why didn't you tell me this at home? You said you wanted to go." He says he wants to go to the museum. I tell him he can't just change plans half way there and with our kids expecting to go to the play area. Why didn't he communicate this to me at home?
Anyway-Sunday we sat on the couch ALL DAY. I didn't want to suggest anything because I didn't want to get frustrated with him not getting ready or pouting. So I just left him alone. He never mentioned going anywhere and he chose to lay on the couch all day. Of course, on his days off I ask him to change diapers maybe once or twice. I ask him if he can help me feed the kids. Just small things. He complains that I'm lazy, I'm bossing him around, etc. I explain that I just want him to involved in the family when he's home. Im not trying to make him do everything. He says I'm lazy and I fail the housewife test. I tell him I take care of 3 kids, two under age 2 all day and night. How can I be lazy? He googles "how to be a good housewife" on his laptop and reads an article to me about the things that "good housewives do".
I say, "well maybe you should be a little more involved with the family and that's all I'm asking. Maybe sometimes I want a break from changing a diaper so all I have is you for that if you are home".
Sometimes I don't know who is right in this. Am I lazy? Or is he just a jerk and uninvolved?
It's all just so petty but it adds up when it happens everytime he's off. I'm really tired of this.