Shocked over what my son asked me last night...EDIT
I should mention that my son has autism (probably Aspergers), and that he barely spoke at the time my husband came in to the picture. He has responded so well to treatment, and he is now advanced in his expressive language. I only mention this because we obviously had no idea how much he understood when my husband came around.
So here is the point of the post: last night, when I was kissing him goodnight, my son asked, "Was Dad not around when I was a baby because you hadn't married him yet?" I was totally speechless and a bit shocked. I was unprepared so I just said, "Well, your dad and I got married two years ago and you were born five years ago." And we changed the subject.
I have always planned to be honest with my son that he has a different biological father. I just wasn't expecting it to come up at this age. He is very smart and perceptive. I just don't know how to go about explaining it to him without getting in to reproduction. He has asked how his baby sister got in my tummy, but I didn't get in to specifics obviously.
Does anyone have any advice on what words to use to appropriately explain this to a 5-year-old? I don't want to wait too long to tell him the truth because I don't want him to feel lied to and be resentful.
Just to clarify, when my son asked how his sister got in my tummy I did tell him the basics. He knows what a penis, vagina, egg, and sperm are. We just didn't talk about how the egg and sperm meet- we didn't discuss sex. I have no problem being honest, I just want to choose my words wisely because this boy has an amazing memory and I am sure he will repeat whatever I tell him at school. Sorry for the confusion.