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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

He cheated on me, so I aborted his child

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 173 Replies

When my dh and I had first met, before he was my dh, we were dating. I was living with another guy who was abusive towards me and I found comfort in the arms of another man, my future dh.

The guy I was living with and too frightened to leave, was very violent and beat me often. He would drag me around the house by my hair, kick me tie me to a bed and rape me, etc. He had a gun, and would shove it loaded in my face whenever he felt like it, threaten me with knives, push me down stairs, and tell me if I told the cops they would show up but would never find me or my body.

I got pregnant and I know it wasn't his. He broke up with me about 40 days before I got pregnant, but insisted I remain living with him. He stopped raping me but kept on beating me. I had my period, during the time and than the condom broke on me and the guy I was dating behind the abusive assholes back.

I was sick and the guy I was living with demanded I take a preg. test. I told him no way I was preg we hadn't had sex in a while and he got in my face screaming he KNEW it wasnt his if I was preg. Sure enough test came out pos. He made me tell him who the guy was torturing and beating me. I told him and he said I was to go back and tell him I was preg, it WAS his, but that the abusive guy said I will be daddy you tell him that or I will fucking get my gun and shoot him.

I knew he was telling the truth. The other guy did not know about the abuse. I told him what I was told to tell him. I said it was his, I was preg, I was going to marry the other guy and he would be dad. It broke my heart to do that, but I wanted to keep him safe and not dead. I loved him so much.

You could see his heart break when I told him, he asked me why and I just said this is what I wanted I was sorry for hurting him, etc.

Yes we were "broken up" and yes he had no clue about the abuse or this asshole making me say these things. He went online and cybered with a girl. I found out about it a couple of weeks later. He admitted it when confronted. The worst part was during this "cyber sex" he said I love you to her.

He said he didn't mean it, and she had said it first which she admitted to that. And I even got to see the conversation, where she said I love you, he said me too, not I love you. But it still hurt the same. It hurt so badly and I finally was able to leave abusive asshole and move in with my future husband. But the damage had been done. I felt I couldn't trust him. He felt like a terrible sob because I told him I was just trying to protect him.

I said I could not have a child with a man I could no longer trust, and at 2 months along I insisted, and got, an abortion. It hurt us both, he cried and begged me not to, I told him I was not willing to risk bringing a child into the world with a mom and dad who were not together and who were no longer in love. I was so hurt and it took us YEARS to get the trust back. I should have told him I know that now, but I was scared for him and the asshole was just crazy enough to end up in jail for LIFE for killing him or even both of us.

Sometimes I wish I hadn't done the abortion, but at the time everything was sooooo uncertain and scary.

That is my confession. I feel I need to just get it out, it has been pent up too long. It is sort of a relief to write it out instead of keeping it in.

Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 13, 2013 at 1:29 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 13, 2013 at 2:22 PM

bump

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 13, 2013 at 2:26 PM

chick

MummsTheWord
by on Nov. 13, 2013 at 2:29 PM
23 moms liked this

Well.....that was a bundle of messed up.

Because your future husband had pretend cyber-sex with some woman he didn't even know in person, you aborted his child????????

he admitted his piddly 'indescretion' and you abort a fetus?

After he put up with you lying about being in another terribly abusive relationship, that you were pregnant and your other boyfriend was going to raise the kid......all of that lying.....and you get so hurt over him pretending to have a one-night relationship with someone ONLINE.

Now you've held this "saved your life!" card over him...a card he NEVER knew you had to hold anyway and you're holding it over his head as if he should THANK you?

Overall, I am thankful you had the abortion: no child should be brought into this mess.

Are you that much of a hypocrite?

What a mess you created.

Mak33012
by Member on Nov. 13, 2013 at 2:32 PM
Hugs.
That is a lot for one person to have to endure. How is your relationship now? Have you been to counseling?
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 13, 2013 at 2:35 PM

 I wasn't trying to mess things up. I was truly terrified of abusive guy and I didn't know how to get out, and I do not hold it over his head. I still do not know what I could do differently. If I changed things I truly believe he would have killed one or both of us.


Quoting MummsTheWord:

Well.....that was a bundle of messed up.

Because your future husband had pretend cyber-sex with some woman he didn't even know in person, you aborted his child????????

he admitted his piddly 'indescretion' and you abort a fetus?

After he put up with you lying about being in another terribly abusive relationship, that you were pregnant and your other boyfriend was going to raise the kid......all of that lying.....and you get so hurt over him pretending to have a one-night relationship with someone ONLINE.

Now you've held this "saved your life!" card over him...a card he NEVER knew you had to hold anyway and you're holding it over his head as if he should THANK you?

Overall, I am thankful you had the abortion: no child should be brought into this mess.

Are you that much of a hypocrite?

What a mess you created.


 

gypsy_rose
by Kandy on Nov. 13, 2013 at 2:36 PM
2 moms liked this
How about hide and call the cops.


Quoting Anonymous:

 I wasn't trying to mess things up. I was truly terrified of abusive guy and I didn't know how to get out, and I do not hold it over his head. I still do not know what I could do differently. If I changed things I truly believe he would have killed one or both of us.




Quoting MummsTheWord:


Well.....that was a bundle of messed up.


Because your future husband had pretend cyber-sex with some woman he didn't even know in person, you aborted his child????????


he admitted his piddly 'indescretion' and you abort a fetus?


After he put up with you lying about being in another terribly abusive relationship, that you were pregnant and your other boyfriend was going to raise the kid......all of that lying.....and you get so hurt over him pretending to have a one-night relationship with someone ONLINE.


Now you've held this "saved your life!" card over him...a card he NEVER knew you had to hold anyway and you're holding it over his head as if he should THANK you?


Overall, I am thankful you had the abortion: no child should be brought into this mess.


Are you that much of a hypocrite?


What a mess you created.




 


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 13, 2013 at 2:37 PM

 

Now we have a great relationship. My ex the abusive jerk ended up killing his new girlfriend and is in jail for life.

Quoting Mak33012:

Hugs.
That is a lot for one person to have to endure. How is your relationship now? Have you been to counseling?


 

MummsTheWord
by on Nov. 13, 2013 at 2:40 PM
1 mom liked this


I cannot say I have been in an abusive relationship (a verbal one, but I ended that quickly) so I don't know what that terror is like......but to go through what you went through, and this guy is none the wiser because of YOUR choices, then you break his heart by saying you're having his baby but some guy he doesn't know about (abuser) is going to raise it....so he takes an evening of solace by PRETENDING online....so in mature retaliation for your hurt feelings you abort his child?

You DID have other options: sadly, your personal fears kept you from making many wiser decisions.

Glad you could get it off your chest, though.

I just think YOU were the person who was waaaaay out of line in this entire scenario.

Quoting Anonymous:

 I wasn't trying to mess things up. I was truly terrified of abusive guy and I didn't know how to get out, and I do not hold it over his head. I still do not know what I could do differently. If I changed things I truly believe he would have killed one or both of us.


Quoting MummsTheWord:

Well.....that was a bundle of messed up.

Because your future husband had pretend cyber-sex with some woman he didn't even know in person, you aborted his child????????

he admitted his piddly 'indescretion' and you abort a fetus?

After he put up with you lying about being in another terribly abusive relationship, that you were pregnant and your other boyfriend was going to raise the kid......all of that lying.....and you get so hurt over him pretending to have a one-night relationship with someone ONLINE.

Now you've held this "saved your life!" card over him...a card he NEVER knew you had to hold anyway and you're holding it over his head as if he should THANK you?

Overall, I am thankful you had the abortion: no child should be brought into this mess.

Are you that much of a hypocrite?

What a mess you created.





Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 13, 2013 at 2:41 PM

 

He had threatened me out of that. He would offer me the phone, tell me to go ahead and call, and promise me that I would be DEAD by the time the cops showed up. In fact, the girlfriend he had after me, that is how she died. She called, and he had killed her within the 7 minutes it took the police to show up. And hide? Hide where? He had a small apartment, and I was only allowed out for work. He knew my schedule, and would call to check up on me. I only had time with the new guy, my future husband, because he lived next door to the place I worked, and we only saw each other if I got off early and only until the time the asshole was to pick me up. He was VERY controlling. And had a gun/knife/ etc.

Quoting gypsy_rose:

How about hide and call the cops.


Quoting Anonymous:

 I wasn't trying to mess things up. I was truly terrified of abusive guy and I didn't know how to get out, and I do not hold it over his head. I still do not know what I could do differently. If I changed things I truly believe he would have killed one or both of us.


 


Quoting MummsTheWord:


Well.....that was a bundle of messed up.


Because your future husband had pretend cyber-sex with some woman he didn't even know in person, you aborted his child????????


he admitted his piddly 'indescretion' and you abort a fetus?


After he put up with you lying about being in another terribly abusive relationship, that you were pregnant and your other boyfriend was going to raise the kid......all of that lying.....and you get so hurt over him pretending to have a one-night relationship with someone ONLINE.


Now you've held this "saved your life!" card over him...a card he NEVER knew you had to hold anyway and you're holding it over his head as if he should THANK you?


Overall, I am thankful you had the abortion: no child should be brought into this mess.


Are you that much of a hypocrite?


What a mess you created.


 


 



 

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 13, 2013 at 2:41 PM
5 moms liked this

You can always spot the trolls by the unnecessary details...FYI

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