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I'm at the end of my rope with him

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 16 Replies

I'm taking my 9yo ds in for a psychiatric evaluation when DH gets home from work.  I feel terrible but I don't know what else to do :(  He is completely out of control. They think he's bi-polar but haven't diagnosed him because he's so young. It's gotten to the point where i'm afraid to leave him alone and i'm afraid to have him around my other children. I had my mom take him to get him out until dh gets home. Does anyone else have any experience with this?

Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 15, 2013 at 8:52 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Cmgmqmmom
by Ruby Member on Nov. 15, 2013 at 8:53 PM
I'm sorry, I don't.
Good luck, here's a bump.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 15, 2013 at 8:54 PM


Thank you

Quoting Cmgmqmmom:

I'm sorry, I don't.
Good luck, here's a bump.



Tasloley
by Bronze Member on Nov. 15, 2013 at 8:57 PM
No, sorry! :(
BekahBrownEyes
by NoLies on Nov. 15, 2013 at 8:59 PM
I haven't yet, but I will soon. My ex and I agree that my son needs someone to talk to. See I've got cancer, it came back the year he was born. He's seen mommy really sick. He's seen me in the hospital. I know it's not easy for him. I am hoping his evaluation & therapy will be helpful to him. I hope you find some answers mama.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 15, 2013 at 9:02 PM


Thank you. That has to be really hard on you. I had some pretty severe health problems this past year and I know it was hard for the kids to process. His dad also died recently so it's just been a crap storm for him this year. I really hope they help him. Best of luck with your situation!

Quoting BekahBrownEyes:

I haven't yet, but I will soon. My ex and I agree that my son needs someone to talk to. See I've got cancer, it came back the year he was born. He's seen mommy really sick. He's seen me in the hospital. I know it's not easy for him. I am hoping his evaluation & therapy will be helpful to him. I hope you find some answers mama.



Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 15, 2013 at 9:07 PM

as a matter of fact, my oldest child has bipolar disorder and it started showing symptoms around the same age, right when puberty was starting to peek around the corner.

I wish I had some great advice for you, but it took years and years of therapy, tears, effort, love, hope, begging, and any other emotion you can think of, any kind of treatment you could imagine, any suggestion from social workers, doctors, counselors, etc., and nothing really helped much.  he had to get to the point where he was an adult, when there were real consequences for his behaviors and actions, before he really started to be able to work through his triggers.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 15, 2013 at 9:10 PM


How did you cope with having him in the home? Did you have other children to worry about? I feel like his behavior is tearing my family apart . It's not fair to my other kids to have this kind of chaos. 

Quoting Anonymous:

as a matter of fact, my oldest child has bipolar disorder and it started showing symptoms around the same age, right when puberty was starting to peek around the corner.

I wish I had some great advice for you, but it took years and years of therapy, tears, effort, love, hope, begging, and any other emotion you can think of, any kind of treatment you could imagine, any suggestion from social workers, doctors, counselors, etc., and nothing really helped much.  he had to get to the point where he was an adult, when there were real consequences for his behaviors and actions, before he really started to be able to work through his triggers.



Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 15, 2013 at 9:20 PM

unfortunately, his behavior escalated to the point where his remaining in the home was not in the best interest of anyone.  yes, we have two other children and the unpredictability was awful.  he was having issues with public school at the same time, so he was happy to transfer to a private school, they boarded after 8th grade.  he asked to go to summer school, they do a ton of fun stuff in addition to a few hours of class a day.  when he was getting ready to graduate, he called me and asked if I would be upset if he didn't move back home after school.  I told him I wanted him to be happy, and if he wasn't in a place yet where he could follow the rules of our home then that was probably the best solution.

he's grown up a lot in the last year and a half, though he has a long way to go.  he's finally mature enough to listen to my suggestions instead of just thinking I'm being a bitch to kill his joy.  and when he visits for the weekend or whatever, he's suddenly again become the respectful, fun, clever boy I missed so much during his teen years.  and we can talk as adults now, and while he was here a couple of weeks ago he said himself that while he wished he lived in our town that he wasn't ready to follow the rules of our house.  self-awareness is a huge step for him, and I'll be happy for every little bit of growth I see.

 

Quoting Anonymous:

 

How did you cope with having him in the home? Did you have other children to worry about? I feel like his behavior is tearing my family apart . It's not fair to my other kids to have this kind of chaos. 

Quoting Anonymous:

as a matter of fact, my oldest child has bipolar disorder and it started showing symptoms around the same age, right when puberty was starting to peek around the corner.

I wish I had some great advice for you, but it took years and years of therapy, tears, effort, love, hope, begging, and any other emotion you can think of, any kind of treatment you could imagine, any suggestion from social workers, doctors, counselors, etc., and nothing really helped much.  he had to get to the point where he was an adult, when there were real consequences for his behaviors and actions, before he really started to be able to work through his triggers.

 

 

 

 

ivegotrhythm
by Gold Member on Nov. 15, 2013 at 9:28 PM
Wow. That must have been really hard for you to make those decisions.

I'm glad he's doing so much better now!


Quoting Anonymous:

unfortunately, his behavior escalated to the point where his remaining in the home was not in the best interest of anyone.  yes, we have two other children and the unpredictability was awful.  he was having issues with public school at the same time, so he was happy to transfer to a private school, they boarded after 8th grade.  he asked to go to summer school, they do a ton of fun stuff in addition to a few hours of class a day.  when he was getting ready to graduate, he called me and asked if I would be upset if he didn't move back home after school.  I told him I wanted him to be happy, and if he wasn't in a place yet where he could follow the rules of our home then that was probably the best solution.


he's grown up a lot in the last year and a half, though he has a long way to go.  he's finally mature enough to listen to my suggestions instead of just thinking I'm being a bitch to kill his joy.  and when he visits for the weekend or whatever, he's suddenly again become the respectful, fun, clever boy I missed so much during his teen years.  and we can talk as adults now, and while he was here a couple of weeks ago he said himself that while he wished he lived in our town that he wasn't ready to follow the rules of our house.  self-awareness is a huge step for him, and I'll be happy for every little bit of growth I see.


 


Quoting Anonymous:


 


How did you cope with having him in the home? Did you have other children to worry about? I feel like his behavior is tearing my family apart . It's not fair to my other kids to have this kind of chaos. 


Quoting Anonymous:


as a matter of fact, my oldest child has bipolar disorder and it started showing symptoms around the same age, right when puberty was starting to peek around the corner.


I wish I had some great advice for you, but it took years and years of therapy, tears, effort, love, hope, begging, and any other emotion you can think of, any kind of treatment you could imagine, any suggestion from social workers, doctors, counselors, etc., and nothing really helped much.  he had to get to the point where he was an adult, when there were real consequences for his behaviors and actions, before he really started to be able to work through his triggers.


 


 


 


 


Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 15, 2013 at 9:39 PM

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I would love to get my 4 year old son evaluated he's what we refer to as our "spirited" child. He escapes the house any chance he gets. Even if I'm just driving 5 miles away he will unbuckle himself while I'm driving and walk around my mini van I'm constantly having to pull over so he can buckle back up. He once redecorated a friends house in 4 min flat with a sharpie marker which included him writing on his baby brothers face! While two adults and 4 other children were in the room & nobody saw him! He jumps climbs crawls on top of the fridge! I have to lock him in his room at night, double gate areas I want to keep him out of! And I take the extra material from the latch tether to tie him into his carseat! He is completely out of control my other two children are normal. And he's so smart that now when he does something wrong he just looks at me and bats his big blueberry eyes and says I'm so sorry mommy I promise I won't do that again, your very pretty I love you mommy! How the hell do I get mad at him!!!! Ugh I hear ya my rope is fraying and I'm trying hard to keep it together.
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