When I bought a new comforter for 4YO DD a few months ago I kept the big plastic bag it came in to hold some of her stuffed animals.
Since then, I have caught her putting the bag over her head a few times.
I tell her to stop. She listens. A few days/weeks later I will see her do it again.
She has a 1 YO sister. She CAN NOT TEACH SISTER TO PUT PLASTIC OVER HER HEAD.
Today ODD was facetime-ing with my mom and put the damn bag over her head as a funny joke. I told her "Get that off your head now. Go put it in the garbage." She listened. When she came back over to the ipad I asked her why she wasn't allowed to put plastic over her head. She said "because I can die." I asked how she would die and she said "I don't know." So I told her the plastic could get stuck on her face and she wouldn't be able to breathe.
I have explained this before but since she wasn't getting it, I told her I was going to show her what I meant, and I plugged her nose and covered her mouth with my hand. She giggled for a second before she got scared. Even when she started to pull my hand off, I kept it over her mouth for another second.
When I let go, she was scared and started to cry a little bit, so I snuggled her up and held her and said "Wasn't that scary? Wouldn't it be terrible if you or baby sister got plastic stuck to your face? Are you ever going to put a bag over your head?" She answered appropriately and snuggled me back and went back to dancing in front of my mom, who was watching the whole thing.
Well apparently, according to my mother, what I did was wrong, "almost abuse", and I shouldn't have "scared her" that way. My mom was actually angry, which REALLY surprised me because I swear I vaguely remember her doing the same thing to me when I was young.
I stand by what I did and would do it again in an instant. DD needs to know that it's actually dangerous, not just for her but for sister who copies EVERYTHING she does.
So, CM, was what I did "mean" or "abusive"? Or would you have done the same thing?
When are some times you've taught by showing? Or do you rely on your words to get the meaning across?
EDIT: Yeah, I should have taken the bag away after the second incident. But it wasn't a thin bag, it was the thick plastic type from a comforter and had a sturdy zipper and a little handle. It was a cool bag and definitely wouldn't have ever actually obstructed all of her breathing pathways, even if she pressed the thing against her face and sucked in.
But the "no plastic bags on the head" rule is a hard-and-fast one, because I'm not always going to be around her, and though I keep my house picked up and plastic bags including ziplocs up and out of reach, I can't guarantee my girls won't run across a plastic bag and decide it might be funny to try it on. I can guarantee my sweet girl who trusts me to protect her (and understood I was showing her in order to protect her) will not put a plastic bag on her head again.