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UGH unless you are going to be paying my rent DONT tell me where I can live!

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
so I am 26 and finally saved enough money to move out of my moms. (long story short every time I would start saving something would go wrong on my moms house and she wouldn't have the money to pay it so my savings would have to pay for repairs or new appliances on top of me paying her 400 a month in rent) anyway, I am very low income and I found an apartment that includes utilities and internet that is in my price range (by not paying utilities I can afford 100 more in rent) the down side being it is near a few halfway houses and isn't in the best neighborhood. rhe apartment complex is secure (gates you need either a code or magkey to get in, security doors etc) well I was.telling my mom that I really liked the apartment, that I could afford it, etc and that I was thinking about moving there when they have an opening. all she said was "you are not moving my grandson into THAT neighborhood." ok.... then.she starts listing all these apartments that are 700-800 a month for a one to two bedroom that are crazy expensive and then mentioned her friends that have apartments in a worse neighborhood than what I was looking at before. she is acting like she is happy I am finally going to be a grown up again and live on my own after getting back on my feet yet she wants me to do it on her terms. she wants to pick the neighborhood and the apartment for me. well im sorry that's not going to happen. it may suck right now but I will be able to move somewhere better eventually.
Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 28, 2013 at 9:28 AM
Replies (31-40):
pce68
by Patti on Nov. 28, 2013 at 10:28 AM

The complex sounds like it takes precautions to try and make it as safe as possible. I have lived in neighborhoods that were not always the best before, bc it was what I could afford, and as long as you are not letting your child run unsupervised outside he should be fine. Your mom will get over it. Do what you have to do.

teaandcookies
by Bronze Member on Nov. 28, 2013 at 10:29 AM

For christmas, you need to ask for a 12 cup slow cooker, and a pressure cooker, and a vac sealer.  The hardest part is going to be getting healty meals done for dinner.  Every second saturday of the month, or when you get your baby bonus, make that you cooking day.  Have care set up so you can cook all day, cool and fill your frezzer.  the night before pull out of frezzer, place in fridge, and heat .  Soups, chillies, stews, and casserols all can be done very very cheap.  All my neighbors bring me their bones ( pork, beef and chicken)  I have a frezzer bag for each.  Once you have enought boil for 4 hours on slow boil, and their is your starter.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 28, 2013 at 10:33 AM
Then do what you need to do! Just make smart choices and get what you need to keep yourself safe. I'm sure you will LOVE being on your own!
My parents owned a thrift store, one was located right by a halfway house. There were NO sex offenders allowed but they were all criminals and the majority had an addiction to either alcohol, drugs or both. There were some ugly things that happened there. The homeless shelter was also right by them, they did A LOT for the homeless people so they were considered off limits, nobody was allowed to mess with them. It was crazy and them being there always freaked me out!

Quoting Anonymous:

the one she is worried about is the work release one. there is a school on the block so no sex offenders. I see your point, I really do. but honestly staying with her is NOT an option.



Quoting Anonymous:

Then you need to be in a better financial place. As a single mom you will be a target. The gate is irrelevant, if someone wants in, they're getting in.


Halfway houses are a HUGE red flag, it's either criminals or drug addicts or both. Do you know if they house sex offenders? You would never really be safe. All it takes is for ONE of those halfway house guests to reoffend and a woman with a baby is an easy target. Keep your kid safe and stay with your mom.





Quoting Anonymous:

I don't want to live there, but I need to move out on my own.







Quoting Texascandee:

As a mother to a grown daughter and a grandmother to a 10 old young man, I wouldn't want my daughter moving into a bad neighborhood either.  I know young adults think they know it all and what's best but sometimes it would  behoove you to listen to your mother because they do want what's best for you and your child.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Nov. 28, 2013 at 10:40 AM
thank you for the tips :) I have a bread maker and a crock pot etc that my sons other grandma gave me when my ds was a baby (he will be 7 next month) so I am hoping to stock up on things I can make in the crock.

Quoting teaandcookies:

For christmas, you need to ask for a 12 cup slow cooker, and a pressure cooker, and a vac sealer.  The hardest part is going to be getting healty meals done for dinner.  Every second saturday of the month, or when you get your baby bonus, make that you cooking day.  Have care set up so you can cook all day, cool and fill your frezzer.  the night before pull out of frezzer, place in fridge, and heat .  Soups, chillies, stews, and casserols all can be done very very cheap.  All my neighbors bring me their bones ( pork, beef and chicken)  I have a frezzer bag for each.  Once you have enought boil for 4 hours on slow boil, and their is your starter.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Nov. 28, 2013 at 11:09 AM
If your low income or as you say very low income then how do you pay 400 plus utilities plus save m money? Sounds like your just trying to get us to agree with you. Stay home.. get a better job and don't move your kid into the slums wait till you can really afford it
CuriousArentYa
by Platinum Member on Nov. 28, 2013 at 11:12 AM

Sounds to me like mom doesn't want you to move out. She is probably trying to figure out how she will pay her bills. She doesn't sound very responsible. 

So_Devious20
by Misha Lovegood<3 on Nov. 28, 2013 at 11:13 AM
Don't think because you are gated in you are safe. A lot of people give those codes out to friends, delivery guys, and so on.
I hooe you get it all figured out though. Good luck
AJsMom81507
by Silver Member on Nov. 28, 2013 at 11:20 AM

but she isnt homeless, she has a place to stay rght now

Quoting tardistraveller:

there isn't always a choice.

I did it at one point, and we are fine now.

You have to live where you can afford.

Quoting AJsMom81507:

uhm, i would NEVER want to put my children in a dangerous neighborhood.  i agreee somewhat with your mother.



tardistraveller
by on Nov. 28, 2013 at 11:42 AM

who knows what issues there are. I would rather my independance tbh.  

Quoting AJsMom81507:

but she isnt homeless, she has a place to stay rght now

Quoting tardistraveller:

there isn't always a choice.

I did it at one point, and we are fine now.

You have to live where you can afford.

Quoting AJsMom81507:

uhm, i would NEVER want to put my children in a dangerous neighborhood.  i agreee somewhat with your mother.




 


dotsicle
by on Nov. 28, 2013 at 11:57 AM

Move out on your own. You will like it, even though the neighborhood may not be the best. I had to live in some questionable neighborhoods but nobody ever bothered my kids. You gotta live where you can afford. And don't let your mom borrow money from you, after you move. You'll be paying her bills for the rest of your life, and she won't pay any back.

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