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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

we flat out did not get invited anywhere for T-day this year. ETA some f.a.q.s and clarification.

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
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2 moms liked this

My dad never filled me in on when their t-day was going to be when I asked him, by the time I found out by asking my other family (since he wasnt going to tell me) it was too late to make plans to get there (6 hours away and they did it the first weekend of NOV this year)

MIL went to her new boyfriend's family, a week ago she asked what our plans were and when we said we didnt make any and we just assumed she was hosting it like every other year she was just like "oh, just wondering" and then called us the day before to say where she was going and "Sorry I'm not doing anythign, maybe another day..." NO, I can't I have to WORK every other day but thanks for letting us know ahead of time. BIL went to his gf's family.

My mom had a big get together at her new house, but I'm not welcome there because of her husband (and frankly I wouldnt have gone even if I were) All the other family I have around here went to that of course. No one even mentioned it at all, except G.ma when we were talking about the house coming along "oh they want to have it ready to do a big family thanksgiving in" 

It was a kind of depressing holiday. I wasnt cooking an entire feast for DH, Me, and two preschoolers. So we just kind of hung out like any other day. 


ETA to clear a few things up- I totally admit to my fault in the not knowing when my Dad's Thanksgiving was... My dad is such a recluse I should have known to just ask my aunt first... They have nothing wrong with me and we were all disappointed when we realized I wasnt going to be able to go. We will be going down sometime between now and mid january, maybe even Christmas if the weather looks alright. 

MIL- she is in LOOOOOOOOVEEEE (lol. too cute) and I guess it was a last minute invite for her to go meet his family. Whatever... just kind of sucks because last month we were talking with her about thanksgiving and while we never got an invitation we all just assumed we were going there. Im happy she went to his family's house. I guess her and the mother took some baskets to shut-ins... +100 for humanity right there.

My mom- Her husband is a sick pervert who molested his daughters from toddlerhood to puberty. Including me. Like I said, I wouldnt have gone over there even if I were invited... but after the investigation it was made clear I was NOT included in "THEIR" family any longer. At least before the investigation they tried to include me, and some of my aunts/uncles (because I still thought of them as family) still had a relationship with me. They pretend my sisters arent included "because they live so far away" but we all know it would be the same with them even if they lived next door. So that wasnt so much about not being invited, as much as it was a reminder that my mom has always and will always choose him over me, and so will the rest of my "family" 

As far as what we did... we did have a nice dinner, but no where near what Thanksgiving "expects"... We played board games and shopped online for my sisters' kids. We did have a good time... I guess I had been using MIL as a crutch to get me through the holidays without my family, and this year was good for me to learn to do it myself and start my own thing. 

Yes, it was a pity party, but damn ladies... I really didnt think I was THAT wrong in feeling a little bummed out. 

Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 29, 2013 at 8:48 AM
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Replies (1-10):
blessed107
by Ruby Member on Nov. 29, 2013 at 8:50 AM
2 moms liked this

Those are the breaks.

MistyMoo
by Ruby Member on Nov. 29, 2013 at 8:51 AM
That sucks.
emilysmom8
by Platinum Member on Nov. 29, 2013 at 8:52 AM
47 moms liked this

 I dont see why you couldnt make a small thanksgiving dinner for your family? No one ever said you had to be invited somewhere...

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Nov. 29, 2013 at 8:52 AM
5 moms liked this
It's still fun toake a turkey and such, you're the grown up now. :) Try it.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Nov. 29, 2013 at 8:52 AM

Why do you think no one invited you anywhere or told you about what was going on?

Jessy76
by Gold Member on Nov. 29, 2013 at 8:53 AM

That's a bummer I am sorry you had a not so good Thanks Giving. Sounds like it's time to start some holiday traditions of your own. Next year you could do the feast for your family just on a smaller scale. Maybe instead of buying a whole Turkey you just get a turkey breast and then do the sides that your family likes and just enjoy a day of being together.

ivegotrhythm
by Gold Member on Nov. 29, 2013 at 8:55 AM
4 moms liked this
Last year we had no where to go, so we had Chinese and went to a movie.

My son swears it was the best Thanksgiving ever!

You can make it special and about YOUR family without a feast.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 29, 2013 at 8:55 AM

I didnt say we didnt so a small dinner... Just not a giant feast, it was a simple, meat and two sides and a salad with pie kind of meal

We know we didnt need to be invited anywhere... I come from a huge family though, and this was really the first holiday we spent by ourselves. So it was totally different and quiet, I found it a little depressing. 

Quoting emilysmom8:

 I dont see why you couldnt make a small thanksgiving dinner for your family? No one ever said you had to be invited somewhere...


JulyBabies
by Gold Member on Nov. 29, 2013 at 8:55 AM

That's sad. But you should not have let it stop you from celebrating with your own family. Next time, make a traditional dinner and make it feel like a holiday, I am sure it would have made you feel better. 

B1Bomber
by Ruby Member on Nov. 29, 2013 at 8:57 AM
3 moms liked this

You should have invited people over. No one invited us anywhere, but we had my inlaws, one of DH's coworkers, and two recruits from boot camp.

There are always people who have nowhere to go for the holidays. Find them and have them over.

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