I have 3 kids....9 year old twins and a 4 year old.
My Dad ADORES the twins and wants to keep them every Friday. Awesome. I don't go out or do anything, because DH has to work on Saturdays, but they enjoy it, so I'm happy to let them go.
The problem is, my 4 year old NEVER gets to go. They won't take her, even for a couple of hours. And that hurts her feelings. I feel bad for her, because she gets left out a lot. Now that basketball season is in, they won't let her come over at all because "they want to watch their game". She wants to have a relationship with my Dad and stepmom and they won't let her. My MIL lives out of state, but even when she was here, she had nothing to do with DD because she and DH don't get along and my mom lives out of state, but if she DID live here, she'd be active in all 3 kids' lives.
I don't want to punish my kids by not letting them go to my Dad's, but I am getting sick of DD getting left behind.
The real kicker? They just live across the main street from me. It is LITERALLY a 2 minute walk from my house to theirs. And I try to take DD over there at other times, but they always have some excuse, like they are tired and need a nap or my step mom has a headache.
DD is really well behaved, but she isn't as self sufficient as my older two.
What should I do?
I am going to talk to my Dad today and point out that, though they may not realize it, my 4 year old is hurting that they don't take her. I'm going to let them know that I don't want nor expect them to keep her overnight, but that they need to start including her a little bit more, maybe let her come over without the other two for a hour or so.
She's a great kid. Very entertaining and funny. But yes, she does require more attention than the other two. However, my Dad and stepmom aren't exactly ready for the nursing home. My Dad is 57 and my stepmom is around 50.
For those that may not think I care, I DO care, obviously. I just want to try to avoid hurting ANY of the kids, so I came here looking for some advice. Stupid, I know, considering the group, but whatever. Thank you to those that DID offer me advice. I appreciate it.
So, I talked to them. It went well. They said they didn't realize that she was noticing and have agreed to let her have her own time with them. So they took her for a couple of hours today, while the twins where here with me. (they also hyped her up on cake and ice cream) and they offered to take all 3 tomorrow so DH and I could go to the movies, their treat as a gift to me (my birthday is this week).