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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Grandparents are not free childcare!

Posted by on Dec. 10, 2013 at 2:16 PM
  • 750 Replies
67 moms liked this

I have seen many posts recently with women bitching that their mothers, or MILs want to charge, or limit, or God forbid say NO to watching their children on a consistent basis....as a replacement for daycare.

I am not talking about once in a blue moon, or for date nights or emergencies.....they are complaining about not receiving free consistent childcare while the mother is working or doing whatever else she does.

When did grandparents become FREE childcare?  They did not have those babies, YOU DID....and while it is a nice gesture for them to help out from time to time they are certainly under NO obligation to babysit your child at ANY time for nothing.

My first grandbaby is due in April.  Will I help out my son and his gf?  Yep.  But I am not, and will not, be a complete replacement for daycare for a child they chose to have.  

Grandparents have lives and they raised their babies.  Why are they responsible for also raising yours?

The entitlement astounds me.

Edit:  I am reading through the replies and cannot for the life of me understand why NOT being a daycare makes you an "unloving or uninvolved grandparent."  You can be a VERY involved grandparent, a loving, spoiling grandparent, and NOT be a daycare.  Many people view this as all or nothing, if you don't take the kids all the time....well you don't love your grandkids.   That's crazy.

Edit #2:  For clarity I reworded the beginning.  Some folks were confused.


by on Dec. 10, 2013 at 2:16 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Raeann11
by Ruby Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 2:16 PM
1 mom liked this

Just the way some are.

Devious333
by Ruby Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 2:17 PM
5 moms liked this
Dh and I don't go out often (maybe 5 times a year, at the most) because we don't want to bug his parents much. They have their own lives.
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JaeMommy07
by Gold Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 2:18 PM

I agree. My in-laws love watching our dd but only do so about 2-3x a week. They want time to themselves too.

SweetPea2004
by Platinum Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 2:18 PM
15 moms liked this

My mom is 100% okay with my dd coming over any time and for as long as she wants, for FREE. 

sugarcrisp
by Ruby Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 2:19 PM
4 moms liked this

I agree.

But I'm lucky. My mom refuses to charge, although I pretty much never ask for her to watch my son anymore. She used to watch him 4 days a week, about 3hrs per day, and refused to take money from me. She LOVED that time with him. I did, however, do extra things to try to show my gratitude, like taking her out to lunch, bringing stuff over and making dinner with her, etc. Her watching him 16hrs/wk was not the equivalent to her raising him, however.


lalaboosh
by on Dec. 10, 2013 at 2:19 PM
1 mom liked this
I think it's weird to charge to watch your grandkids once in a while, but if it's every work day it's to be expected.

I'm a bit irritated that my inlaws wanted to watch my daughter every week when she was a baby, but have only seen my son like 5 times.
Outspoken.Mime
by Platinum Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 2:20 PM
11 moms liked this

Thats great, but that is her CHOICE.  You are not entitled to it.

Quoting SweetPea2004:

My mom is 100% okay with my dd coming over any time and for as long as she wants, for FREE. 


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Dec. 10, 2013 at 2:20 PM
8 moms liked this

My mil found out I was going to put my lo in daycare and she shit a brick and told me over her dead body and that I better bring her grandson to her or she wasn't going to make me any more salsa and chicken strips. Hes a little over a year old now and shes kept him since he was 6weeks lol.

ablox
by Bronze Member on Dec. 10, 2013 at 2:20 PM

My parents watch dd 2 days a week but mostly because they want too. My mom practically falls out if one of us is off and she isn't coming over.

olivia_benson
by on Dec. 10, 2013 at 2:21 PM

My inlaws live 8 hours away and they wish they could babysit him more, lol

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