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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Downs syndrome, a spin off, from the other side

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My 5 year old has downs. Everywhere we go, people assume he's always happy, loving, affectionate. I've had strangers in stores hug or touch him without asking.
How am I, doing my best to teach him personal space, supposed to explain that that to him? He has the mentality of a 2 year old.
This also happens to us at hospitals, doctors, people who really should know better. Why are all these nurses and doctors hugging my son? Yes, he's super cute, yes, he's young. But soon that will all catch up to him.
So tell me, how can I help this issue, when so much is against me??
I've asked people to please not touch him, but by then, they've already done it. And I do watch him but if I turn around for a minute, because my son is in a cart or stroller, I should not have to expect him to be bothered by (probably) the same grown up who would flip out if he was 15 and touched them without permission.
Unless you have been in my shoes, you have no right to judge
by on Dec. 17, 2013 at 10:24 AM
Replies (471-475):
michele115
by Member on Dec. 24, 2013 at 6:21 AM

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Honestly this happens to us all the time too. My son is 3 also DS. At bass pro shop a cashier just ran up to us to pick him up and snuggle him. He was crying but still. I just try to see it as a positive. These people are so loving towards him when the world can be so cruel to our children so I just smile and let him make people happy.
britmichele
by on Dec. 24, 2013 at 11:20 AM
Then how are you going to teach him that strangers are dangerous? This isn't safe. I don't think that's safe


Quoting michele115:

Mobile Photo

Honestly this happens to us all the time too. My son is 3 also DS. At bass pro shop a cashier just ran up to us to pick him up and snuggle him. He was crying but still. I just try to see it as a positive. These people are so loving towards him when the world can be so cruel to our children so I just smile and let him make people happy.
AmiJanell
by Silver Member on Dec. 24, 2013 at 11:36 AM
That is weird... I wonder why anyone would think its okay to touch, let alone HUG someone's child. Although, he is pretty stinkin' cute!
People used to touch my sons hair all if the time when he was a toddler (white blond curls) and I thought it was odd that strangers felt compelled to touch him.
Hopefully as your son gets older people will just stop... I think sometimes when they are so young, others forget they are people with personal space and boundaries.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 71 on Dec. 24, 2013 at 11:39 AM
How could someone not want to hug him???? Just look at him!!! Hes sooo freakin cute!!!!!!!
slms227
by on Dec. 30, 2013 at 7:24 AM

Okay, seriously, people? After sitting down and reading every single response to this post, I have to say that some of your responses have left me absolutely stunned. OP, while I do not have a child with Down syndrome, I do have a nephew who has it. Like your son, he's absolutely adorable, and people come up and hug him ALL THE TIME.

While I think it's great that some of you are coming up with great slogans to put on T-shirts or buttons with some variation of "please don't hug me," why should she have to dress her son in clothing that differentiates him from any other "normal" kid? How is that okay? It seems pretty simple to me: People shouldn't touch other people's children without permission. Ever. It is NEVER okay to randomally hug or touch someone else's child, regardless of how adorable they are or whether or not they have special needs. It is difficult enough to teach children without special needs about boundaries and what types of physical affection are and are not okay to both display and accept, and in most cases with special needs, it is even more difficult. 

As for "amazzonia," the woman who kept saying that she should just be grateful that people want to love on her son....are you fing kidding me? You're really teaching your daughters that it's normal and perfectly okay to accept physical affection from random strangers? Have you not heard of "stranger danger"? I cannot even fathom teaching my children that is acceptable for strangers to hug and touch them, and I truly do not understand how you can teach yours that it is.



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