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I'm a failure as a mother and I wish I was told about other options when pregnant.

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 13 Replies
First off, I'm a younger than average mom. I'm a full time college student and single. Ex gets DD every other weekend and I just texted him in the midst of breaking down.

My DD is 2 years old. She is TERRIBLE at listening to directions. When I tell her not to say/do something she either giggles and says "shut up" or screams "I WILL DO IT" and if I ask her to do something (pick up toys, eat, lay down, etc) I'm immediately told "I DON'T WANT TO". I've tried the corner. I've tried taking things away.. All while telling her that she doesn't say those things to mommy. I've even spanked her a few times. I asked EX if she is that way with him and he said she was ONE TIME and he spanked her and she doesn't act that way anymore. I don't understand why my spank would be any different. I'm just at wits end and have no clue what to do. She's a good kid around others and when she plays on her own, she has great manners and she is smart.. I just don't get why she doesn't want to listen to me. :( It breaks my heart so much I'm even crying while typing this, ugh.
Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 30, 2013 at 11:11 PM
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Replies (1-10):
momma2mms
by Kristin on Dec. 30, 2013 at 11:14 PM
3 moms liked this

She's 2!! Little ones take it out on the ones they love most. It will get better. Stay consistent.

alexsmomma06
by Ruby Member on Dec. 30, 2013 at 11:14 PM
2 moms liked this
Because you are not making her listen. Kids learn very early what they can get away with. Be more firm with her, don't back down, set ground rules and follow them
lnrmom
by on Dec. 30, 2013 at 11:18 PM
1 mom liked this
This. Honey, she's testing her boundaries. Let her know exactly where those boundaries are and be consistent. If she doesn't do what she is told, make her do it.

Quoting alexsmomma06: Because you are not making her listen. Kids learn very early what they can get away with. Be more firm with her, don't back down, set ground rules and follow them
Lelly11
by Member on Dec. 30, 2013 at 11:27 PM
My 2 year old is the same way. I tell her to pick up her toys as well and she doesn't listen she says I don't want too. I try being strict with her so she can listen I tell her if she doesn't pick up her toys ima throw them in the trash. I have thrown a few of her toys away right in front of her I told her that's for not picking up her toys so now when she doesn't listen I tell her okay ima throw them in the trash and I grab a plastic bag and she says "no no" and starts picking them up but I have to be after her because she will only pick up a few and say she's tired lol. Also when she doesn't listen to me I count to 3 she usually listens it works I always get to number 2 . I don't give her times out. Being a mother is pretty hard. I'm 22 years old and its all new to me too. And I'm a single mom as well. I feel like a failure and like a bad mom sometimes too but I try and she loves me, she hugs me and kisses me out of nowhere but when she gets mad she tells me she doesn't like me lol
I'm sure your a great mom:)
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 30, 2013 at 11:42 PM
This helped me a lot haha its good to know I'm not the ONLY one with this issue. I know all 2 year old's are kinda little demons but it's nice to know someone is single and young like myself with the same problem haha ill have to try the throwing away toys thing! :)

Quoting Lelly11: My 2 year old is the same way. I tell her to pick up her toys as well and she doesn't listen she says I don't want too. I try being strict with her so she can listen I tell her if she doesn't pick up her toys ima throw them in the trash. I have thrown a few of her toys away right in front of her I told her that's for not picking up her toys so now when she doesn't listen I tell her okay ima throw them in the trash and I grab a plastic bag and she says "no no" and starts picking them up but I have to be after her because she will only pick up a few and say she's tired lol. Also when she doesn't listen to me I count to 3 she usually listens it works I always get to number 2 . I don't give her times out. Being a mother is pretty hard. I'm 22 years old and its all new to me too. And I'm a single mom as well. I feel like a failure and like a bad mom sometimes too but I try and she loves me, she hugs me and kisses me out of nowhere but when she gets mad she tells me she doesn't like me lol

I'm sure your a great mom:)

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Dec. 30, 2013 at 11:46 PM

she is two. It is a phase.  you are mommy, you are the gentle one. you are not a failure you are just learning. we all went through it and the terrible two can be horrible but she will get past it.

imultracool
by on Dec. 30, 2013 at 11:48 PM
She's 2! She behaves for him cause she's not around him as much and dads are more intimidating than moms. Don't ask me why.
KrissyKC
by on Dec. 30, 2013 at 11:53 PM
1 mom liked this
One... you are her safe place to let her stress out.

Two...if she is big enough to be disrespectful, she is big enough for consequences....consistant ones.

Three...less is more with young ones. Dont spoil her or overwhelm her with toys and stuff. Have an easy to follow system and routine.

Four...stay calm. Don't let her being two ruin your day and your enjoying her.
Lelly11
by Member on Dec. 31, 2013 at 12:00 AM
I'm glad it did and trust the throwing away toys will work lol.
Their in their terrible twos!
She doesn't take me serious and she giggles sometimes like when I try dressing her or doing her hair she's all hyper, I'm like baby you need to chill lol! But she makes me happy I love her even when she drives me super crazy lol. But it is hard and your always gonna question yourself. We just need to try our best. :) keep your head up :D
Actions are better than just words like when I tell her ima throw her toys away she doesn't believe me but when I grab the bag who does she listen hahah!!

Quoting Anonymous: This helped me a lot haha its good to know I'm not the ONLY one with this issue. I know all 2 year old's are kinda little demons but it's nice to know someone is single and young like myself with the same problem haha ill have to try the throwing away toys thing! :)



Quoting Lelly11: My 2 year old is the same way. I tell her to pick up her toys as well and she doesn't listen she says I don't want too. I try being strict with her so she can listen I tell her if she doesn't pick up her toys ima throw them in the trash. I have thrown a few of her toys away right in front of her I told her that's for not picking up her toys so now when she doesn't listen I tell her okay ima throw them in the trash and I grab a plastic bag and she says "no no" and starts picking them up but I have to be after her because she will only pick up a few and say she's tired lol. Also when she doesn't listen to me I count to 3 she usually listens it works I always get to number 2 . I don't give her times out. Being a mother is pretty hard. I'm 22 years old and its all new to me too. And I'm a single mom as well. I feel like a failure and like a bad mom sometimes too but I try and she loves me, she hugs me and kisses me out of nowhere but when she gets mad she tells me she doesn't like me lol


I'm sure your a great mom:)


GaleJ
by Ruby Member on Dec. 31, 2013 at 12:06 AM
This is normal behavior for a two-year-old and you should know this and understand. Please do some research on what to expect from your child and perhaps take a parenting class.

This stage is part of the separation process that your daughter is going through on her way to growing up. There isn't any need to spank and as long as you gently and lovingly offer guidance to explain how and why she should behave differently she will learn.
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