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Does your child act this way??

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 16 Replies

My DD was HORRIBLE yesterday. Ever since I had a baby she has been acting crazy. We have been working with her to be better and understand its unacceptable to act this way. However yesterday she was basically a nightmare!!! My son is VERY colicky and he was screaming and crying while i was trying to run errands. I was trying my best to calm him but she was taking full advantage of the situation. Talking down to me like she did not have to listen (this is NOT like her). I was just in awe of the way she was acting. When we got home I told her it was unacceptable for her to behave this way and she was going to have a long time out. She screamed "no im not!!" and tried to run away so I grabbed her by her jacket to catch her and she fell back on the floor. It was completely an accident, I was just trying to catch her. But instead she starts screaming "you threw me down!!" Which definitely is not what happened. She then yelled at me and told me I was a bad mom which was extremely hurtful. So after serving her timeout I asked her if she understood why she was in time out. She said because your a bad mom and threw me down. I couldnt believe she said that!! She just kept saying it. I explained to her WHY she was really in time out but she didnt seem to care. Thats all she seemed to take away from the entire incident was poor me basically. 

I have no idea what went wrong or WHY in the world she was acting this way. She has never been THAT bad before. I know its an adjustment with the baby but I thought it would be easier since she is older (5 years old). But instead she is acting out soo badly and being so direspectful. And she doesnt seem to be learning from her time outs??

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 8, 2014 at 9:40 AM
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Replies (1-10):
ewild
by Bronze Member on Jan. 8, 2014 at 9:46 AM

Sounds like she maybe jelouse of the new baby try spending 1 on 1 time with her when she is behaving correctly

Jinx-Troublex3
by Gold Member on Jan. 8, 2014 at 9:47 AM
Maybe instead.of.time outs, she needs time in with Mom. Set one on one time and do things with DD. I am sure it is a huge adjustmemt for her after being the one and only so long.
AmiJanell
by Ruby Member on Jan. 8, 2014 at 9:48 AM

My son is 5 as well...

With his time out's he's not allowed to leave until he apologizes for what he did (he knows what he did, because when we start a time out we say "you are in time out because _______" )  and then he has time to think about it... he has to give a genuine apology for his behavior and we usually talk about what should happen the NEXT time.  So if it were me... I would have made her sit in timeout until she thought about all of her actions that lead up to her time out... about why she ended up falling down when she  claimed you threw her. 

Sometimes time outs don't seem to help if continues with his behavior... then he looses privileges. 

Jamie1972
by Ruby Member on Jan. 8, 2014 at 9:53 AM

Remember you are not the only one adjusting to a new and Colicky baby. She is too. Plus after years of being the only child now she is made to share her parents. Carve out some one on one time with her and your Dh should do the same. 

drowningmama
by on Jan. 8, 2014 at 9:55 AM
Jelous of the baby and not being used to share your time between the two of them
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 8, 2014 at 9:55 AM

We do spend one on one time with her but it doesnt seem to make her happy. I know she probably wants ALL of my time but thats not possible.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 8, 2014 at 9:55 AM

a 5 yr old doesn't know how to get their aggressions out (being around a colicky baby is enough to make anyone upset), and on top of it is having to share your attention.  An infant requires far more attention than a 5yr old and she will definitely notice.

Cmgmqmmom
by on Jan. 8, 2014 at 9:56 AM
It sounds like she'd benefit from more attention and not punishment. Don't get me wrong, her behavior is not acceptable and I can see why she deserved a time out, but in this case, she could probably stand a gentler hand.
I just went through this with my four year old son. Once I carved out more time for him and made sure he didn't feel neglected, his behavior totally turned around.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jan. 8, 2014 at 9:59 AM


Quoting Cmgmqmmom: It sounds like she'd benefit from more attention and not punishment. Don't get me wrong, her behavior is not acceptable and I can see why she deserved a time out, but in this case, she could probably stand a gentler hand.
I just went through this with my four year old son. Once I carved out more time for him and made sure he didn't feel neglected, his behavior totally turned around.

Trust me im giving her as much time as I can. My husband is not here right now so that is making matters worse. Im giving her all of my extra time which means there is no time left for me to even clean most days or do anything else for that matter.

Cmgmqmmom
by on Jan. 8, 2014 at 10:03 AM
Have you tried to get her involved with the baby? That also helped on our end. We told our kids "this is *our* baby and we need everyone to take care of her." Giving the kids some ownership made them more inclined to not look at her as an inconvenience.

Quoting Anonymous:


Quoting Cmgmqmmom: It sounds like she'd benefit from more attention and not punishment. Don't get me wrong, her behavior is not acceptable and I can see why she deserved a time out, but in this case, she could probably stand a gentler hand.

I just went through this with my four year old son. Once I carved out more time for him and made sure he didn't feel neglected, his behavior totally turned around.

Trust me im giving her as much time as I can. My husband is not here right now so that is making matters worse. Im giving her all of my extra time which means there is no time left for me to even clean most days or do anything else for that matter.

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