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custody related disagreement. opinions please

Posted by on Jan. 16, 2014 at 8:33 AM
  • 26 Replies
My son is 6. He lives with me 86% of the year... every weekday and every other weekend.. he goes to his dads friday night at 5p until sunday at 5p.. his dad and I split when he was 1 years old..
we typically get along great.
I have been in a relationship with my df now for 4 years... he recently started dating 3 months ago...

Would you be comfortable with his gf of 3 months spending the night with with your 6 year old child that she has met 4 times.. before u got to know her? It makes me uneasy to have her spend the night without me knowing who she is.. just a simple conversation would help... I've given that courtesy to my ex.. he met my SO before he spent the night or was around my son much...
I offered to take them to dinner (my SO and me, and them)... he got pissed and said he will do whatever the fuck he wants...

Honest opinions? Should I let it go and trust him.. or be persistent in wanting to meet her?
by on Jan. 16, 2014 at 8:33 AM
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Replies (1-10):
LilliesValley
by on Jan. 16, 2014 at 8:36 AM
He can do whatever he wants but I would also want to know who my kid is around as well. Since you normally get along okay why not invite them over or out to dinner a few times so you get to know her? That's really the best you can do if there's nothing specifically in your order that says otherwise.
nana776
by on Jan. 16, 2014 at 8:38 AM
Depends on how much you trust his ability to put ds's welfare first. Does he show good judgement in his choice of friends? If so, trust his judgement and back off.
SAHMJC
by Emerald Member on Jan. 16, 2014 at 8:39 AM
If there is nothing in the court order there really isn't anything you can do to stop him. You reached out but he declined.
MMIC
by on Jan. 16, 2014 at 8:39 AM
You can't control others lives. do your own research on her and bring it back to court if you must but other than that, nothing you can do.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Jan. 16, 2014 at 8:39 AM

Trust that he knows what he's doing.  I think women in your situation want to be controlling and make things their business that is none of their business.  I agree with him, it's really none of your business.

onaflowers
by on Jan. 16, 2014 at 8:39 AM
You know him best, but he waited 5 yrars to date. He must feel like she is someone special.
LoriLou75
by Ruby Member on Jan. 16, 2014 at 8:40 AM
If you trust him to keep your child safe and put her best interests first it shouldn't matter.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 16, 2014 at 8:40 AM
I would be weary but she won't be there alone with you son. If she is there when you drop him off just try to strike up a conversation with her. First impressions are not always the best but you can normally get an idea about what someone e is like after meeting them even for a few min.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jan. 16, 2014 at 8:41 AM

Do you trust him? Because if you do, you know he would never have anyone around his child who could hurt him.  Did he tll you anything about her? Kids no kids etc etc-what does she do for a living?

mjgm1966
by on Jan. 16, 2014 at 8:42 AM

 You typically get along great.  And you haven't had any issues with him getting your son on the weekends.  I'd trust his judgement until you have reason not to.  I can see where he might be a little offended at you.  Give him the benefit of the doubt.  And her too.....

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