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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

having children is like a life prison sentence!!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 163 Replies
4 moms liked this
Like explained on "the back up plan" it's horrible, horrible, horrible, and then something amazing happens.

Last night after doing dishes and realizing that a very large knife was in fact not at the bottom of the sink. I sent my husband on a mission to tear apart the kids bedroom to see if he could find it. What he did find was sooooooooooo much worse than any large kitchen knife imaginable.

Turn back now, if you have a weak stomach.


No, seriously, even the mom with a stomach of steel will likely gag in her mouth.

Ok, for those whose curiosity has killed them and made them stay. Don't say I didn't warn you.

What my husband found under my 4 year old sons bed, was disturbing and disgusting. It was a serious, wtf did I do in my life or past life that was so bad, kind of a moment.

My husband found a popcorn bag. The popcorn bag is not what is disgusting. I know, you said, "well, wtf is so disgusting and disturbing about a popcorn bag?"

It was what was in the bag that was disturbing and disgusting.

Turn back now. Last warning! Seriously, turn BACK!

One of my boys, either my 6 year old or 4 year old shit, yes shit, defacated, pooped, took a dump, went #2, whatever you want to call it. They shit into this popcorn bag and then hid it under a bed.

Seriously? Yes, dead serious. It was disgusting. It was disturbing. It was so many things that I can't even describe. It was less than amazing though.

I was in disbelief when my husband came down the stairs with said bag and asked which child was so disgustingly foul that they couldn't shit in one of the three, yes three, bathrooms we have in this house.

There was a lot of finger pointing and off the wall nonsense. But no actual guilty party was named. 6 year old said the 4 year old did it, 4 year old said the 6 year old did it. Hell they even tried to blame their 1 year old sister.

This shit (pun intended) was not in the parenthood brochure, that's for damn sure! Wtf is wrong with my disgustingly sick caveman children? The hell if I know! Why in the bloody hell would they do this? Again, I don't know. What would ever possess anybody to do this is beyond me.

My mommy instincts are telling me it was my 6 year old. Two reasons, first being he's not disgusted by poop, in fact he is disgustingly fascinated by the shit (again, intended pun). Secondly, my 4 year old freaks out if he has to go to the bathroom and he always invades my bathroom if theirs is occupied.

Oh and for those wondering, no, I have yet to find my rather large kitchen knife. However, there was a small steak knife under my 6 year olds bed.

Remember, these are the good years *sarcastic eye roll* good years my god damn ass! I want to hang them from the ceiling fans by their fuckin toes. Obviously I won't. But it sure sounds appealing at this point.
Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 27, 2014 at 11:05 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 27, 2014 at 11:22 AM
Bump
redneckmama4
by Loree on Jan. 27, 2014 at 11:23 AM
Funky!
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 27, 2014 at 11:26 AM
Funky or funny?

Quoting redneckmama4: Funky!
fullxbusymom
by Ruby Member on Jan. 27, 2014 at 11:29 AM
1 mom liked this

Eh I don't find that as horrible as you.  Kids do disgusting things it is part of being a kid I guess.  Nothing grosses me out anymore after raising 7 kids.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 27, 2014 at 11:30 AM

Thye might both have been in on it-one doing it and the othe r   one egging them on.

Boys are gross creatures.  I suggest a stint of animal poop pick up-=borrow one if necessary.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 27, 2014 at 11:31 AM

Kids are just friggen disgusting. Mine spent a good part of ages 4 and 5 wiping boogers on everything. Walls, dressers, sheets, under desks and tables - basically whatever was close. He had a whole damn mural on the bed and nightstand!! In fact, here we are 5 or 6 years later, and because DH is too lazy to clean it up, and I refuse, there are still dried smeared boogers on the underside of DH's computer desk!!  WTF kid?

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 27, 2014 at 11:31 AM
10 moms liked this

Your 1, 4, and 6 year olds are left unattended long enough to not only get NUMEROUS kitchen knives but to also play with and hide them. They're also defecating in strange items and hiding it, NONE of this is normal. Have you considered therapy and parenting classes? I would send all of the kids away for a weekend and clean your home from top to bottom, leaving no stone unturned. You NEED to find every dangerous thing they're hiding and then baby proof and supervise them better so that this doesn't happen again. Someone is going to get hurt or be killed.

redneckmama4
by Loree on Jan. 27, 2014 at 11:31 AM
1 mom liked this
Funky as in funky.



Quoting Anonymous: Funky or funny?



Quoting redneckmama4: Funky!
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 27, 2014 at 11:33 AM
I used to say the same thing. But that was effin gross!

Quoting fullxbusymom:

Eh I don't find that as horrible as you.  Kids do disgusting things it is part of being a kid I guess.  Nothing grosses me out anymore after raising 7 kids.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 27, 2014 at 11:34 AM
4 moms liked this

Sounds like the kids need better supervision.

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