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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

My husband told me he wishes I'd lose weight

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

I was skinny when we met- 5'4'' and 115 lbs. I didn't gain that much weight in pregnancy, probably like 30 pounds. It was when I started being a SAHM and the kids were older that I started gaining weight. Right now, my boys are 6 and 4 and I homeschool. I eat what they eat, so obviously not great. Right now I weigh 180. 

My husband started working out on his lunch hour and has dropped 20 pounds and is getting fit and muscular. It had been one of my New Years Resolutions to lose weight and we were talking about resolutions. He asked if I was still sticking to the weight loss one and I said I hadn't been. He said he wishes I would take it more seriously. 

I just said "oh" and left the room and cried. I feel like shit and I wish he hadn't said that to me. 

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 28, 2014 at 7:06 PM
Replies (31-40):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 8 on Jan. 28, 2014 at 7:27 PM
1 mom liked this
Fruits, vegetables, quinoa, lean meat and fish, whole grain, nuts ...

Quoting Anonymous:

I don't feed them "crap", just stuff that kids eat. I won't make them eat like rabbits just because I have a weight issue. 

Quoting Miller0305: Why do you feed your kids crap? Make healthy foods for all of you.


newbieann
by Bronze Member on Jan. 28, 2014 at 7:29 PM
1 mom liked this
He sAid it in a nice way. Maybe you two can do it together. I don't see anything wrong with your husband still wanting to be attracted to you. My husband has gained up to 50 pounds at a point, I asked him to lose weight. And our sex life got even better after that
Anonymous
by Anonymous 9 on Jan. 28, 2014 at 7:29 PM
I'd use it as motivation.
sdsstargazer
by Gold Member on Jan. 28, 2014 at 7:29 PM
Wow...I'm not sure how that's pathetic to be grieving for your spouse two weeks after his death. I guess two weeks later she's supposed to be over it already? It's not like it was a terminal illness and she had time to say goodbye, she came home to find her dead husband.

I'm glad you are a strong person and would be able to accept your SO's death so quickly. My friend unfortunately cannot. It is going to take her a long time to accept that he is gone.

Quoting Caera:

She actually sounds pretty pathetic. Time to pull herself together and move on. Like her husband would want her to.

Quoting sdsstargazer: Let me give you a different perspective to view it from.



Recently a very good friend just lost her spouse. We thought he was healthy enough, he ate regular everyday foods, didn't really exercise except for the everyday walking around for work type things. He wasn't excessively obese, but he had put on weight.



Two weeks ago, my friend came home from work and found her husband in bed dead. He died from a heart attack. Apparently he had high blood pressure and high cholesterol.



This man was my friend's world. Her life is shattered, her kids are without a father now. She has decided to quit working, she is leaving our city and moving back to her parents' hometown. She literally cannot function.



She is now constantly telling us, love your spouse, get your health checked, eat right, exercise. Your husband may not have said this to be hurtful, but because he didn't know any other way to say he couldn't live without you.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jan. 28, 2014 at 7:29 PM
2 moms liked this

Seriously? He didn't say "I'm not attracted to you, fatass", he said he wished she'd take her goal to lose weight more seriously. SHE was the one who brought up the goal of losing weight. 

It sounds like her husband is making an effort to get healthier. It's not a shock that he wishes his obese wife join him in that. If I was unhealthy in ANY way, including obesity, I'd want my husband to gently discuss it with me. 

Quoting piesmama09:

I know, how about you lose a HUGE chunk of dead weight by serving him with divorce papers! Because he's an ASSHOLE! And to all of these people saying he's somehow right? Bitches PLEASE, you would REALLY let a man talk to you like that? Because my DH wouldn't dare say shit like that to me.


newbieann
by Bronze Member on Jan. 28, 2014 at 7:31 PM
Quoting piesmama09:

I know, how about you lose a HUGE chunk of dead weight by serving him with divorce papers! Because he's an ASSHOLE! And to all of these people saying he's somehow right? Bitches PLEASE, you would REALLY let a man talk to you like that? Because my DH wouldn't dare say shit like that to me.



He has a right to still want to be attracted to his wife. And he was not an ass about it.
If you gained 70 pounds and your husband want attracted to you, would you honestly be ok with
That?
abecee
by on Jan. 28, 2014 at 7:31 PM

Could you exercise together?

3xangel
by *Angelicious* on Jan. 28, 2014 at 7:32 PM
Agreed! By OP's own admission he didn't call her names or degrade her, he just asked if she was still sticking to her resolution. The man wasn't disrespectful or mean, yet there are comments like the one below and others talking about they'd punch him, etc. SMH.

Quoting LizzieAnnesMom: See this is why men are never honest about how they feel or never want to tell their wives how they feel. As soon as one does then people start screaming divorce. Now wonder the divorce rate is so high, divorcing over petty shit.



Quoting piesmama09:

I know, how about you lose a HUGE chunk of dead weight by serving him with divorce papers! Because he's an ASSHOLE! And to all of these people saying he's somehow right? Bitches PLEASE, you would REALLY let a man talk to you like that? Because my DH wouldn't dare say shit like that to me.

piesmama09
by on Jan. 28, 2014 at 7:33 PM

 There is NO excuse for a man to intentionally hurt his wife's feelings like that. None. It speaks VOLUMES about his character.

Quoting LizzieAnnesMom: See this is why men are never honest about how they feel or never want to tell their wives how they feel. As soon as one does then people start screaming divorce. Now wonder the divorce rate is so high, divorcing over petty shit.

Quoting piesmama09:

I know, how about you lose a HUGE chunk of dead weight by serving him with divorce papers! Because he's an ASSHOLE! And to all of these people saying he's somehow right? Bitches PLEASE, you would REALLY let a man talk to you like that? Because my DH wouldn't dare say shit like that to me.

 

newbieann
by Bronze Member on Jan. 28, 2014 at 7:34 PM

Sorry fOr your friends lose. That person who called your friend pathetic is heartless.

Quoting sdsstargazer: Wow...I'm not sure how that's pathetic to be grieving for your spouse two weeks after his death. I guess two weeks later she's supposed to be over it already? It's not like it was a terminal illness and she had time to say goodbye, she came home to find her dead husband.

I'm glad you are a strong person and would be able to accept your SO's death so quickly. My friend unfortunately cannot. It is going to take her a long time to accept that he is gone.

Quoting Caera:

She actually sounds pretty pathetic. Time to pull herself together and move on. Like her husband would want her to.

Quoting sdsstargazer: Let me give you a different perspective to view it from.

Recently a very good friend just lost her spouse. We thought he was healthy enough, he ate regular everyday foods, didn't really exercise except for the everyday walking around for work type things. He wasn't excessively obese, but he had put on weight.

Two weeks ago, my friend came home from work and found her husband in bed dead. He died from a heart attack. Apparently he had high blood pressure and high cholesterol.

This man was my friend's world. Her life is shattered, her kids are without a father now. She has decided to quit working, she is leaving our city and moving back to her parents' hometown. She literally cannot function.

She is now constantly telling us, love your spouse, get your health checked, eat right, exercise. Your husband may not have said this to be hurtful, but because he didn't know any other way to say he couldn't live without you.

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