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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

my ex fil kept me in his will and now ex and family are pissed.

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

 id shrugged off how my  ex fil said he was keeping me in his will  despite  his son walking out on me,  that  he loved me and my girls  that my girls (from my 1st marriage) were the closest thing to grandkids he had.   

 silly me  i just thought whatever with the will  thing, thats just talk people say. well it wasnt talk.  and he  passed away earlier this month.

 he and his daughter  were not that close, their mom bashed alot about their dad, snide comments all the time even years later after they had divorced, pretty much poisoning his sister  against  their dad, ex also said before he felt like he had to choose between his mom and dad.  most the time her and her dad were not speaking even, really was not things he said or did at all, she would blow him off alot, leave him hanging yet if there was money  just accept it and go. at times he was so frustrated he spoke of cutting her out of his will because she  just didnt put much of any effort into a relationship with him despite his trying so hard. id told him not to be hastey that it was a big move to do that. well aparently last few years when he was revising  his will even after me and his son divorced, he finnaly did  cut out his daughter. 

aparently  according to ex, his mom and his sister, his sister reconciled with him like 2 weeks before he died seeing and talking with him at christmas. and then   he got really sick and they didnt know and he suddenly died. he had heart failure and copd.... ex said he had moved in with him just 2 weeks before he died because he and his 2nd wife divorced.  he somehow  claimed not to see how sick his dad really had gotten.

 also his sister was in jail for a dui when their dad died. 

 now that its come about  that, his dad left me a benificiary as well as my ex, of his  money in the bank, the bank divided it, ex got his already,  well now pressure is on ex is asking for  what his dad left to me. his ssiter is asking for it too, saying it was supposed to be left things only to him and to her but he didnt get a chance to change his will, that i shouldnt be on his will,  that her car is totaled and needs money for legal fees.  its a cluster fuck.  my ex said he doesnt know yet if his dad also added me as a benificary on his life insurance with him as well,  so if thats so then it would be  split too.  but  his dad also left just my ex, his house, and 2  facny cars  new correvette and mustang i think they are.   plus the half of  bank accoutns, but yes ex may also be the only one on his dads life insurance!  only me and my ex were in his dads will!!!!  

  i hate people thinking badly of me, ive never crossed or wronged  their family  nor did i ever treat  my ex badly! hell i was a door matt and  blind  to his cheating ect.  i am accpeting  what he left me and respecting it was his wishes for me to have something from him.   but god this is going to be a nightmare from my ex and his sister and their mom. i dont know what to do or how to handle it, sure  they will hate and never want to speak to me again ever.

 what do i do?

 total with his dads estate i basically just got 1/3 and its only in liquid money.  i partly dont see why  my ex cant  give his sister  the life insurance or  even one of the cars he got which hes  trying to trade in  to get himself an suv . why is it only what his dad left me thats to be  torn apart?

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 30, 2014 at 9:12 AM
Replies (71-79):
FlutterbyMom3
by on Jan. 30, 2014 at 1:04 PM
He left it for you because he wanted you to have it. Legally it's yours. Forget the rest of them. Their opinions don't matter and really, that's all they have, opinions.
AnastasiaKorsh
by on Jan. 30, 2014 at 1:07 PM
if he left it to you, its yours. invest it in your kids futures.
mamalama898
by Bronze Member on Jan. 30, 2014 at 1:17 PM

Don't feel bad or worry about it. Your FIL wanted you to have that.

DragonInfinity
by Platinum Member on Jan. 30, 2014 at 1:18 PM

 Why would you even be in contact with your ex-MIL and SIL still? if they call, ignore it. problem solved. If ex-FIL wanted them to have anything, he would have made arrangements accordingly.

It is a gift from yor ex-FIL to you. No one elses!

seksen
by Gold Member on Jan. 30, 2014 at 1:25 PM
You keep it for you and your babies. It was HIS choice.. Not anyone else's. Please honor his wishes.
TexanMomOf6
by Gold Member on Jan. 30, 2014 at 3:41 PM
That sounds great! It is plenty of money to make a good difference in your family. Don't tell the neighbors. They'll need to borrow some!!! Lol.

Quoting Anonymous:

oh god it would be immediatly deposited in my bank and  what  was left after paying off debt would  then be transfered into savings. its alot of money to me , some people dont see 47k  as alot but i  do.  im a saver, have always had  an insecurity to do with money  so im  kinda a cheapskate but i dont go extreame, i coupon but not  to the extreame, hell i cant remember the last time i even got myself clothes... i think it might have been even before that ex,  other times id had the  money to treat myself but id treat others instaead, like  instead of betting myself and kids new clothes, id just do alot more  of the kids new stuff.   as for buying a home, well id say im going to put that off at least another 5 years. just kinda leave   whatever left to grow and grow.

Quoting TexanMomOf6: K. Don't cash the check yet. Cash in hand is very easy to spend frivolously. Get some financial advise first. Money is a tool. Use it wisely. This opportunity doesn't come around often.





Quoting Anonymous:

oh  the only mention of his sister to me was just saying his dad cut her out of the will and he was laughing... he was pushing hinting and asking about me collecting the money and just giving most or all of it to him!, but his sister messaged me  all the other stuff on facebook.  ex didnt say a peep about sharing  some of his with her or if i was to give him any of mine that he would share it with her or anything. but  ex did say his family was mad and didnt want him to even tell me about that i was left money but said he really had to because if i didnt claim it the state would take it so it didnt matter because they would never see it  because of that. so yeah i have to collect it and pretty much  then its him and her trying to get it from me after i cash the check.

 i go to the bank today to pick that up, dreading it big time, i mean its enough  that me and my dh can get out of our crushing debt, that now its not so stressful that dh hours are slashed at work starting next week,  i can buy food for next week, hell  can keep my phone turned on  too now.  but also that  money can  just then be put insavings to sit and grow to someday buy a house. its enough to buy a small house or put a down payment on a big one around here. 

Quoting TexanMomOf6: Don't give them anything. The vultures always come swooping in when there is a death in the family. They all scream Mine Mine Mine!!! Nope. His Will says what he wanted. Take it. Keep it. Invest it somehow. School or property or whatever. It's yours. If the son is so worried about his sister HE can give her part of HIS money.



billiejo79
by Silver Member on Jan. 30, 2014 at 3:47 PM

I wouldn't worry about your exs family wants. His dad wanted you and your girls to have that. I agree with contacting a CPA to find out what taxes you'll have to pay before you spend anything.

FoxFire363
by Ruby Member on Jan. 30, 2014 at 3:52 PM
Keep what he left you. He wanted you to have it.
xoch86
by Gold Member on Jan. 30, 2014 at 3:53 PM

Honey, u take that money and DONT tell them when u are picking it up. Change ur number, and close ur Facebook for some time. They are ALL going to be after u for that money and u don't need that in ur life. You do not owe ur ex a penny of it so he can stop his BS, unless u guys have kids together, cut him off now cause he's gonna make u  feel like u owe it to him, and u DONT. 

Quoting Anonymous:

oh  the only mention of his sister to me was just saying his dad cut her out of the will and he was laughing... he was pushing hinting and asking about me collecting the money and just giving most or all of it to him!, but his sister messaged me  all the other stuff on facebook.  ex didnt say a peep about sharing  some of his with her or if i was to give him any of mine that he would share it with her or anything. but  ex did say his family was mad and didnt want him to even tell me about that i was left money but said he really had to because if i didnt claim it the state would take it so it didnt matter because they would never see it  because of that. so yeah i have to collect it and pretty much  then its him and her trying to get it from me after i cash the check.

 i go to the bank today to pick that up, dreading it big time, i mean its enough  that me and my dh can get out of our crushing debt, that now its not so stressful that dh hours are slashed at work starting next week,  i can buy food for next week, hell  can keep my phone turned on  too now.  but also that  money can  just then be put insavings to sit and grow to someday buy a house. its enough to buy a small house or put a down payment on a big one around here. 

Quoting TexanMomOf6: Don't give them anything. The vultures always come swooping in when there is a death in the family. They all scream Mine Mine Mine!!! Nope. His Will says what he wanted. Take it. Keep it. Invest it somehow. School or property or whatever. It's yours. If the son is so worried about his sister HE can give her part of HIS money.



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