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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I am not letting my DD donate a kidney to her half sister

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 659 Replies
4 moms liked this
I have primary custody as well as sole medical, educational and religious decision making power for my ten year old DD. My ex has a DD with his girlfriend who is now 4 and needs a kidney transplant. Without my knowledge or consent, he took DD to be tested to see if she is a match. That alone violated the court order as he is only allowed to seek emergency medical services for her. As it happens she is a match. Last week, when my ex dropped her off after his visit, he told me he had her tested and she is and he thinks she should get to make that choice herself. Of course this was only after telling her she is a match and making her feel she has to. I talked to her about it and after realizing that he and his girlfriend have put it in her head that she doesn't have a choice there is no way I will even consider letting her do it. She said she was scared but felt like she had no choice. I told her that her half sister can get on a list and get one from someone who has already passed away and doesn't need their kidnies. I also explained that because she is so young there is a real risk that one kidney is not going to last her the rest of her life. Then i put it on myself and told her she has no reason to feel guilty because its not her choice anyway, its mine and I am saying no. She understands at least as well as she can and I told my ex that if he ever brings up donating again or in any way tries to make her feel guilty I will take him to court for violating the court order by having her tested. He said that he can't believe I am being "like this" and as her sister DD should donate. I have a feeling court will be in the near future. Seriously though, what kind of person puts pressure on one child to donate to another?
Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 2, 2014 at 12:56 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Feb. 2, 2014 at 12:57 PM
1 mom liked this

BUMP!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Feb. 2, 2014 at 12:58 PM
46 moms liked this
I would take her to a therapist to make her feel better... she could feel responsible for her sisters death if she does not get a kdney in time
two4one
by Platinum Member on Feb. 2, 2014 at 12:58 PM
35 moms liked this

NO way, she is too young to donate. What a horrible thing to put on a young child. WHile I feel for your ex, and the emotions he is going through, he shouldn't try to force such a life altering decision on a child.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Feb. 2, 2014 at 12:58 PM
8 moms liked this
I would be furious and already have him on the court docket. That's insane. I wouldn't let my children do this either at such a young age.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Feb. 2, 2014 at 12:59 PM
1 mom liked this
How desperate does she need the transplant? Will she be in immediate danger if she doesn't get is ASAP? Is it real urgent?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Feb. 2, 2014 at 12:59 PM
Saving my spot!
OwlNuggets
by HAIL NUGGY! on Feb. 2, 2014 at 12:59 PM
15 moms liked this

That's awful, protect your daughter. :(

she's just a little girl, she shouldn't be forced into something she doesn't want to do.

YOU need to call the courts right now and have your daughter give someone a statement.



AVE SATANAS!
Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Feb. 2, 2014 at 1:00 PM
29 moms liked this
I see your side & their desperation. I would not know what to do except pray to god my decision was based on being educated & not spite.
CountryStrong84
by Gold Member on Feb. 2, 2014 at 1:00 PM
1 mom liked this
That's messed up.
Rachael-Dawn
by Gold Member on Feb. 2, 2014 at 1:00 PM
3 moms liked this
Wow. This is such a sad situation.
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