10 Ways to Ensure Your Kid Doesn’t Get Invited to Another Playdate
by Jill Smokler
One of the benefits to having older children is that you no longer have to be an active participant in playdates. Lily had a friend over for 48 hours last weekend, and the only time I saw them was at meal time and to say goodnight. It was glorious. They spent the whole time playing Barbies, reading, and putting on dance shows in Lily's room. Does it get any better than that?
Evan, my 6-year-old, on the other hand, is still at the age where he needs some direction and supervision during playdates. He's also at the age where his playmates need some reminding of what is proper playdate behavior and what is not. This should help ...
1. Do not walk into a clean and organized playroom and dump out every bin of toys. Unless it's a fun game and you plan on picking every last toy up and returning it to its proper home.
2. Do not go into the pantry and grab yourself a snack without asking. That was my box of Golden Grahams, kid.
3. Do not tell me that you are bored. I'm not here to entertain you. I could use some help folding this laundry, however.
4. Don't do disgusting things in front of me. I know you do them. I don't need to see them.
5. Do not track mud or snow into the house. Leave your shoes by the door. Were you raised in a barn?
6. Do not make a mess in my bathroom. Aim in the toilet. Wipe the seat. Flush. And wash your freaking hands! Well.
7. Do not ask me to watch you do 30 cartwheels or vocal performances or solo dance routines. When you do them with my kid, I'm mildly entertained. When you're doing them alone, I'm just waiting for you to finish. Or trip.
8. Do not pick on or make fun of your playdate's -- my child's -- siblings. Are you stupid?
9. Do not ask to watch TV or play video games the whole time. You are there to entertain my child; the TV can entertain him after you leave.
10. Do not ask to sleep over. I'm pretty sure we've had enough of each other.
What playdate rules would you add to this list?