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Raising my special needs granddaughter

Posted by on Feb. 5, 2014 at 4:05 PM
  • 9 Replies

My husband and I are raising our 2 granddaughters; the oldest of which is special needs. First she was diagnosed with ADHD, then autism spectrum, bi-polar, now its mood disorders. The latter of which was diagnosed after she spent two weeks in a behavioral hospital, which to me did more harm than good. They have prescribed her with 50 mg of Zoloft daily. I cannot see any difference in before she was taking it and now...none whatsever. She is a normal functioning child three weeks out of the month. But there's one week that she just falls apart. It starts with her complaining of an earache and goes downhill from there. She paces, cries, stutters, repeats herself and her questions constantly, wont eat and just wants to sleep most of the time. During this period she can't go to school because she is in such turmoil. We are in the process of finding her a new PCP and a child psychiatrist. I just think there's something else going on that is causing this. I haven't seen any of these symptoms in anything I've read about what she was diagnosed with. The child has been through so much with her mother's lifestyle and been uprooted from home to home, school to school and so many different people in and out of her life. With my daughter it's her way or the highway and she just doesn't listen to any advice we are her parents try to give her. She can't see what she is doing to these girls by not being in their life on a day to day basis, she's more interested in being with her habitual thief, low life boyfriend (she's still married too). Sometimes I just want to open a can of whoop ass on her and give her what I should have given her years ago instead of catering to her because she was the baby. I blame myself for that!  She's an adult and on her own I can't help her anymore but I can see that the girls have the very best care I can give them. I'm just looking for answers; if any of ya'll have experienced these symptoms with your child/children and any advice will be greatly appreciated. Thanks Rebecca

by on Feb. 5, 2014 at 4:05 PM
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Replies (1-9):
AJsMom81507
by Platinum Member on Feb. 5, 2014 at 4:08 PM

how old is she, and how long has she been experiencing this?

suzanneyea
by on Feb. 5, 2014 at 4:10 PM

Best of luck.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Feb. 5, 2014 at 4:13 PM

how old is she? is it possible that she was molested by someone her mother brought her around?

myshoes
by Platinum Member on Feb. 5, 2014 at 4:13 PM
2 moms liked this
If it is one week a month, I wonder if it is hormonal. (I am not usually one to blame stuff on "that time of the month").
Kellyjude1
by Gold Member on Feb. 5, 2014 at 5:04 PM
1 mom liked this

Thank God you stepped in for your 2 grand-daughters.  I think with maybe getting another doctor's opinion is a good idea.  I am so sorry and can't imagine what you are going through.  It has to be so hard with watching her go through this and not knowing what is wrong.  You seem to be doing all you possibly can.  Continue to seek help even searching the symptoms over the internet.  Try going onto forums for special needs children explaining as you have here what your grand-daughter is going through. Check to see on Cafemom  if they have a special needs group which may be helpful.  Since she has gone through so much with her mom's lifestyle and has been uprooted time and time again surely this effects a child.  Family or individual therapy may also help.  Hopefully with some time lots of love and shown stability along with working with doctors and therapist things will change. It is so sad that your daughter does not realize the 2 little blessings she has hopefully one day soon she will.

boogielu_23
by on Feb. 7, 2014 at 6:59 PM

She has already been diagnosed with mood disorders and given zoloft 50 mg which I can see no difference in before and since she's been on it. They ruled out any sort of molestation when she was hospitalized and evaluated. She is 12 and has not started her period yet. She has been going through this for a little over a year. Last month it was the 7th this month it started on the 4th. We are fixing to start working with a counselor once a week and hoping we can find some sort of explanation as to why this only happens once a month. My thought was that it was more physical than mental because any other time she functions normally and does really well in school and around other people. Just praying God gives me the strength to endure and help her in any way I can so that she can go on and be productive. Thank you all for the replies..it helps to have someone to talk to

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Feb. 7, 2014 at 7:07 PM
1 mom liked this
It sound like bipolar to me. But I'm no specialist. Good luck! If it is cyclical she can always look forward to the 3 weeks of great times.
Danesmommy1
by Grammar Enthusiast on Feb. 7, 2014 at 7:14 PM
My first thought was could it be pms? I remember when I started my period, my mom said thank God, I thought I'd have to beat it out of you. (No, she wouldn't really beat me) I guess I had really bad pms.
boogielu_23
by on Feb. 10, 2014 at 11:28 AM

Thank you all! I'm just feeling so defeated as I feel I've done everything to make things easier for her. She's been in meltdown since the 4th and yesterday it was really bad....she said some things I tried not to take personally but it still hurt and I know she didnt mean the things she was saying. She's just so hurt by the things her mother has done and is doing. I know she must feel abandoned by the one person she loves the most. In talking to my daughter yesterday her job at McDonald's is more important than being with her girls. I'm not knocking McDonald's but I can guarantee you if my child called begging me to come home that job would be meaningless to me. All I can really do is continue to pray that God will heal her and that he won't let her suffer thru more than she can handle. I may give out but I'll never give up.grandma

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