Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

WWYD? Am i overreacting in this?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 13 Replies

DH has a friend (we joke about it being a bromance), he is a good guy and everything, he comes over almost every week. That's not the problem. The problem is like today. He was suppose to come over around 3-4pm after work (DH's day off today). Called around 2pm and said he wouldn't be able to come over at 5:30pm, okay. Texts DH at 7pm and says he won't be able to come over.

This happens EVERY SINGLE WEEK, we happened to not have plans tonight but i feel like it's so rude him doing this. I've tried talking to DH about it and he agrees with me (at least says he does) but doesn't really say anything to his friend about it.

Today was a particularly bad day and i'm just so tired of people being inconsiderate, i told DH just to tell him not to come over ever again (he didn't) and i know that was a overreaction.

WWYD? The excuse his friend primarily makes is, his family, like today his little brother (who's 13) had dentention and then he cooked dinner for his family. He works for his stepdad so he also uses work/stepdad as an excuse. I'm just fed up with it.

Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 5, 2014 at 11:00 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Feb. 5, 2014 at 11:21 PM

I'm confused. Does he actually come over every week or say he will come over and then never does?

I would just plan like he's NOT coming. If he shows up, good, if not, oh well.

Quoting Anonymous:

DH has a friend (we joke about it being a bromance), he is a good guy and everything, he comes over almost every week. That's not the problem. The problem is like today. He was suppose to come over around 3-4pm after work (DH's day off today). Called around 2pm and said he wouldn't be able to come over at 5:30pm, okay. Texts DH at 7pm and says he won't be able to come over.

This happens EVERY SINGLE WEEK, we happened to not have plans tonight but i feel like it's so rude him doing this. I've tried talking to DH about it and he agrees with me (at least says he does) but doesn't really say anything to his friend about it.

Today was a particularly bad day and i'm just so tired of people being inconsiderate, i told DH just to tell him not to come over ever again (he didn't) and i know that was a overreaction.

WWYD? The excuse his friend primarily makes is, his family, like today his little brother (who's 13) had dentention and then he cooked dinner for his family. He works for his stepdad so he also uses work/stepdad as an excuse. I'm just fed up with it.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Feb. 5, 2014 at 11:27 PM

Sorry, I know it's a little unclear, sometimes he actually comes over, sometimes not, (about 50/50) but he is never on time or arrives 3 or 4 hours late. If i WANT to plan something, DH says (friend) is coming over that day, if i try to make plans anyway, DH complains the next week that he didn't get to see his friend last week.

Quoting Anonymous:

I'm confused. Does he actually come over every week or say he will come over and then never does?

I would just plan like he's NOT coming. If he shows up, good, if not, oh well.

Quoting Anonymous:

DH has a friend (we joke about it being a bromance), he is a good guy and everything, he comes over almost every week. That's not the problem. The problem is like today. He was suppose to come over around 3-4pm after work (DH's day off today). Called around 2pm and said he wouldn't be able to come over at 5:30pm, okay. Texts DH at 7pm and says he won't be able to come over.

This happens EVERY SINGLE WEEK, we happened to not have plans tonight but i feel like it's so rude him doing this. I've tried talking to DH about it and he agrees with me (at least says he does) but doesn't really say anything to his friend about it.

Today was a particularly bad day and i'm just so tired of people being inconsiderate, i told DH just to tell him not to come over ever again (he didn't) and i know that was a overreaction.

WWYD? The excuse his friend primarily makes is, his family, like today his little brother (who's 13) had dentention and then he cooked dinner for his family. He works for his stepdad so he also uses work/stepdad as an excuse. I'm just fed up with it.

 

 

Ilaynasmommy
by Gold Member on Feb. 5, 2014 at 11:31 PM
How many days off does he have off? If two, make one day your day for plans and the other for his friend. If hisffriend doesn't show, make it a cuddle day or family day
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Feb. 5, 2014 at 11:33 PM
1 mom liked this
How old are you all?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Feb. 5, 2014 at 11:35 PM

 I tried that too, but since we only have one car, most of the time, one of his days off has to be errand day. I've explained my frustation that i only get two days a week with him and if he is hanging with his friend on day, and errand day the other, i have no time with him.

Quoting Anonymous:

DH has a friend (we joke about it being a bromance), he is a good guy and everything, he comes over almost every week. That's not the problem. The problem is like today. He was suppose to come over around 3-4pm after work (DH's day off today). Called around 2pm and said he wouldn't be able to come over at 5:30pm, okay. Texts DH at 7pm and says he won't be able to come over.

This happens EVERY SINGLE WEEK, we happened to not have plans tonight but i feel like it's so rude him doing this. I've tried talking to DH about it and he agrees with me (at least says he does) but doesn't really say anything to his friend about it.

Today was a particularly bad day and i'm just so tired of people being inconsiderate, i told DH just to tell him not to come over ever again (he didn't) and i know that was a overreaction.

WWYD? The excuse his friend primarily makes is, his family, like today his little brother (who's 13) had dentention and then he cooked dinner for his family. He works for his stepdad so he also uses work/stepdad as an excuse. I'm just fed up with it.

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Feb. 5, 2014 at 11:36 PM

 We are all in our twenties I think his friend is 21.

Quoting Anonymous: How old are you all?

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Feb. 5, 2014 at 11:37 PM
Ok just trying to paint a picture. Carry on
MixedCooke
by Ruby Member on Feb. 6, 2014 at 2:46 AM

why are YOU mad that he couldnt come by when it seems to be an imposition anyway?  You also knew by 2pm that he wasnt going to be able to come by, so that is more than enough time for you and hubby to make other plans.  if he is a flake overall, then dont depend on him coming by if thats what you do.

linmei
by on Feb. 6, 2014 at 2:47 AM
Let your husband deal with it its his friend
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Feb. 6, 2014 at 2:54 AM

 I'm not mad he couldn't come by, i'm mad because he says he is going to and half the time doesn't show up. We didn't know until 7/8pm that he wasn't coming, he just kept pushing back the time (from 3/4pm, to after 5:30, and at 7 or 8pm finally said he wasn't coming.)

Prime example, we went on vacation for a litte over a week and his friend couldn't come over the next week (he cancelled), when i made plans, DH complained he hadn't seen friend in over 2 weeks

Quoting MixedCooke:

why are YOU mad that he couldnt come by when it seems to be an imposition anyway?  You also knew by 2pm that he wasnt going to be able to come by, so that is more than enough time for you and hubby to make other plans.  if he is a flake overall, then dont depend on him coming by if thats what you do.

 

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)