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I lied to my husband about having a miscarriage

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 336 Replies
24 moms liked this

I made it clear to him while we were dating that I would not get an abortion if I was pregnant. We got married, and had been married for 11 months, and went on vacation to Hawaii and I didn't bring my birth control. He could have used condoms. He could have pulled out. I told him that the trip happened during my "most likely to conceive" days. He wanted me to have an abortion. I was okay with talking about it, but somehow being willing to have the conversation meant I was willing to abort. I started to feel like I was getting steamrolled. I lied hours before I was supposed to go to the clinic, and told him I'd started bleeding. He said, "Well, that's that." Five weeks later, I told him I thought I was still pregnant, and took a test and showed him. He said it was probably still showing up that way from the miscarriage. I took another a week later, and showed him, and he said, "Crap. I guess we're having a baby, honey." And he kissed me. I asked whether he was upset, and he just shrugged, "Hey, shit happens." Our son is now two. He loves him, and loves being a daddy. He cried when he first heard him cry, and cried again the first time he had to leave him in the hospital. He runs all over the house, playing the most elaborate peek a boo. They play David and Goliath, where my husband acts like a giant who's going to stomp on the little boy, but just manages to stomp around him. My son loves it when his daddy's legs walk over him, but always miss his head. Then as soon as he so much as touches my husband, he falls right down, "Oh, no! You got me! I am destroyed!" They love each other so much. I've asked my husband if he ever thinks about how we'd once talked about getting an abortion, and he said, "Not really. I don't usually think about what ifs, or things I can't change. But it doesn't matter. We didn't make a good baby. We made a great baby."

Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 6, 2014 at 6:56 PM
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Replies (1-10):
poohbearkfc
by Silver Member on Feb. 6, 2014 at 6:59 PM
6 moms liked this
Not sure what to say to that. But ok then. I wouldn't lie to my husband.
AuntieM
by Silver Member on Feb. 6, 2014 at 7:00 PM
4 moms liked this
Did he know you didn't take your birth control? Did he normally use condoms or pull out? Does he realize he was tricked?
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Feb. 6, 2014 at 7:05 PM
1 mom liked this

I told him I'd forgotten to pack it. He hates condoms. He pulled out all trip except for one night when he really didn't want to. It was on the tail end of my "no no" days, so he thought it was kind of safe.

He doesn't realize that I didn't think I'd miscarried.

Quoting AuntieM: Did he know you didn't take your birth control? Did he normally use condoms or pull out? Does he realize he was tricked?

 

definecorrupt
by Bronze Member on Feb. 6, 2014 at 7:06 PM
45 moms liked this

You could have and SHOULD have handled it differently in the begining, Its never okay to lie about that kind of thing.  You are very lucky to hasve a loving supporting man. This could have turned out drastically differently.

momoftwogirl55
by Gold Member on Feb. 6, 2014 at 7:07 PM
2 moms liked this
Wow...you're so wrong for that.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 6, 2014 at 7:08 PM
8 moms liked this
Is this supposed to be a 'See it works out in the end post'?
ajdahd13
by Platinum Member on Feb. 6, 2014 at 7:09 PM
8 moms liked this
Well. What's done is done. I'm glad it worked out for you, your son and DH, and I think I would keep that info from DH and DS.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 6, 2014 at 7:10 PM
6 moms liked this
So Hawaii doesn't have pharmacies? Wow. Remind me never to go there. I like to go to places that if I was to forget my meds at home I can call my doctor and get them to call it in to a pharmacy near me.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous on Feb. 6, 2014 at 7:12 PM
5 moms liked this
Guys move on easier, what's done is done and they don't even think about it.
cherib82
by Post Killer on Feb. 6, 2014 at 7:12 PM
2 moms liked this
Wow.
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