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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Hit him back!!!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 6 Replies
Are you OK with your child hitting back if he/she was hit first? Obviously there would be many different situations like a girl hitting a guy first or a little kid hitting a older kid first. But iI'm mostly talking about kids of the same age and gender. Do you tell them it's OK or would you punish them if they did?
I ask b/c I've always told my kids to not hit back, that the only time it's OK is if they actually really have to defend themselves. On the few occasions where my kids have hit, not punched just more of a slap, each other I have punished them both. But now it seems like they are afraid to stand up for themselves.
DS has always been much taller and bigger than other kids his age, so I really had to stress this on him ever since he was little b/c there has been times with friends kids that the other kid would hit my son, which wouldn't hurt my son physically that much, mostly would just make him mad, but when he would hit back it would really hurt the other kid so the other kid would come crying to his mom. So we would hear how my son hit him, but my son wouldn't be crying or even have a mark so I would usually put him in the corner and make him apologize. The other kids usually got off Scott free I guess the other parent felt like the hit they got from my son was punishment enough. Sorry, I'm rambling. But I'm concerned now b/c DS really seems like he's afraid now of standing up for himself for fear of getting in trouble. He even told that to me when I found out one of his friends kept hitting him in the leg and even though DS told him to stop he never hit him back. Idk, have I taught him right b/c he is following what I've taught him or have I made him a target for a bully? What do you teach your kids?
Posted by Anonymous on Feb. 19, 2014 at 3:45 AM
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Replies (1-6):
BelleVernonGirl
by Gold Member on Feb. 19, 2014 at 3:51 AM

I myself have never been in a fight...never needed to be.  I always told my kids if someone started shit to finish it...you can't let ppl walk on you.  They have never been in a fight with anyone one (other than each other lol)

Both of my girls are pretty easy going and nice girls but I hope that if a bitch ever tries some shit they don't lay down and take it...

notjustamomee
by Bronze Member on Feb. 19, 2014 at 3:51 AM
If it's an ongoing problem I usually tell my kids to hit back.
briellesmomma
by Velvet on Feb. 19, 2014 at 3:58 AM
I taught my daughter to come to me if she gets hit. She's 3 and she's special needs and she hits other kids. I will tell a kid to hit her back and that she better not hit them or she will get in trouble. I don't condone violence but she should not be hitting anyone.

My only exception is boys. If she hits a boy, I expect him to tell not hit her back. If I had sons, I would teach them the same. Unless she is endangering your life, you do not hit her back. You tell someone and let them deal with her.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Feb. 19, 2014 at 5:10 AM

Somebody's Gotta Be on the Other End of That Leash

weaveress
by Silver Member on Feb. 19, 2014 at 5:15 AM

I told my children that if anyone ever touches them they are to hit them as hard as they can. if they get in trouble daddy and i will be there to back them up. we've never been called. 

ChewyBrownies
by Platinum Member on Feb. 19, 2014 at 5:15 AM
Ds is taught to defend himself and do what he has to to get them off of him. I've told him to never start a fight. Because starting a fight and defending yourself are two totally different things.
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