I'm dumping my "friends" because they don't deserve me! SURPRISE! Hahaha!
Hello, OrangeBalloon here! Surprised? I bet you are. GOTCHA!!!!
Here is the real deal. Soooo many times I have seen people make opinions based on limited information. I'm glad to see that for once you all are on the ball and can see the truth! The mom in this story is ME! The friends bitching about me not spending time with me and dh are long time friends that confronted me with their issues yesterday. Here's problem with that bitch and her twat waffle fiancee.
1) We don't have any family that lives in this STATE. They all live on the East coast. So we don't have the luxury of easily finding a sitter. We did have a regular babysitter that we loved and dd loved. But she finished college, got a full time teaching job, and has a boy friend that she is very serious about. I don't want to bug her with babysitting anymore since she is a young woman with an exciting and busy life. We DO have a teen in our neighborhood that could watch dd. But that is NOT happening since that SAME girl has been a rude little shit to me in the past. Yeah you are not going to watch my kid, when my kid has better manners than YOU.
2) We DO have an insane schedule. Dh is working full time, going to school part-time, and now he is in a play. He is in a production of Sweeney Todd. He loves acting and he has done commercials and a few short films. They paid well. So he is keeping his name in the theatre circuit to help him land some acting gigs and it has always paid off. Dd goes to karate, swimming lessons, and I take care of the house and everything else. We are now thinking about getting dd into ballet. So yeah, busy life! I don't know why my friends think we have an endless amount of free time because we don't.
3) We do try to take turns watching dd so we can go out. Since dh is so busy and he does homework on the weekends this makes things a little bit harder but we manage. Dh does go out with friends when he can, and the poor guy needs a break with all that he does. I go to painting classes when time and money allows.
4) We have NEVER lied to our friends. NEVER. Most of them are very understanding about our situation and have remained very good friends with us. So the whole thing that my friend is saying about us RSVPing to an event and then we don't go? BOGUS! We have never said that we would go to one of her stupid, sloppy drunken, boring as watching fucking paint dry "parties". I mean even if we did have the time to go, we wouldn't.
5) I have no idea who it is that also feels this way about us. Maybe her friends, Jack Daniels, Jim Beam, and Jose Cuervo know something about that but no one I talked to does. Is it shocking that I don't let her, her mom, or her baked sister to watch dd?
6) Dd is NOT a handful. We have been told by just about everyone that she is a very mellow and EASY child to care for and she IS. She can sit and color quietly for a long long time. She's an only child so she is good at finding ways to stay busy without getting into things. The only thing I can think of as to why my friend would say this, is the one time dd got baby powder all over the place. But she was only 2 when that happened and she played with a big container of baby powder and shook it out all over the floor in her room. But damn! That was more than two years ago.
7) We have always had a great time when her kids come over. OH and the reason why they always come here is because our dd has bad allergies. That bitch lied when she mentioned she didn't have pets. She does and dd is very allergic to dogs. So we ask that people come here. Dd is too young for medications that would allow her to be around dogs a lot. So we keep her away from them as much as we can. No one has ever voiced having an issue with this until now.
8) These "friends" started all of this bull on facebook! Facebook for ffs! You couldn't make time to tell me in a message? Or just pick up the phone and call me? The WAR is raging on there and I'm for once trying not to say anything. But boy do I have a few choice things I'd really like to say to her.
I'm royally ticked off and I'm DONE. Dh is DONE. Most of our friends are DONE with them too.
I have to say that when things like this happen you find out who your real friends are. The replies and excuses that I made as the anon is my stupid NON friend's take on things. Clearly she is blinded by her own selfishness. She has always been a little bit self-centered but this is nuts. Why in the Hell were friends with these jerks in the first place? Oh that's right! She changed a lot when she met her dick of a fiancee. When she says she has helped us OH so much, it was mostly moral support when things were tough. It's not like we ever borrowed money from them.
Thanks for indulging me in my little ruse. I enjoyed it a lot and you've confirmed what I was already starting to believed. I'm just so mad.
So, I'm done with my "friends". I am a mom to two kids. I have a girl and a boy. They are 5 and 7. My "friends" have a 4 year old girl.
Now for some history. I'm divorced and I have a fiancee. We've been together for 3 years now and we are getting married this coming June. My "friends" are a couple that we have known for about 10 years. Me and my fiancee knew them from a long time ago. i can send my kids off to their dad's every other weekend, and my mom and sister will babysit them any time I need them too. I know I'm lucky in that respect. So me and my fiancee have people over to our house a lot. We like to have big parties and board games. It is always so much fun.
My "friends" hardly ever come around anymore. Ever since they had their dd, they stay at home a lot. I'm tired of their excuses to not coming out to spend time with us. When I had kids I didn't disappear and I hate that they are never around any more. It sucks.
When I talked to my 'friend" about it, she said it is because she doesn't trust sitters that she doesn't really know. Well how are you going to get to know anyone if you don't have them babysit? Duh! She looked at me and she was mad at me! She then went on to say that they did have a regular sitter but she got a full time and went away to school. It's been hard for them to find a sitter ever since. She's just too damn picky when it comes to sitters. We give them plenty of time to find a sitter. Then they will complain that they can't afford one. Blah, blah, blah. It is excuse after excuse.
Would you keep them as friends, or would you dump them too?
Clearly some of you are totally missing some things that I keep saying over and over again. WE DO have all of the kids together. We've done it many times. We are NOT hard core partiers. I just miss the funny conversations we used to have while playing a few board games and relaxing with a couple of cocktails. That's it! That is the extent of our parties. They are not these wild fores. They are relaxed adult gatherings and we don't want the kids there because honestly sometimes the conversations are well.....adult. lol I feel like these things would be fun and good for my friends. We are not asking them to spend tons of money going to dinner or movies and such. Just come by our house sometime. It would be nice to hang out when we are not in parent mode. Everyone needs a break right?
It is also not that we expect them to come over a lot. Just reconnect with us a little bit. I don't think that's too much to ask especially when you consider the fact that we have been there for them a lot over the years. They are also bitching and whining all the time about wanting to hang out with us! But they obviously don't mean it when they don't even TRY to see us. We used to go see them all the time. We'd like for them to reciprocate once in a great while. We don't expect them to drop everything. But there is a girl in their neighborhood that is a good sitter. We have another friend that used this same girl and they love her!!!
Oh and my mom and sister love to see my kids. They often ask for the kids to come over. I know that I'm lucky. I get it! But I can assure you that I'm not thrilled to drop my kids off with their dad. I think he's a jerk. But I try to make the best of my time when my kids are not with me. It is not like I'm pawning my kids off to other people. I wish they were with me more and I had full custody, but there is nothing illegal with my ex just being an ass.
******Another EDIT lol***********
So another poster pointed out something that I forgot to say. Why can't one of the parents watch the kids and let one them go out for a little while? The guys could have a guy's night out! Me and my girl friend could go do something! Why don't they ever do that?